Keep one thing in mind: while teaching high school does not pay the same as many jobs (often requiring a JD, MBA, MD, etc.) almost all school districts enable teachers to retire with a pension, usually at least 50% of their highest salary, if not higher. Other than civil service, such as policemen, firemen and the like, almost no businesses have such a thing any more. It can make a huge difference when you retire. It is also almost impossible to lose your hob, unless you commit a felony or do something outrageous. Plus, teachers have summers off, as well as all of the school vacations. You can always go back to coaching, granted at the high school level, when your kids are older, if you want to spend the time given your love of the sport.
Bingo. And in a lot of locales, it’s more like 80% of highest salary. If someone retires at 60 and lives to be 90, that’s like retiring from teaching with 3 or 4 million $ in the bank.
I’m not saying teaching is easy; I’d never want to do it (though I used to “teach” at work), but I can see how the stability, retirement, and flexibility for family is attractive, particularly if there’s another bread winner in the house. And, by the way, the person who had the greatest impact on my life was my high school coach.
Dangit; accidentally hit the post button before writing.
Agreed; for stability, this can be great. Also, you can really build community roots and be well known locally and well respected locally. There can be a lot of value in this, even if it is not monetarily wealthy—just monetarily solid.
Also, some folks mentioned private schools. This is hit and miss and depends greatly on your locale.
Many private schools in many states pay LESS than public schools do for teachers, for coaches, and for almost everyone who works there.
The ones that do pay well? They exist. And they're coaches are often well established, and they often have an assistant in line to pick up if/when the current coach leaves.
*IF* the goal is to continue to coach runners with more stability then I think high school coaching is the best bet. That doesn't mean you cannot succeed doing what you're doing, or even going out on your own coaching, but you will have the financial strain on you and your marriage and family, plus you may need to have a non-coaching job anyway to bring in money and/or benefits.
Some people have mentioned teaching HS as a possibility. But my advice is to make sure that you don't teach English. I've done that before, it's awful. If you can teach something else, it can be a very good gig.
However, coaching HS and teaching can still be pretty time-consuming. It's not going to have the recruiting or travel challenges of a college coach, but it's still an extra 2-3 hours every day after school plus meets.
Please hear me out - get a life coach. Just like you know a lot about helping people to run well in mid d and cross, a life coach knows how to help people who are in your position. That is their job, that is what they have spent years doing, and that is their expertise. You mentioned that you kind of have no idea what to do. This is so common, and that's why there are people for this - just hire a coach and let them do their thing. Sure, you could self coach yourself into a new career, but it's kind of like comparing one of your runners who follows your thoughtful direction and leverages your deep expertise, to someone who makes a bunch of emotion-driven training decisions fueled by random stuff they find on the internet. And a coach will not just help you find a direction, but will also help you craft a plan and set some good goals. Your stress level will come back to earth, and you'll make some solid moves that will be good for you and your family. You've got this.
For context, I'm not really prepared to successfully do anything else. I double majored in two liberal arts degrees, masters in English. I don't have the drive of a salesman, or the motor of any like entrepreneur, hustler type. More than likely my career prospects outside of this are HS teacher.
I'm lost and could use some words from people who've been in my shoes. I don't want to have a miserable family, but also I don't want to regret giving up on the career that I'm excited to go to everyday. I don't think that comes around very often.
1) If you don't have the drive (and skills/ethics of a salesman), you will never rise to the very top of NCAA coaching. People don't want to admit it - but that's the #1 required skill set. That's why the top coaches make up accents to seem more smart, invent fake scholarship deadlines to get kids to recruit before they visit another school, purposely withold attention so the kids will crave and think they are a guru, etc.
2) Your wife wants you home. The answer is simple. Be a teacher and coach HS. Stable job. Summers off. No recruiting. Same career - MUCH easier on a family. Plus a pension.
/End of thread.
IF you want to discuss this. Call me. 844-538-7786 ext 4 . I always said the following about coaching. "It's a lot of fun. What do rich people do? They buy sports teams or race horses as the adrenaline rush is insane. Coaches get that all the time."
The downside, you ae working 35-40 weekends a year for 35-40k a year and you could be fired at any minute (budgetary reasons, one scandal, one disillusioned kid, etc).
I left coach 5 years ago and honestly should have done it sooner.
My marriage wasnt at a breaking point but we were getting close. Two young kids, all the weekends and they pay was horrible.
Time with my family has been great. I don’t love my job, but it pays so much better.
I thought I would miss it more but I really don’t. There are a lot of bad parts of the job you have to put up with that you don’t notice until you are doing something else
What do you do now?
For people who left the profession, the OP needs ideas so mention that.
Family is more important than a job; if you can't do both pick the family. With that said you can have a family and coach. Just find more balance.
I am a mid major coach with three kids at home. They are school age and have activities of their own. I am not working a ton over winter break, nor am I that busy in June/July (or the back half of May if no one makes first rounds).
The NCAA coaches actually should change the schedule to make things easier. At the coaches party at NCAA xc, I was shocked that a top NCAA coach who has won NCAA titles told me this.
1) Ban all track meets before January.
2) Make the NCAA outdoor meet end in early May (I'd allow one meet the week after NCAA XC).
3) Greatly limit recruiting. The best kids are going to the best schools. Recruiting for underclassmen should be limited to like 1 month or abolished. For seniors, I'd limit it as well.
No recruiting at all in the spring. Let the coaches enjoy May/June at a minimum (the problem ist he top kids at the biggest schools will still need to be coached to USAs/Worlds, etc).
I've been a college coach for 6 years now. I started as an NAIA head coach, had some success. Now I'm an assistant at a mid major coaching Middle Distance and Cross Country.
I think my wife hates my job. She would never say so directly because of how much I like it, but I feel certain that she wishes I did something else. I don't spend a lot of time at home. I travel. We have a baby under 1. Obviously the pay is not great. She's expressed that all those things deeply frustrate her. We talked about how leaving college coaching temporarily and trying to return after our son got a bit older and we've had some stability would also be bad for her because it's like temporary happiness for her.
The idea of possibly having to move every couple of years to advance my career or when a head coach is let go or to find a head coaching gig myself is also a negative for her.
Her friends think I should do something else. Her dad thinks I should do something else. But I love it. I love coaching so much. It feels like something that gives me purpose and it's fun and I can't imagine working another job and being a fraction of as happy as I am at this one.
For context, I'm not really prepared to successfully do anything else. I double majored in two liberal arts degrees, masters in English. I don't have the drive of a salesman, or the motor of any like entrepreneur, hustler type. More than likely my career prospects outside of this are HS teacher.
I'm lost and could use some words from people who've been in my shoes. I don't want to have a miserable family, but also I don't want to regret giving up on the career that I'm excited to go to everyday. I don't think that comes around very often.
I'm a high school soccer and track coach with a masters degree. I make $88,000 base pay and just about 6 figures with coaching and tutoring stipends. I have 2 weeks off for winter break, tons of bank holidays, and a 2.5 months off for summer. I spend all of my time teaching a subject I love and introducing kids to a sport for the first time. It's really not a bad life.
I've been a college coach for 6 years now. I started as an NAIA head coach, had some success. Now I'm an assistant at a mid major coaching Middle Distance and Cross Country.
I think my wife hates my job. She would never say so directly because of how much I like it, but I feel certain that she wishes I did something else. I don't spend a lot of time at home. I travel. We have a baby under 1. Obviously the pay is not great. She's expressed that all those things deeply frustrate her. We talked about how leaving college coaching temporarily and trying to return after our son got a bit older and we've had some stability would also be bad for her because it's like temporary happiness for her.
The idea of possibly having to move every couple of years to advance my career or when a head coach is let go or to find a head coaching gig myself is also a negative for her.
Her friends think I should do something else. Her dad thinks I should do something else. But I love it. I love coaching so much. It feels like something that gives me purpose and it's fun and I can't imagine working another job and being a fraction of as happy as I am at this one.
For context, I'm not really prepared to successfully do anything else. I double majored in two liberal arts degrees, masters in English. I don't have the drive of a salesman, or the motor of any like entrepreneur, hustler type. More than likely my career prospects outside of this are HS teacher.
I'm lost and could use some words from people who've been in my shoes. I don't want to have a miserable family, but also I don't want to regret giving up on the career that I'm excited to go to everyday. I don't think that comes around very often.
For what it’s worth, I get it. I know a coach who has three different jobs at varying points of the season. It sounds brutal and he makes it work. But it’s not for everyone.
For context, I'm not really prepared to successfully do anything else. I double majored in two liberal arts degrees, masters in English. I don't have the drive of a salesman, or the motor of any like entrepreneur, hustler type. More than likely my career prospects outside of this are HS teacher.
I'm lost and could use some words from people who've been in my shoes. I don't want to have a miserable family, but also I don't want to regret giving up on the career that I'm excited to go to everyday. I don't think that comes around very often.
1) If you don't have the drive (and skills/ethics of a salesman), you will never rise to the very top of NCAA coaching. People don't want to admit it - but that's the #1 required skill set. That's why the top coaches make up accents to seem more smart, invent fake scholarship deadlines to get kids to recruit before they visit another school, purposely withold attention so the kids will crave and think they are a guru, etc.
This is totally what makes a great coach.
We are all in the profession to manipulate and lie to the kids for our own benefit!
My wife and I talked about it at length. The communication was hard but definitely needed there were more things than just my career at play. Either way she said she could never ask me to stop coaching because of how much I enjoy it. So if I decide to leave college coaching, she can't be a part of the decision making process and she isn't sure that if I left, she could handle the guilt she'd feel. So I proposed we set a time limit for things to get better and keep communicating with the contingency that if for some reason it gets significantly worse before the agreed timeline I'd pull the ripcord and move onto HS teaching
Other big factors in my wife's unhappiness are that we moved to a town with nothing for her, none of her friends are here, and it's very hard for them to visit, no mom groups, none of her hobbies, no big parks, no aquarium. All the schools our child would attend are very bad. It's also 4 hours from both our parents, her friends, and any help. We do have part time child care so that my wife can do her work from home job.
A school year to find better work life balance, or move to a different college position that allows for and has a culture of more flexibility with office time (I did have a much better balance as an NAIA head coach). Or find a coaching a job that pays for more a comfortable life for my family.
Also she's an absolute champ. She works from home, and watches our child with little help. She picked up and moved to a little college town with me when she was pregnant even though we lived in an awesome city at the NAIA job.
I've made peace with moving on. Along with more time with my son, there are things for me that not coaching would allow me to do more of that I'm excited about. I think it's going to be okay
Please hear me out - get a life coach. Just like you know a lot about helping people to run well in mid d and cross, a life coach knows how to help people who are in your position. That is their job, that is what they have spent years doing, and that is their expertise. You mentioned that you kind of have no idea what to do. This is so common, and that's why there are people for this - just hire a coach and let them do their thing. Sure, you could self coach yourself into a new career, but it's kind of like comparing one of your runners who follows your thoughtful direction and leverages your deep expertise, to someone who makes a bunch of emotion-driven training decisions fueled by random stuff they find on the internet. And a coach will not just help you find a direction, but will also help you craft a plan and set some good goals. Your stress level will come back to earth, and you'll make some solid moves that will be good for you and your family. You've got this.
Please hear me out - get a life coach. Just like you know a lot about helping people to run well in mid d and cross, a life coach knows how to help people who are in your position. That is their job, that is what they have spent years doing, and that is their expertise. You mentioned that you kind of have no idea what to do. This is so common, and that's why there are people for this - just hire a coach and let them do their thing. Sure, you could self coach yourself into a new career, but it's kind of like comparing one of your runners who follows your thoughtful direction and leverages your deep expertise, to someone who makes a bunch of emotion-driven training decisions fueled by random stuff they find on the internet. And a coach will not just help you find a direction, but will also help you craft a plan and set some good goals. Your stress level will come back to earth, and you'll make some solid moves that will be good for you and your family. You've got this.
Let me guess......you're a life coach?
Nope, just a guy who wished he had been given this advice long ago. You can DIY this stuff (I did) but the road to where you want to get can be a lot longer than it has to be.
I coached at an NAIA for a few years and am now a HS teacher and coach and am much happier. There's BS you have to deal with just like any job but I get the same fulfillment of coaching and get to see my family every night/weekend. Don't listen to what other people say about taking work home either. If you're good at managing time during contract hours you wont take anything home.
I'm a high school soccer and track coach with a masters degree. I make $88,000 base pay and just about 6 figures with coaching and tutoring stipends. I have 2 weeks off for winter break, tons of bank holidays, and a 2.5 months off for summer. I spend all of my time teaching a subject I love and introducing kids to a sport for the first time. It's really not a bad life.
This is a great perspective. I think teachers and coaches have to be saints to be really good at their jobs. But that often includes filling up a lot of those weeks and months of vacation with professional development, prep, and practices.
My wife and I talked about it at length. The communication was hard but definitely needed there were more things than just my career at play. Either way she said she could never ask me to stop coaching because of how much I enjoy it. So if I decide to leave college coaching, she can't be a part of the decision making process and she isn't sure that if I left, she could handle the guilt she'd feel. So I proposed we set a time limit for things to get better and keep communicating with the contingency that if for some reason it gets significantly worse before the agreed timeline I'd pull the ripcord and move onto HS teaching
Other big factors in my wife's unhappiness are that we moved to a town with nothing for her, none of her friends are here, and it's very hard for them to visit, no mom groups, none of her hobbies, no big parks, no aquarium. All the schools our child would attend are very bad. It's also 4 hours from both our parents, her friends, and any help. We do have part time child care so that my wife can do her work from home job.
A school year to find better work life balance, or move to a different college position that allows for and has a culture of more flexibility with office time (I did have a much better balance as an NAIA head coach). Or find a coaching a job that pays for more a comfortable life for my family.
Also she's an absolute champ. She works from home, and watches our child with little help. She picked up and moved to a little college town with me when she was pregnant even though we lived in an awesome city at the NAIA job.
I've made peace with moving on. Along with more time with my son, there are things for me that not coaching would allow me to do more of that I'm excited about. I think it's going to be okay
Thanks for following up. You handled it really, really well. Good luck to you and your family!
I've been a college coach for 6 years now. I started as an NAIA head coach, had some success. Now I'm an assistant at a mid major coaching Middle Distance and Cross Country.
I think my wife hates my job. She would never say so directly because of how much I like it, but I feel certain that she wishes I did something else. I don't spend a lot of time at home. I travel. We have a baby under 1. Obviously the pay is not great. She's expressed that all those things deeply frustrate her. We talked about how leaving college coaching temporarily and trying to return after our son got a bit older and we've had some stability would also be bad for her because it's like temporary happiness for her.
The idea of possibly having to move every couple of years to advance my career or when a head coach is let go or to find a head coaching gig myself is also a negative for her.
Her friends think I should do something else. Her dad thinks I should do something else. But I love it. I love coaching so much. It feels like something that gives me purpose and it's fun and I can't imagine working another job and being a fraction of as happy as I am at this one.
For context, I'm not really prepared to successfully do anything else. I double majored in two liberal arts degrees, masters in English. I don't have the drive of a salesman, or the motor of any like entrepreneur, hustler type. More than likely my career prospects outside of this are HS teacher.
I'm lost and could use some words from people who've been in my shoes. I don't want to have a miserable family, but also I don't want to regret giving up on the career that I'm excited to go to everyday. I don't think that comes around very often.
Do what makes you happy. You said you love it. Whatever your wife’s issues are are her issues.