Post-nuptial shutoff?

oh.

I'm a lesbian. Any letsrun hotties want to hook up?

That's not me. I really didn't want this to turn into a joke but I guess this thread has run it's course. It's been interesting.

As it has been for many others this thread has been a real eye opener. But I don't think that women lose their sexual desire. But rather I think women lose their sexual desire with their husband. I think women stay horny most of their lives.

For example a few weekends ago my friend and I (both 22 and recent college graduates) hit up the bars. Before the night started we joked about taking home a MILF. We saw a group of women in their 40s in one corner of the bar and my friend persuaded me into talking to them. I strolled over to a pack of intoxicated rapists. Turns out they all met in their group divorce support group. One women whispered in my ear how she wanted to take me home and teach me some things and then licked the outside of my ear while her friend reached into my pants and started groping my unit. Feeling violated I backed off and decided to chase girls my own age.

Good thing you were wearing sweatpants at the time.

young, dumb and not a troll wrote:

her friend reached into my pants and started groping my unit

I just read through this entire frigging thread again, one which I posted under several different screen names during the period of my divorce. Damn there is some bitterness and anger and hurt here.

young, dumb and not a troll wrote:

One women whispered in my ear how she wanted to take me home and teach me some things and then licked the outside of my ear while her friend reached into my pants and started groping my unit. Feeling violated I backed off and decided to chase girls my own age.

And you didn't go home with her/them?? OK, now MY gaydar's going off.....

heartlove wrote:

Yes. This is getting kind of personal but a lot of times I think of other women with my husband. Does this mean something?

Honestly, yes, it could. I am sometimes surprised when I find out that other women find my husband attractive. It's good to get hat perspective that you probably had when you first met. Knowing that he is still attractive to others is important to keep your attraction.

Yes this is a great thread. If was so frequent before marriage. Its now been once a week for 15 years. I had some difficulty with that frequency for the first 5 years but now I'm used to it.

Thanks I never really thought of it in that way. I guess that maybe in trying to imagine my husband in the throws of passion with someone else, I'm trying to think of how we were when we first met. This seems complicated. I've wondered too, if I might have some kind of hormone imbalance. That wouldn't really make sense though because I don't seem to lack sexual desire, just with him. Even writing this post out, I just feel terrible and that I'm inadequate in some way. Maybe this is what some of the other shutting off wives are feeling too.

Or......

It could be him not doing something that you need him to. Tell him what you like.

say its not so wrote:

Yes this is a great thread. If was so frequent before marriage. Its now been once a week for 15 years. I had some difficulty with that frequency for the first 5 years but now I'm used to it.

All you guys complaining about once a week need to wake the f*** up and thank your lucky stars. I am talking once a month if I was lucky and periods of 6-9 months at a stretch with nothing. Damn what I wouldn't have given for once a week.

All you guys complaining about once a week need to wake the f*** up and thank your lucky stars. I am talking once a month if I was lucky and periods of 6-9 months at a stretch with nothing. Damn what I wouldn't have given for once a week.[/quote]

True but its also the sense that they are doing you a favor. And, if you didn't ask it wouldn't happen.

say its not so wrote:

True but its also the sense that they are doing you a favor. And, if you didn't ask it wouldn't happen.

Maybe that's because you are acting like she is doing you a favor? Why not try acting like you are doing her a favor? Have an "all-about-her" night and see how that goes.

Maybe that's because you are acting like she is doing you a favor? Why not try acting like you are doing her a favor? Have an "all-about-her" night and see how that goes.[/quote]

Hmmmm...............Naw,.......... If that's what I would have to do,... then maybe once a week is not so bad.

It's possible. I was his first lover so maybe this is all my fault because I didn't really show him what I like. I guess I was trying to please him and be alluring while not really counting my own pleasure as part of the equation. O.k., this thread has been helpful. I'm going to try tonight...not so much because I want him but because I know if I don't try this could be a lifetime of no-passion and we're still young.

It's possible. I was his first lover so maybe this is all my fault because I didn't really show him what I like. I guess I was trying to please him and be alluring while not really counting my own pleasure as part of the equation. O.k., this thread has been helpful. I'm going to try tonight...not so much because I want him but because I know if I don't try this could be a lifetime of no-passion and we're still young.

I'm sorry, didn't mean to be insensitive. The longer I live the more I realize that everybody has issues, no matter how good things seem on the outside.

How's this for messed up? I've been married 2 years and my wife wants it more often than me, I'm talking once a day, and most of the time I can't keep up.

Sounds great, huh? Thing is, I'm still crazy about a woman I fell head-over-heels for almost 10 years ago who dumped me hardcore and dated a lot of my friends before marrying a guy who is eerily similar to me. We had dinner with them the other night, and I'm worse than ever. Can't stop thinking about her..... can't look at my wife without wishing that things had gone different, can't make love to her without wishing she were someone else. She wants it right now, but here I am typing this, trying to put it off. The shut-off is starting from my end.... I feel like it will end our marriage if I can't sort it out. I've tried for years to forget about this woman, but it doesn't matter what I do, I'm still crazy about her. I married my wife partly because she reminded me of her. It's not that my wife isn't attractive - she's beautiful, and good in bed - I'm just an asshole.

The fact is that if you are a real man your wife will be begging for it. As I have said before, distance runners are undersexed and when their wives find out, it is a real turn-off.

Here is the real deal; M-W train twice a day, too tired for sex; T track workout, again too tired for sex. F rest for long run on S, go to bed early; S too tired for sex from long run; S maybe a quickie, all of three minutes. Wife completely turned off by this ghost of a man she married. Runners appear to have a high degree of feminine traits. Wives quickly pick up on that.

A real man would have his wife begging for it. Sorry runners.