A guy asked me if I want to grab coffee: is he implying a date? How do I gently try to confirm if it's only a friend thing?

He doesn't mean coffee, he means his junk. Do you wanna grab his junk?

Any time a guy asks to do anything with you, he’s basically saying “I’d eventually like to have sex with you.”

It’s quite simple actually.

If you were a dude, I would say ask if he would like a fish sandwich instead of coffee.

Since you are a lady, watch the montage in "Coming To America" where Eddie and Arsenio are meeting single women in a bar, and they all have "deal-breaker" lines to say like: "I'm almost single. . . My husband is on death row!"

You shouldn't be getting coffee with this guy even if you were single. Entrepreneurs and start-up employees are often some of the most annoying people in the world.

If I was you, I'd just go on the coffee date. Talk about how coffee originated from Ethiopia, the same country as Bekele. This will be your chance to start talk about Bekele. Tell him how much you admire Bekele, and he will get jealous. Make sure you are wearing a Bekele t shirt(I have a vest with Bekele on it, which I wear everyday). Show him loads of pictures of Bekele on your phone. He will leave you alone, knowing that he can't compete with the greatest person on earth.

Drink your coffee fast, but be nice and order a slice of banana bread, and share it with him. Say something really witty as he puts it into his mouth so he starts choking. Something like "Knock knock, who's there, wada, wa da na you". Shout "gobble gobble mf", and get up and leave.

The Honest to God Truth wrote:

Any time a guy asks to do anything with you, he’s basically saying “I’d eventually like to have sex with you.”

It’s quite simple actually.

I hope your boyfriend likes coffee. Cream and sugar, please.

It's 2018. Nobody would think twice about a chic who's banging several dudes on the side. Just don't be a jerk about it.

What were you wearing? You brought this on yourself . Deal with it yourself.

Americans are such kids. I have several female friends with whom I also go to the cinema or climbing. Only americans have to f..uck (americans lover censoring) anything they see.

Americans are such kids. I have several female friends with whom I also go to the cinema or climbing. Only americans have to f..uck (americans lover censoring) anything they see.

Is OP update?

confused runner chick wrote:

Update: My boyfriend and I made sure to be extra noisy during our weekly pegging session. We were so loud I'm sure that the could new guy could hear us through the floor and walls. Message sent :)

I'm glad I could loosen him up for you.

The actual OP here with an update:

I messaged the coffee guy and told him I was busy the weekend (I actually was) but maybe some other time. He said sure, let me know and we can plan something.

Also talked to my boyfriend who trusts me and knows I'm not going to do anything with this guy (which I absolutely am not). We thought also that he could come over sometime this week (as I said earlier, I usually go over to his place). And if we ran into coffee guy, I could then also tell coffee guy we could go get coffee sometime but use "we" to include both my boyfriend and I.

All in all, it was fine. Sorry I don't have more drama for you Letsrun.

Typically when I ask out a chick I will have a throbbing erection... we’re his pants sticking up when he asked u ?

I ended up agreeing to drop buy his place to watch Westworld, figured it was only one episode so safer than a movie and could make clean exit early.

But things got weird.

Like, really weird.

why do you guys have to be so fu#$ing strategic and tactical about it? Just ask him "hey I hate to be presumptuous but are you asking me out on a date or just to hang out?" If it's the former, then just say sorry but I'm in a relationship. Done, end of story and no bullsh!t or slipping in "my BOYFRIEND and I would love to come." It's really not that difficult

lksm;lf,';sdf wrote:

why do you guys have to be so fu#$ing strategic and tactical about it? Just ask him "hey I hate to be presumptuous but are you asking me out on a date or just to hang out?" If it's the former, then just say sorry but I'm in a relationship. Done, end of story and no bullsh!t or slipping in "my BOYFRIEND and I would love to come." It's really not that difficult

Because she is either monkey branching for a future relationship, or else seeking a beta orbiter to extract resources from.

A womanly woman wrote:

confused runner chick wrote:

I don't want to be presumptuous and also make it awkward in the future when I talk to him, since we technically live in the same joined house and I might run into him again.

I'm thinking of saying I am not available this weekend... would it be overkill to add something about my boyfriend (it would be unnecessary), or better to just not suggest an alternative time?

As a fellow woman, I feel your pain. One thing that has worked for me in these situations is to mention that I am transgender( I an not). Most men tend to back off then.

Why lie? Just say you have a boyfriend. You never know in a few months you and the BF might break up and then you might be interested.