Thrown at

haha, Mr. Chest, it would be great if you came and tried that with me...I'm one of those little runners that loves to beat the piss outta big guys like yourself. The best part is you guys never see it coming cuz your so big and muscular and stupid...all of a sudden, I'm kicking the living snot out of you, I love it. Hope to see you on the roads!

Some redneck oxygen thief hit me with a full can of Coors Light. It was during a local "festival" so there was a lot of traffic. I retrieved the can, caught up to the pickup which was stuck in traffic and launched the 12oz missile through his backglass. God knows how big the bastard was so I bolted!!! I was laughing so hard I could barely run. He probably had to spend a full day digging ditches to pay for that one.

Dirty Dan wrote:

haha, Mr. Chest, it would be great if you came and tried that with me...I'm one of those little runners that loves to beat the piss outta big guys like yourself. The best part is you guys never see it coming cuz your so big and muscular and stupid...all of a sudden, I'm kicking the living snot out of you, I love it. Hope to see you on the roads!

You're one of those little runts who used to get his butt kicked on they school playground and get his lunch money taken away from him. You've never beat anyone up, not even your sister. Mr. Chest laughs at you and puny little runners who dare to take on the likes of Mr. Chest.

Time to take a drive. In your honor, I'll inflict more pain than usual on the first runner who is stupid enough to yell at Mr. Chest. Ha ha hahaha.

Hey, Mr. Chest!!!

alright I am the first runner to yell at you. Whatcha gonna do? hahhahahahaha

Funny Wrote:

"When did you become an angry homophobe? If you aren't, then why did you get mad when someone suggested you were gay? Idiot."

Do I know you? And for the record, I objected more to the use of the slur fag then being called homosexual.

Besides the usual beer bottles, I once had a size D battery thrown at me. Fortunately, it hit the fence behind me.

Oooooohhh! Size D! Never thought they would be so mean.

That last post by Dirty Dan might have been the funniest thing I've ever read here. I'm still hurting.

Newspaper guy throws the paper at me every morning 6 AM. I don't know what I did to piss him off - must not be tipping him enough.

did you ever stop to think maybe he wasn't throwing it AT you, but maybe since your so fat and hence, take up so much space, the paper boy couldn't help but hit you?

I call that my "broad side of a barn" theory

Once had a kid in the passenger side of an SUV chuck a super big gulp at me and my buddy. Didnt hurt, but covered us both with sticky soda. I flipped out and sprinted to catch them (two smooth looking 16 yr olds with their girlfriends in the back seat) at the next light (middle of Tucson , AZ).

The kid sees me coming and frantically hits the button for the electric window. I grab the top of the window and try my hardest to break it off, having to give up just as my fingers were about to be crushed. I then moved to the antennae, which i found quite easy to bend over in half. After that I grabbed the side view mirror and tried in vain to rip it off, whil simultaneously kicking dents in the door. By this time the two chicks are staring in sheer horror, and the driver is screaming "Stop!! It's my car, I didnt do anything to you!!" So I yell "Then throw this guy out of your car!" pointing to the passenger. The driver starts shoving the pasenger, and saying something like "Vato, you got to get out, take it like a man." The passenger begs for mercy from the driver, and after I kick three or four more dents in the SUV, the light changes and they peel off.

I doubt they ever threw anything at a runner again. Or maybe they combed the streets of Tucson for me for the next few years with a gat under the front seat. I dunno, I moved away from that cesspool.

To this day, my buddy thinks I have anger management problems.

Mr. Chest,

I hope you look something like this dumb bastard:

http://www.flexonline.com/flex/breaking_news/12_06_02/levrone_to.html

that would make my kicking your ass all that more enjoyable!

Of course, talking tough behind a computer is all you can do. It shows how insecure and pathetic your puny, bony little ass really is. Tell you what, tough guy. Go to the gym today and pick a fight with somone who looks like mr chest. Maybe you'll get lucky and actually get your dream of meeting mr chest. Even if you don't, the outcome will be the same. Another runt runner will be slammed to the ground and stepped on like the piece of shit he really is.

Ha ha hahahaha.

Mr. Chest, I would remind you that YOU were the one that instigated this dispute, and granted, I'm guilty of prolonging it, YOU are hiding behind a computer screen also...Now, as far as the gym thing goes...I would love to do that, and I've tried before, but I have a reputation amongst the local gym's as "the skinny runner guy who comes in and kicks the snot out of big muscle heads" (in fact, I even wear a shirt that says that into their weightroom) so noone will really stand up to me. Maybe its my size 15 Asics 740 (right foot) they dont want in their ass, but whatever it is, they generally drop the dead weights, unstrap their weight belts and clear the area when I drop by to ride the fitness bike. To promote further conflict, I'll even walk in with my short split-hip racing shorts in an attempt to illicit responses like "fag" and "homo" but its just not working anymore. Maybe you could give me some pointers on walking in and really firing up the crowd?

In this forum, I am fat (5'8", 150 lbs.). In real life, people tell me I need to put on weight. Seriously, though, try running in the morning. In my opinion, there's fewer car loads of cement heads driving around at 6AM.

The reputation you have is the puny little runt who gets his ass kicked and his milk money taken away. I bet you also have the reputation of "being used and abused and passed around by your running 'buddies' like a bottle of Schnapps at prom."

The more you talk, the more insecurities you show you have. You'll never be like mr chest. Don't set your goals too high, son; you'll only lead yourself to more disappointment and more insecurities. It must be tough dealing with having a frail and weak body, knowing that your sister used to beat the hell out of you. You go to thy gym because you admire the mr chest types. You want to be like them, but you can't. So, you go there and stare at them, dreaming of seducing one like you do your gay running buddies. Everyone knows that you little runners age gay. That's why you get called queers when you run in your little gay, split racing shorts. No one calls mr chest gay. The ladies just call him to pleasure them.

No run along and get in your run. Flex those big guns of yours along the way so you can scare everyone off. Ha ha ha hahahaha.

Hey MR BREAST

Go back to flex world play with your breast pump. Either that or start hanging out with some running studs and run that excess $hit you call muscle off Titty Boy.

I see that many of you are fixated with mr chest. That is understandable. You all want to be like me. You will never make it. A puny little runt who can't get a girlfriend is all you are and all you ever will be. Ha ha ha hahahaha.

Are we to believe there really is a "Mr. Chest"? What are the odds of that? Real bodybuilders are all too busy posing in front of full length mirrors, trying to figure out how they're going to fully extend their musclebound arms, or examining their shriveled, Lilliputian genitals with magnifying glasses to bother taunting runners on an Internet message board.

If, however, "Mr. Chest" is a real entity, as I mentioned in another thread, it's most likely the grotesque hybrid offspring of a demented, incessantly gibbering chimp and a surprisingly stupid sasquatch - more a secret, controversial genetic experiment gone horribly awry than a man. The poor creature deserves our pity rather than our ridicule. I say we ignore it completely and hopefully it will drag its hairy knuckles back to the Sulphur River Bottoms from whence it came, where others of its kind lurk undiscovered amidst the moss-covered undergrowth.