I’d think it’d be hard to do but one of fiancés friends (31) is dating her boss’s boss (45) and he’s also married. Keeps telling her he’s going to divorce her but it’s been 3 years and he still hasn’t. My fiancé’s friend is an idiot for still believing him but that’s a different story. He’s coming to a wedding of one of our friends in a few weeks. Not sure what his wife thinks either because he’s never with her and they live together
We have 3% unemployment in this country now. It’s a great time to get fired. Good time to take a chance.
if she likes to wear revealing tops to give you a peak, maybe you leave the fly unzipped while going commando, and give her a little peak at what you bring to the party. Two can play that game
I would not do it! Not a smart choice at all. I would look outside of the work place. My wife and I both work at the same place I am much higher in the organizational rank structure but we are in different areas and she started working at our agency after I had already established myself and we both decided she was a good fit. Starting a relationship with a subordinate says to management that you are not leadership material.
Most middle and upper class adults spend an enormous number of waking hours at work. It’s unreasonable to expect people not to date. It’s what men and women do. There shouldn’t be anything subversive or damnable about it. The sole exception is if someone obviously gets a raise or promotion due to sex. Other than that it’s no one’s business.
INCORRECT! (partially)
What you are saying makes sense ONLY IF neither of the two people involved is in a position of power over the other at work.
I married my boss more than 10 years ago. (I am female.) We both figured we were risking our jobs by having a relationship. Perhaps now the risk would be more on him, but I definitely figured I was at the very least risking looking like a fool and a tramp in the office. But I also knew he was special and that our attraction was real. It was a small company, so the only real option was to leave, which one of us eventually did. But we dated at work for a long time. Neither of us told anyone at work, and I do mean no one. We didn't do PDA. Not just at work - never. We didn't communicate anything unrelated to work on work computers or really even talk inappropriately at work even in private. It also really meant we couldn't have any close friendships with coworkers, since we basically had to lie to everyone about our relationship.
Worth it. We have a few kids now and risking my job to date and marry him was 1000 times worth it. He says the same. I don't think it's "immoral" to fall in love with your boss / subordinate and follow your heart. Unprofessional - definitely. Risky - 100%. But quite possibly worth it.
The original poster should probably wait six months and make sure he and this woman really have a connection. But people are so uptight. Real life is messy but it can be wonderful.
I married my boss more than 10 years ago. (I am female.) We both figured we were risking our jobs by having a relationship. Perhaps now the risk would be more on him, but I definitely figured I was at the very least risking looking like a fool and a tramp in the office. But I also knew he was special and that our attraction was real. It was a small company, so the only real option was to leave, which one of us eventually did. But we dated at work for a long time. Neither of us told anyone at work, and I do mean no one. We didn't do PDA. Not just at work - never. We didn't communicate anything unrelated to work on work computers or really even talk inappropriately at work even in private. It also really meant we couldn't have any close friendships with coworkers, since we basically had to lie to everyone about our relationship.
Worth it. We have a few kids now and risking my job to date and marry him was 1000 times worth it. He says the same. I don't think it's "immoral" to fall in love with your boss / subordinate and follow your heart. Unprofessional - definitely. Risky - 100%. But quite possibly worth it.
The original poster should probably wait six months and make sure he and this woman really have a connection. But people are so uptight. Real life is messy but it can be wonderful.
In 1985, I made a hurried move from Boston to Chicago to take over running a small company. I was single and 42. A woman that worked for me part-time, I promoted her to full-time and and seeing her all day, we started talking a lot after work hours. It was not long after, we started going out and I could see it was going to be a problem in the workplace but fate intervened. She went out of her way on a weekend to help another company with a rush import and they offered her a job which she took. With the workplace pressure off, we continued our relationship and I married her. I knew right off that she was the best I was ever going to meet. I was a spender and she was a saver. She made me a saver and an investor. In short, the best thing that ever happened to me. Flash to 2022, still married, and retired. So it can work under the right circumstances.
I'm a manager, and one of my employees is a bit younger than me, and there is a lot of sexual tension when we're physically close to one another. I know she feels it too because she has on multiple occasions leaned forward near me for fairly extended periods of time giving me a clear view down her shirt. She even looks away and pretends to be preoccupied with something so I can stare. So far I've been keeping my distance and have remained professional, but this has got me thinking, is it even possible in 2022 for a male boss to have sexual relations with one of his employees without risking getting fired? Seems like it's just a total no-go zone for anyone who values their job.
Never date your co-workers, neighbors, or people in fairly small groups or clubs (such as a running group). Think ahead, not that many people you meet and date end up being long term relationships. Think about how awkward it will become after you stop dating, yet, are still tied to this person through the group, work, or seeing them constantly as a neighbor. And if it was not a good breakup this multiplies the awkwardness tenfold. I have been there. Not fun.
If you are Steve Wynn or one of the other oligarchs you can sexully assault numerous women over decades and never face any criminal charges nor lose ownership of your company
Use extreme caution. I know of one guy in my company that dated a subordinate and she reported him to HR for sexual harassment. Regardless of whether true or not he lost his job over it
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