Jakobs oldest brother Kristoffer opens up about Gjerts abuse in podcast and article

SadAndNoExcuses wrote:

Forcing one of the siblings in the shower with cold water in the middle of the night because they wouldn't sleep (as a toddler)

Stepping on Henriks head as a toddler

One of the siblings being punched in the face for forgetting a pulse watch

.. and a whole bunch of other stuff that kids should never have to experience.

He also comments on why most of the brothers still live very close to the parents (why should the victims give up the area they grew up in and have all their friends and network), and bitterness towards their mother for not standing up for the kids.

I live 10 minutes from Sandnes and have been thinking that this should have been solved as an internal family thing, but considering the most recent information and how long it has taken for this to come out publicly (though there has been rumours), it seems to me that the siblings has been patient for a very long time and that Gjert refuses to acknowledge that he has done anything wrong, and thus forcing their hand. If he had taken responsibility for his actions and retired as a coach instead of claiming his innocence this would have ended a lot better for all parties.

This is just sad, bottom line, and there is no excuses for what Gjert has put these kids through.

Interview was given to the paper aftenposten/aftenbladet and is behind paywall

LRC Note: Here is the article. You can get a guest subscription for 1 KR for the first trial month.

Link:www.aftenposten.no/norge/i/dR73Xj/inte...

justanothercuriousdude wrote:

Purrwegian wrote:

Link to the story itself:

Some of it is not locked behind a paywall, but much of the story is. It should be possible to subscribe from abroad using a credit/debit card to be allowed access to the full story (and run through a translator service)

Link:www.aftenposten.no/norge/i/dR73Xj/inte...

Rojo has given an English version of the interview, on the Lrc main side. But he left out the end, where Kristoffer stresses the following: He feels very marked by his upbringing. -He has got a lot of anxiety, and doesn’t deal so good with physical nearness from his daughters or from his wife. And that he has become short tempered. And that alcohol seems to help for the anxiety. And that he never has sought professional psychologically help. But that he probably should have been medicated… And he accuses Gjert of ruining his joy of running and sport for many years.

My comments to these last sentences from Kristoffer: First and foremost I am glad he doesn’t take any medication -pills are really really dangerous. And there’s a good alternative: Being outspoken, getting support from (the right) family members and friends; analysing and trying to understand and feel. -Very good hearing he has this good support from his wife and his running brothers and sister.

Attending a psychologist: One can get lucky in finding a skilled one, with real empathy and focus, but the odds for that sadly seems very bad. -Even some therapists are warning here about the majority of their colleagues…

Personally experience: 1. Long walks or too much rest / passivity don’t hold the difficult thoughts/anxiety away. -It’s much better with training/running (but not too easy) hard enough to take away the thought process. Or doing manually labor that aren’t too simple. And everything that takes away focus from the difficult thoughts/feelings….

2. Not suppressing the anxiety. Read psychology and engaging literature, and put words on your own problems/upbringing, and discuss. -I’m glad Kristoffer seems to have good support here, and that he has taken up running again “in his old days” -is now a hobby jogger with a HM pb of 1.12 (with good potential for faster times)….

high school xc coach wrote:

justanothercuriousdude wrote:

Rojo has given an English version of the interview, on the Lrc main side. But he left out the end, where Kristoffer stresses the following: He feels very marked by his upbringing. -He has got a lot of anxiety, and doesn’t deal so good with physical nearness from his daughters or from his wife. And that he has become short tempered. And that alcohol seems to help for the anxiety. And that he never has sought professional psychologically help. But that he probably should have been medicated… And he accuses Gjert of ruining his joy of running and sport for many years.

My comments to these last sentences from Kristoffer: First and foremost I am glad he doesn’t take any medication -pills are really really dangerous. And there’s a good alternative: Being outspoken, getting support from (the right) family members and friends; analysing and trying to understand and feel. -Very good hearing he has this good support from his wife and his running brothers and sister.

Attending a psychologist: One can get lucky in finding a skilled one, with real empathy and focus, but the odds for that sadly seems very bad. -Even some therapists are warning here about the majority of their colleagues…

Personally experience: 1. Long walks or too much rest / passivity don’t hold the difficult thoughts/anxiety away. -It’s much better with training/running (but not too easy) hard enough to take away the thought process. Or doing manually labor that aren’t too simple. And everything that takes away focus from the difficult thoughts/feelings….

2. Not suppressing the anxiety. Read psychology and engaging literature, and put words on your own problems/upbringing, and discuss. -I’m glad Kristoffer seems to have good support here, and that he has taken up running again “in his old days” -is now a hobby jogger with a HM pb of 1.12 (with good potential for faster times)….

this stuff is complicated, and a lot of what he has going on is probably nature as well as nurture. he has inherited Gjert's personality. Talks about being short tempered. Gjert probably had an even worse upbringing than what he gave.

I don't believe he is some kind of demon he is being made out to be. In many cases, he probably thought he was doing what was best.

Mistakes have been made, and hopefully everybody is able to grow from the experiences.

another I think that i will get shlt on for saying, is that encouraging people to feel like victims is not always the healthiest. and this is a problem with bad psychological "help"