If a guy is very wealthy, should he hide this when he first starts dating a woman?

$120,000. is a lot of money? Doesn’t it depend on where in the U.S. one lives?

And, if is the salary at age 25 or so, that’s really not too bad in any US metro area….

$120k puts you in the top 20% of earners in the US.

Anyone saying that $120k at 25 is just "pretty good" or "okay" is delusional.

The average salary for someone living in NYC is $114k and this average includes the bajillionaires skewing the average upwards.

Have read through the thread and am kind of chuckling/shaking my head so many people are supposedly scoffing at $120k/year... I live in middle America and make about $70k/year, and I have enough money to do basically whatever I want. I don't live a crazy lifestyle, but I eat out as much as I want, take one trip abroad each year, drive a decent car, and still put away between $1000 and $2000 each month towards my investments. I make more money than most of the women here my age, and the main ones who are making more than me are in the medical field... One I dated for awhile did make significantly more than me as she was a specialized nurse of some kind, but she also worked a lot of 12hr night shifts and weekends. To each their own, but that lifestyle sucks.

Even here, I wouldn't consider $120k/year "rich," but it would absolutely be enough for any sensible person to have basically anything they want and live extremely comfortably as long as they're not very foolish with their money. Especially if you're savvy with investing, earning that much and putting some away into a broad market index fund could easily lead to "earning" over $200k/year between income and investments in a pretty short period of time. That is enough that more doesn't even make any difference in my opinion (unless your life dream is to buy an island or something).

Typical letsrun.

Only if you date unemployed women or women who work in low, status jobs. Otherwise your date is going to think you're a bum. She will likely think you're an idiot anyway if you start talking about salary figures in a first date. At best, she'll think you really insecure.

Hide it? No. But he definitely shouldn't go out of his way to flaunt it. Ultimately, money is nice but it is not the foundation of a high quality, long term, romantic relationship. When it comes to finances, living below your means is the ticket to contentedness. And you want your mate to be the same way.

I think the op makes a valid point, but to really flesh it out:

Gorgeous women should hide their beauty

Tall guys should hide their height

Intelligent people should act otherwise

Young folks should die their hair gray

etc, etc, etc

Basically all women are easy to read. So it's relatively simple to discover what kind of person they are with limited interaction. They think they can hide their selfish intentions--the ones who are selfish, but it's really ao obvious. The difficulty for a high value man is sometimes he can fall into a trap of thinking with his D instead of with his head. A sexy and captivating woman can weaken a man into a state of figurative mental retardation.

Let’s look at living in Manhattan on 120k. Say you max out your 401k and that’s the only money you save every month. So you’re at 97.5k annually after 401k. Your take home after federal, state, FICA, and local taxes is about $5300 per month (deducted another $100 per month for health insurance premium). The average one bedroom is a bit over $4000, but say you’re okay with slumming it a bit and can get one for $3500. That leaves $1800/month for all your food, transportation, clothes, phone and utilities, health expenditures, and any travel or leisure activities. I would say that’s a pretty meager existence for an adult living in NYC.

I don't know if you have your facts exactly right, but I can tell you this...I wouldn't want to be living in NYC making only $120k, and I know how to live extremely frugally. Nothing snobby about that at all.

Hide what?

If a girl is interested in money, she isn’t going to be going out with a guy who makes $120k, unless maybe he make 120k as a resident doctor or some other career that is going to ensure high earning later.

Nothing wrong with 120k, but it isn’t the kind of money you need to worry about gold diggers with.

As a general rule, don’t flash or show wealth, unless it is something you truly enjoy doing.

The facts are exactly right.

If you can't live comfortably on $120,000 as a single person lack of frugality is the least of your problems.

No.

But you should be dating a woman who is on your level financially. Have your parents set you up with the daughters of some of the people they hang with. Or date in your professional circle (not people at your office).

Arranged marriages tend to work out because there is so much support and similarities between the parties.

first you should never speak directly about money, your wealth will be revealed by your lifestyle and actions... taking about money is bragging and never a good look..

second is the question, what you are looking for ?

Are you looking for something quick or something permament ?

Quick - I would say you need to sell what ever the lady is looking for....

Long term - I would say you should just let them take part in your normal life, which will reveal your wealth over time (financial or other wealth)

third what are they looking for ? Behaviour and not words is the one thing to pay attention to...

fourth: dont get married in Vegas on a whim to an exotic dancer...

I've spent over 40 years living in NYC, the last 20 married with kids. My wife and I never netted more than 90,000 until very recently. You're correct, if you can't live comfortably on $120,000 (and invest) something is wrong.

I should have mentioned that I've lived in the outer boros since I've been married. My brother spends $6,500 a month rent living in lower Manhattan. Yes he makes 2 to 3 times more a year than I ever did but he wastes it on rent. He could pay off a nice co-op in a great area in Queens for 5 years of his rent.

Girls that date men for their wealth are called prostitutes.

If you’re looking for a wife then tell women you make 50k a year.

If you’re looking for a hookup then pretend to be a billionaire.

In general, women are attracted to men who can provide security.

This means big men and rich men are more desirable than little and poor men to most women.

There are exceptions but for the most part this rule holds true.

That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever read.

No you don’t, if you had enough money to do whatever you want you wouldn’t choose to live in middle America, no one would.