My Son Ryan Shay

Dear Joe,

On behalf of Gary Stoner's family we express our deepest sympathy for your loss. We will never forget Ryan's and your kind words at my uncle Gary's funeral. You touched us all very deeply. I am sure Gary would be just heartbroken.

Fondly,

Sheryl Farrell daughter of Mary Lou Paeglis

Joe-

I had the chance to run on a team with Ryan at those AAU National meets in high school. I'll never forget the those few long van trips when I got to know him on a personal level. Ever since, I always got a sense of pride seeing him race on the national scene, knowing that he came from the same part of N. Michigan as I. He has and will continue to be an inspiration to us all. Please know that the thoughts and prayers of the Traverse City Cross Country family are with you and the entire Shay family. God bless.

-Joe A.

Three times in my life, I've been momentarily jolted into thinking a news item or even something unfolding in the present was a joke done in catastrophically poor taste. The first was when the Space Shuttle Challenger was destroyed with one of my school's teachers on board. The second was seeing reports that Princess Di had died. The third was loading the NYRR page on Saturday afternoon and learning about Ryan. I thought, or perhaps just hoped like hell, that terrible paragraph at the top was the result of a server hacking.

I guess at some level the truth was a little too much, and it still is.

I spoke with Ryan once. It was at some length, for a Running Times profile over four years ago, not long after he'd won the national marathon championship. Having done a few of these, it was clear that Ryan was an unassuming guy, more interested in talking about, well, running and racing (he asked me repeatedly about my own) than in fulfilling an obligation or taking care to offer duly canned and optimistic answers. He had to be this way; nothing came as easily to him as it perhaps does for others at his level or the level he was determined to reach. He knew flat-out hard work had gotten him a whiff at the top, but he loved to work, so he was very much thrilled by the opportunity to do something he loved.

Ryan was plainly a runner's runner. All discussions of top runners in places like this inevitably morph into moot arguments about innate talent levels and questions about athletes' choice of coaches, stretegies, training approaches. But I don't know anyone familiar with Ryan or his accomplishments who ever questioned that he was doing the right thing, the right way, or who couldn't identify with him and see him as a peer.

If there's any redemption in any of this, it's watching the way the modest-sized running community works at its heart, with so many of its luminaries on fintimate terms with people who in other realms might be bitter rivals. I'm proud to be a runner today, and sad for opportunities any of us may have missed along the way. We still have a chance.

Kevin Beck

We will keep you and your family in our prayers. Prayers for peace, strength, and courage as you walk this difficult road.

Mr. Shay,

Your son is an inspiration to me and was a great champion.

Jeff Gill

I had the pleasure of attending the NCAA meet in Eugene where Ryan won the 10,000m. At the time I was familiar with his name, but didn't know much about him. When he broke away early I thought "This guy is crazy to think he's going to run away from the field for 25 laps." By the end of the race, I was no longer thinking he was crazy, only tough and a great competitor. The running community has suffered a large loss. My thoughts and prayers are with the Shay family.

The Shay Family,

During my time at Providence College I had 4 years of competition against Ryan. In many ways it was a rivalry with all the big east events we raced in. My last race in a PC shirt was in Oregon at the NCAA champs that Ryan won. And it was after that race that I had my first real conversation with Ryan over a beer. I guess we were no longer rivals and we laughed about some of the close battles and bitter staredowns we had! I met Ryan many times at events all over the country since and he represented himself and his family with all the integrity and honor an athlete can have. He was a fierce competitor and it was never an easy day when he was on the line. I was in NYC this weekend and it is still a shock to everyone in the running community. I am so sorry for your loss. He will be missed on the circut but he was a Son, Brother, and Husband first and all my thoughts go out to your family and the Craig family during this time.

Keith

My thoughts and prayers have been with you and the rest of the Shay family.

Ryan was a great runner and an even greater person. God bless Ryan and the the entire Shay family. May they find strength in knowing that Ryan is with God and will meet again.

Tom Miller

Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

My prayer and thoughts go out to the Shay family. May you find strength in knowing that Ryan was an inspiration to many.

I was on the plane Friday with Alicia's parents, out of Rapid City. They of course were on their way to NYC. I was on my way to another marathon and Mr. Craig could see I'm a runner from my shirt, jacket, reading material, etc., so struck up a conversation with me. It was so clear how very proud he and Mrs. Craig are of both Alicia and Ryan, and how excited they were to share in Ryan's triumph of going to the trials as a real contender. Please accept my condolences and convey them to the Craigs as well. God bless you all and give you strength.

I am truly sorry for your loss. I had followed Ryan's career as part of the resurgance of American distance running. He was inspirational to younger runners and to an old goat like me too. He will be missed.

Matt

Mr. Shay, I was deeply saddened to hear about Ryan's sudden and unexpected passing. Ryan's death is a reminder to all of us that we are tenants, not owners, of life on this earth, and that we know not the day nor the hour when our earthly lease will expire. Every day is a gift, and we should never take that gift for granted.

A few weeks ago, I had the pleasure of meeting Billy Mills, the Olympic 10,000 meters champion at the 1964 Tokyo Summer Olympics. Billy is a deeply spiritual person. His father died when Billy was 12. Billy's father believed in the gift of life and once told Billy, "My life is a gift to me from my Creator, and what I do with my life is my gift back to the Creator."

Your son's candle was snuffed out before anyone expected it to burn out, but you can take pride in knowing that his life was a gift back to his Creator and to all of us who survive him. Ryan's passing serves as an inspiration to all to continue striving everyday with the talents that have been given to us and to love and help each other. In so doing, we, like Ryan, make our lives our gift back to the Creator.

The constellation of America's elite distance runners shines with one less star today. The Lord has called Ryan home. The official results from the race on Saturday will show that Ryan did not finish, but he really did finish. It's just that the finish line was in heaven, and not in Central Park.

May God bless you and comfort you and your family and Alicia in this time of sadness. You will all be in my thoughts and prayers.

Our thoughts and prayers are with you. Ryan was a great inspiration, and a great human being.

My thoughts and prays go out to the family. I watched Ryans career and thought the kid had a awesome shot at doing special things not only on Saturday but in the future. My immediate thought when I learned of his passing was Jeff Drenth's death back in the 80's. Shocking and just as sudden not to mention the Michigan link.

I'm not a religious person, so I suppose I can't offer my prayers.

I've never met Ryan.

Can't say I watched his career closely though I certainly knew of him.

But he and his family are all I've thought about during my runs the last few days. Hope that means something if anything.

My heart goes out to you. Saturday was to be a joyous day with my three favorite top runners competing...Hall, Shay and Sell. We traveled to NYC to see the Trials with my 16 year old son who follows these guys almost as much as myself. We will remember him always as one of the best.

I'm truly sorry for your family's loss. Something tells me that Ryan has no regrets about the choices he made in life - he passed on doing what he loved most. God bless him.

Do not stand at my grave and weep,

I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow.

I am the diamond glint on snow.

I am the sunlight on ripened grain.

I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you wake in the morning hush,

I am the swift, uplifting rush

Of quiet birds in circling flight.

I am the soft starlight at night.

Do not stand at my grave and weep.

I am not there, I do not sleep.

Do not stand at my grave and cry.

I am not there, I did not die.

Your son was an inspiration to many many people, including me personally. He will be dearly missed.