No offense but you've got a boat load of issues yourself here. Neglectful parents, low self-esteem about yourself, peer group problems, abusive relationships, social media scrolling, anxiety about your life. All sounds interconnected. Try and get these ducks in a row first.
No offense but you've got a boat load of issues yourself here. Neglectful parents, low self-esteem about yourself, peer group problems, abusive relationships, social media scrolling, anxiety about your life. All sounds interconnected. Try and get these ducks in a row first.
Yes and no. Definitely developed a better sense of human depth from the interstate ex-gf incident (holy sh*t that was taxing). I dont know if that is making me too reserved, picky and judgmental when evaluating partners.
I am controlled and aware of the social media scrolling thing. Always have been heavily moderated but once in a while I still end up doing it.
Anxiety, yes. That's a given. I try not to look back at my experiences with parents and let it effect me. But it will always be there.
I definitely think I have been people pleasing for longer than I have been aware which has been a huge recent revelation to me and perhaps acting as vulnerability on the social front.
No offense but you've got a boat load of issues yourself here. Neglectful parents, low self-esteem about yourself, peer group problems, abusive relationships, social media scrolling, anxiety about your life. All sounds interconnected. Try and get these ducks in a row first.
I agree. And his previous post reads like someone that is getting close, but hasn't quite grappled completely with an important concept, life is ultimately meaningless. I don't mean that in any kind of negative or depressive way, and I honestly mean that. But we get told throughout our formative years, through college and as an early adult, that this all adds up to something. Something grand that provides a feeling up nirvana, or as close as one can expect here on earth.
The truth is with the exception of those that are truly delusional, life is about being happy enough to make it through the day and be thankful you at least have that. An that's ok! That's the most important part, you have to be ok with that. Otherwise, your expectations get so unrealistic you end up like yourself. Forty years old thinking it's going to get significantly better. And I hate to be the bearer of bad news, it doesn't. So enjoy what you have, while you have it.
I wish that wasn't the case, but that's about what all we can expect from life. Some of us have gone through the process of realizing that. So when we go run a stupid race, attend a stupid kids soccer game, hangout at a stupid happy hour, we don't kid ourselves into thinking we're chasing some feeling of happiness or belonging. We're just doing our best to enjoy what we have while we have it.
40s are great, still have 95% of running ability and probably the intellectual peak for most of us, old enough to know better, young enough to still learn things and work hard. No running PRs in my 40s but set all my triathlon PRs then, after learning how to ride a bike faster.
Guess you are not a very good runner. Most runners look forward to entering the master division.
Ahhh, the masters division. New categories to change the metrics of success because we can no longer find the success we had before starting to physically decline more rapidly. That is a healthy way to deal with aging.
Most masters runners at races who are still awkward and nervous like teenagers, who feel that running is their identity and obviously cannot give it up. It's a sad bunch doing a sport I've always loved. When I was younger it was easy to avoid them but now I avoid them even more, even since turning 40.
cheer up. there's a lot more to dread in the future. your 50's and 60's. and if you live to be 70+, you can look forward to crapping your pants and having to live in a nursing home because you pee the bed and can't remember what you did 5 minutes ago.
The drop off from 39 to 40 is a drop in the bucket compared to what is waiting you by the time you hit your late 50's. Every year starts to matter by then.
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