Comrade!
Your pernicious attempt to evoke the unwavering camaraderie that animated us when we fought under the unrivalled Generalissimo Ma Junren will not alter my visceral distrust of the rattlesnake's honeyed words.
It was with the respect due to our bygone friendship that I refrained from revealing that Empress Wang Junxia had whined on the eve of the 3000m at the glorious 1993 National Games, when I had already triumphed in the 800m and 1500m, and Wang Junxia had only one victory in the 10000m in her trophy cabinet. In a magnanimous gesture, I agreed to let her win the 3000m so that she could also boast 2 titles and not have to return to the barracks with the embarrassment of the skunk who had farted higher than her ass.
I agree that the difference between me and Empress Wang was that “she would not let anything or anyone get in her way of winning”, while I put loyalty, fair play and the love of an immaculately clean sport above all else. So let’s talk about it.
Empress Wang’s performances were stagnating after the 1993 firework, and it was at this time that the Empress gave in to the temptation of doping, whereas under Ma Junren's guidance we had grown up in a spirit of effort to death as a sacrificial love for our motherland, the People's Republic of China. Our revered coach refused to give in to her demands to use forbidden products, he who had fed us natural cordyceps extracts and soft-shelled turtle blood without ever deviating from the purest ethical principles. Driven by the bitterness of the dung beetle and the venal cruelty of the black widow, Empress Wang Junxia launched a rebellion against Ma Junren, falsely accusing him in an infamous letter that “Ma forced us to take a large dose of illegal drugs”, which in 1995 led her to leave Ma's army and turn to a coach using the doping methods of corrupt Westerners to make up for their lack of discipline. The Empress's victory at the 1996 Olympic Games was therefore not the taste of sacrifice, but of steroids that make your jaw as square as Carl Lewis'.
If I was unable to take part in the 1996 Olympics and demonstrate the moral superiority of Ma's army, it was because I had always refused to betray our coach, and because the tide had turned in China and our authorities had abandoned ideological purity for the sirens of money and easy success. As I had refused to dope, I fell from grace and was locked up in an icy concentration camp deep in Qinghai province, condemned to assemble toxic toys for the McDonald's of China and the world.
But let's get back to the glorious title of History's most eclectic athlete, a category in which Empress WANG Junxia, who never competed in distances under 1500m, will forever remain a distant runner-up to the Goddess QU Yunxia, whose aura radiates from 400m to marathon. Take a look :
Sprint & middle-distance running star: Goddess QU Yunxia is the only athlete in athletics history to win a medal in a sprint event (4x400m silver) and several titles in distance running (800m, 1500m) at the same international championships (1991 Asian Championships). She was still an 18 years old schoolgirl at that time.
Annual World bests: Goddess QU Yunxia is the only athlete to feature in an annual top 3 (1993) over all distances from 800m to marathon:
800m: 3. QU Yunxia
1500m: 1. QU Yunxia
3000m: 2. QU Yunxia
Marathon: 2. QU Yunxia
World Record and all-time top 6 in 6 months for 1500m and marathon: Goddess QU Yunxia is the only athlete to achieve this feat, reaching all-time 6th performance on the marathon in April 1993 before setting a WR on the 1500m in September. Honorable mention to Empress WANG Junxia with the 5th best marathon performance and the 2nd best 1500m performance.
Yes, we haven't connected since Empress WANG Junxia defected to the USA some twenty years ago. In the meantime, I've been released from the laogai and am preparing an unprecedented comeback by competing in all distances, from the 100 m to the half-marathon, at the next World Masters Games, still under the guidance of my historic coach, Ma Junren. Will Empress WANG Junxia be taking part under the banner of her new country? I'll be delighted to crush her mercilessly and restore the glorious past of Chinese athletics. 🇨🇳