Ok, I've been with my girlfriend for about 8 months and she's suggested for a while that we go to a local run club that is all over her social media. She doesn't run but stays active at the gym and stuff while I run on my own, nothing crazy but I race and do workouts and try to stay in decent shape. Well, we went to the run club and it was pretty eye opening to see just how many girls were almost exactly like my girlfriend, lined up in head to toe Lulu/Alo/Vuori with a mix of Alphaflys and Hokas for kicks. I shuffled along with them through 3 miles of talking about coffee shops, their favorite tv shows (Ted Lasso, The Office, Parks & Rec), or celebrity bs gossip. By the end, it felt like I'd done a trail ultra. I was exhausted! It was also a little eye-opening to see just how basic my girlfriend was in her "natural habitat." This has actually made me question my relationship with her and just left me with this weird feeling about it. I'm not some crazy avant-garde dude who has all kinds of niche interests but I did feel a little like that scene in Toy Story where Buzz sees all the other toys just like him on the shelf, except it was a whole run squad of my girlfriend and she just seamlessly mixed in with them. Am I crazy or overreacting? Is it that big of a deal to be with someone who is "basic" in their mid-twenties?
You might be right. He did sound a little shallow. I don't know why he would consider their outfits as "basic." They probably looked great. Better than the other 99% of humanity.
However, I would be curious to know what his other friends are like and what they talk about on their runs. If you come from a background of pretty interesting people or really smart people, talking about the "NFL and MLB sports teams" and "the TV shows" can seem weirdly vapid.
Haven't you ever gone to a random party and realized everyone was just circulating gossip about celebrities (the women) and/or talking about fantasy football (the men)? It makes you want to get back to your real friends as fast as possible... If that is what the OP is talking about, I guess I know the feeling.
What if your spouse could only talk about the things she saw on TV or friend gossip? I don't know how you could spend a life with that person. Could you only be friends with a dude who just wanted to talk about Tom Brady and the Lakers all the time? It would be so boring.
I guess I would ask the OP, is your GF smart and interesting when she is with you? If so, don't worry about it. If she is not, then you have a larger problem than her running club.
1. You should have been running with the guys. Weirdo.
2. You are boring to your girlfriend. Like, do you literally not read what you write?
I actually made a conscious decision NOT to run with the guys. When we showed up, there was a group of guys all with their shirts already off, those Oakley sunglasses that look like something Hulk Hogan would wear, and all wearing carbon shoes. Most of them also had mustaches. I think they were honestly more basic than the girls.
So what you are saying is everyone is basic and you are special. What do you and your girlfriend usually talk about? What do you want to talk about that makes you interesting and not basic?
Ok, I've been with my girlfriend for about 8 months and she's suggested for a while that we go to a local run club that is all over her social media. She doesn't run but stays active at the gym and stuff while I run on my own, nothing crazy but I race and do workouts and try to stay in decent shape. Well, we went to the run club and it was pretty eye opening to see just how many girls were almost exactly like my girlfriend, lined up in head to toe Lulu/Alo/Vuori with a mix of Alphaflys and Hokas for kicks. I shuffled along with them through 3 miles of talking about coffee shops, their favorite tv shows (Ted Lasso, The Office, Parks & Rec), or celebrity bs gossip. By the end, it felt like I'd done a trail ultra. I was exhausted! It was also a little eye-opening to see just how basic my girlfriend was in her "natural habitat." This has actually made me question my relationship with her and just left me with this weird feeling about it. I'm not some crazy avant-garde dude who has all kinds of niche interests but I did feel a little like that scene in Toy Story where Buzz sees all the other toys just like him on the shelf, except it was a whole run squad of my girlfriend and she just seamlessly mixed in with them. Am I crazy or overreacting? Is it that big of a deal to be with someone who is "basic" in their mid-twenties?
No, you are not crazy and understandably want a girlfriend with a lower ph (penis hump count).
"How dare my girlfriend be able to engage in normal conversation with other people?!?!?"
While I do think the shoes are a bit ridiculous, you're very much overreacting. It's not basic to be into fitness and have interests that are generally pretty popular, basic is having a flat personality, which I hope is not the case if you've been with her for that long.
Ok, I've been with my girlfriend for about 8 months and she's suggested for a while that we go to a local run club that is all over her social media. She doesn't run but stays active at the gym and stuff while I run on my own, nothing crazy but I race and do workouts and try to stay in decent shape. Well, we went to the run club and it was pretty eye opening to see just how many girls were almost exactly like my girlfriend, lined up in head to toe Lulu/Alo/Vuori with a mix of Alphaflys and Hokas for kicks. I shuffled along with them through 3 miles of talking about coffee shops, their favorite tv shows (Ted Lasso, The Office, Parks & Rec), or celebrity bs gossip. By the end, it felt like I'd done a trail ultra. I was exhausted! It was also a little eye-opening to see just how basic my girlfriend was in her "natural habitat." This has actually made me question my relationship with her and just left me with this weird feeling about it. I'm not some crazy avant-garde dude who has all kinds of niche interests but I did feel a little like that scene in Toy Story where Buzz sees all the other toys just like him on the shelf, except it was a whole run squad of my girlfriend and she just seamlessly mixed in with them. Am I crazy or overreacting? Is it that big of a deal to be with someone who is "basic" in their mid-twenties?
you lost me when you went on a run with a bunch of women lmao
You might be right. He did sound a little shallow. I don't know why he would consider their outfits as "basic." They probably looked great. Better than the other 99% of humanity.
However, I would be curious to know what his other friends are like and what they talk about on their runs. If you come from a background of pretty interesting people or really smart people, talking about the "NFL and MLB sports teams" and "the TV shows" can seem weirdly vapid.
Haven't you ever gone to a random party and realized everyone was just circulating gossip about celebrities (the women) and/or talking about fantasy football (the men)? It makes you want to get back to your real friends as fast as possible... If that is what the OP is talking about, I guess I know the feeling.
What if your spouse could only talk about the things she saw on TV or friend gossip? I don't know how you could spend a life with that person. Could you only be friends with a dude who just wanted to talk about Tom Brady and the Lakers all the time? It would be so boring.
I guess I would ask the OP, is your GF smart and interesting when she is with you? If so, don't worry about it. If she is not, then you have a larger problem than her running club.
The bolded part nailed pretty much how I was feeling when I posted this. Not to say my friends and I are really smart and have all these intellectual, esoteric interests but we don't talk exclusively about fantasy football or the latest Marvel movie. It's been pretty similar since I started dating my girlfriend and I wouldn't describe any of her friends I've met so far as "basic" the way I laid it out in the first post. Again, it was our first time at this run club so we didn't really know anybody there so I guess she was going with the flow and talking about lowest common denominator topics. It did make me realize that she is way better at adapting to social situations like that, whereas I just either feel uncomfortable or kind of roll my eyes that we have to talk about this stuff. Hoping some of her skills start to rub off on me.
"Good morning," said the roses. The little prince gazed at them. They all looked like his flower. "Who are you?" he demanded, thunderstruck. "We are roses," the roses said. And he was overcome with sadness. His flower had told him that she was the only one of her kind in all the universe. And here were five thousand of them, all alike, in one single garden!
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