New Dad here--how do I get my kids to become (great) runners?

Teach them discipline and respect; discipline in all things that they do and respect for themselves and others.

The best way to teach these things is through your actions. I presume that as a runner you have a certain level of discipline. Your sons are watching you and will learn from you. To teach them respect you must show them respect. Do not push them to do things they do not want to do. I've seen too many 6 year olds crying at the start of a kids fun run or on a soccer pitch because their parents pushed them. My boys have sat out many fun runs because 'they chose' not to participate. On the other hand, my boys have also occasionally asked my wife or me to run with us when we go (we go separately). My wife or I will take them for a jog around the neighborhood and let them quit when they want. We never push or even ask them to go.

I remember several years ago seeing a couple with a young son at a local 5k race. They were both obviously avid endurance athletes (as evidenced by their matching ironman tattoos on their ankles), although I believe they were mid-packers. Their son did not want to run the fun run (a loop around the parking lot), but they drug him to the start line anyway and he just stood their crying. Not a good day for anyone. Don't be these people.

Check out "Why Me? The Bob Lamonta Story" about the famous runner of the same name and why he started running.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxPjYSay9g0

It's not about what you like, it's about what they like. If they prefer baseball or wrestling or ballet or hockey, that's your favorite sport. Being a parent means it's not about you anymore, it's about them.

Keep them active in all sports. Have them follow you on runs and take them to big races no matter the distance. Usually, the runner atmosphere lures them in. They will either like to compete or chit chat with other runners. But, don't make them run. They will eventually pick what they want or are better at. Then nurture what they pick. My kids grew up with us at the university with our coach and teammates. They follow us to races and watch running on tv or internet. They seem to gravitate more to running than anything, but we still have them other sports.

kids, particularly young kids, are inspired by the minor accomplishments of parents. they start running and asking to run if you run and give them your medals from races; they play the piano if you play the piano (unfortunately, often WHEN you are playing the piano). I'm interested by this phenomenon of the parents and teachers who have the philosophy of non-interference, taken to the extreme of teaching children nothing. no wonder immigrants are continually defeating 3rd and higher generation Americans in academics and athletics. Kids can rarely invent from whole cloth and enact entire methodologies and bodies of knowledge; they need help. And that is why, for instance, top high school runners typically come from programs with many successful athletes. There is a coach not afraid to coach and to push. If you think that a little pushing and introduction, etc. are horrible, look at youth football and basketball coaches. They make the 'worst' college track coaches look soft.

Excellent advice.

Also good advice. If the kids get to try stuff long enough to see whether they are good and enjoy it, and if they do some difficult things, they get a sense of accomplishment and values that extend beyond the 'if you like it immediately, do it, but drop out otherwise' crowd. But the way that you do it has to be cognizant of who your kid is. And yelling at your kids when they don't do what you want is not going to work in most cases. If you make physical activity or academic prep stuff fun, entertaining, and challenging when they are very young and listen to your kids, they will be self-motivated and go far beyond you later.

I hate to say it, but it is narcissistic to try to figure out how to make your kids great runners because you like running. My advice is to expose to kids to various activities, athletic and otherwise, and see what they like, not what you like. My advice is about raising happy, healthy kids. On the other hand, if you want to raise miserable kids or kids who "appear" happy but are secretly miserable, then continue to find ways to make your kids into great runners because you like running.

Two books on narcissism:

The Narcisstic Family by Pressman

Why Is It Always About You? by Sandy Hotchkiss

If they run, they'll be much healthier and live about 6 years longer on average.

McFlounder wrote:

Be an abusive drunk ... so that running 50 miles in a day, seems like a relatively pleasant thing to do. It worked for that crazy Gerry guy.

Hey Gerry, I didn't know you still came around these parts.

I came to running late in my life, after 22 years of soccer had left me with so many knee, ankle, foot and head injuries that it was basically down to swimming or running if I wanted to stay active. NOW I love running and I've discovered I have a decent talent for it. Nothing that would have ever gotten me to the Olympics or anything, but had I started running as a kid I probably would have been a lot better at it than I ever was at soccer. Actually I was only a decent soccer player because I could outsprint pretty much anyone, could keep doing it for 90 minutes, and was tactically adept at a very young age. On the ball I was crap, had lousy kicking technique and balance.

Anyway, back then I thought track and field athletes were boring anti-social dweebs. And I still think that. Lots of awesome fun people on the road running circuit but the young post-collegiate runners are pretty lame, boring and totally devoid of social skills. So while I may have dreams about my son taking to running I actually would prefer that he does something else and becomes an interesting person. I'll let him sample whatever sports he wants and I hope he'll pick soccer as his primary sport even if he's no more talented at it than his old man. His mom was a synchronized swimmer - I think I may draw the line there.

Dew Nad wrote:Anyway, back then I thought track and field athletes were boring anti-social dweebs.

They are- check out the recent 'how do I mend my relationships with coworkers thread'.

Prove it or STFU wrote:

I ran to get away from my dad.

Yea, one my reasons as well. In addition to burning off that testosterone and other sources of teenage angsts.

My dad tried to push me into baseball. As a result, he reduced my enjoyment of baseball. Just don't push too hard or it might haunt the kid for years and he won't like you.

Are you willing to let your wife sleep with an east African? Probably your best shot. No chance for this first one though.

The biggest problem in America is that most people that are in sports are simply doing the first sport they came across they liked rather than the sport they're truly the best at.

You can introduce your kids to things but beyond that, you have very little power in them continuing with it unless they come to like it. They'll get turned off by it if you pressure them, esp. when they become teens.

Just be happy if they are not getting into trouble and love them for what THEY chose to do or become. Nothing is worse than living vicariously through your child. You had choices, now let them have theirs!

let them run if they want. forcing it will backfire. I would hate it if my dad pestered me to do something I hated. Also, what if they do run, the odds of them being great are slim...

1. If THEY don't want to be great around 15 - 22 then don't worry about them being great. Figure out how to make them WANT IT bad. And yes, pushing them is aweful. They HAVE to push themselves.

2. At around 14 - 15 its time to help your little guy turn into a bad ass. Get him around coaches that will make him work harder than anybody you have ever seen. Tell him great job when he's great, and NEVER tell him he did good when he didn't.

3. Running is an individual sport, and burnout can be rampent. So don't expect him to be a bad ass in 3rd grade and carry it through college. Give him some downtime before high school.

4. And yes before 14 - 15 have him do a variety of sports. Not just running.

Pop my tent why don't you wrote:

Make sure they fail with the opposite sex. They will run out their frustrations. Worked for me.

Got a laugh out of this one.

...it's funny because it's true. Failing with the opposite sex helps grades too.