Anyone frozen their sperm? How much does it cost and could I write it off as a tax break if I go to Rio?

rojo wrote:

If I do go, I was thinknig of freezing my sperm as I'd like to start a family soon. Does anyone know where the hell you'd go to do that, how much would it cost and could I write it off as a business expense?

Somewhere cold. Wait for the Winter Olympics..

1) Zika only stays in your sperm for 8 weeks. Are you planning to start a family that soon?

2) Have you heard of google? The price and where to go would be immediately answered.

3) I can't believe you scammed somebody into giving you a press credential for Rio. I guess it helps that the person in charge of press credentials probably speaks Portuguese and very little English, so they weren't able to discern your terrible reporting skills.

4) Please don't have children.

Write off the Olympic Games as a business expense--yes

Write off having children as a business expense-only if you are raising them to test PEDs on.

rojo wrote:

So I've got a press credential for Rio and am looking into going down there.

I've also contemplated just staying home as we get things done better if we have one person covering the event remotely (someone needs to recap and analayze why the others interview). When you add in the fact that that it costs a ton to go down there and terrorism and Zika are both concerns of mine, then you can see why I might stay.

If I do go, I was thinknig of freezing my sperm as I'd like to start a family soon. Does anyone know where the hell you'd go to do that, how much would it cost and could I write it off as a business expense?

Business law is legal framework around very human matters. You are certainly valid in believing that it is write off able as a business expense and in both financial accounting for your business and other record keeping, that this is serious and formally valid.

I watched a bit of the subcommittee meeting on Zika, in this time of political change and it seems to me it could be even worse than Ebola.

The "where" question I have no idea and am curious myself.

The business and law question is one for

your accountant (who should answer yes),

For your Financial advisor

(Decisions and strategy regarding Insurance, Risk, Optionalities, Assets)

And possibly a lawyer of some kind.

Getting advice on a good sperm bank id imagine lies at the intersection of knowing interesting people, famous and rich people, and getting advice based on your needs and situation (elite athlete, family and gene planning, risk and financial consulting and perspectives, etc). So you may need not only a sperm bank expert but smart financial thinker rich guys and elite athletes who also have review consumer information and perspectives for sperm bank use.

It's a tall order. Is there an idiots guide or textbook out there on this? Much less an advanced textbook? That you will need to progress to for your level of needs going forward in the future.

As mentioned above, Zika is only in your system for a short period of time. There are a lot of other diseases I would be more concerned about (from yellow fever and malaria to chikungunya, typhoid and hepatitis). Just make sure to bring lots of DEET, wear long clothes and avoid tap water, fruits and vegetables you can't peal yourself and street food. Oh and stay out of the favelas.

Make those creampies before you go to Rio. Problem solved.

Shoot a few loads in your ice cube tray just in case.

What's the big deal with Zika anyway. Worst case scenario, you have kids who need smaller hats, which totally saves you $.

Droppin Loads wrote:

Make those creampies before you go to Rio. Problem solved.

Shoot a few loads in your ice cube tray just in case.

Yep, this method won't cost you hardly anything.

Be sure to sterilize the ice cube tray before you load it up. If it has been a while you may want to get two ice cube trays just in case the first one over flows. You certainly don't want to waste any of those fish.

One other thing. You'll need to get a turkey baster to use for the insertion if you ever find willing surrogates.

Dude! If you get zika you can have your 100% genetic match finish off the job.

You could wear a body condom to prevent getting mosquito bites since mosquito repellent hasn't been invented yet.

One word: DEET

sdfsdfsdfsdfsdfsdf wrote:

1) Zika only stays in your sperm for 8 weeks. Are you planning to start a family that soon?

2) Have you heard of google? The price and where to go would be immediately answered.

3) I can't believe you scammed somebody into giving you a press credential for Rio. I guess it helps that the person in charge of press credentials probably speaks Portuguese and very little English, so they weren't able to discern your terrible reporting skills.

4) Please don't have children.

1) Yes but my doctor told me in February that it wasn't even proven you could give it via sperm. So it's clear to me people doctors don't know 100% for sure.

2) Yes, I"ve heard of google. I run a website. I wanted someone who has done it before to offer their opinion. Intermet marketers are veyr clever. If we used a computer for everything, there would be no need to talk to anyone. I'd rather trust a human than some internet ad.

3) Terrible reporting skills? Please elaborate.

4) You are an ***

Yeah, I agree with the poster above...you're really one of the stupidest people around, definitely in the bottom 1% of trust-fund Ivy grads. You should not reproduce. At least your brother was smart enough to dope his way to national class but you didn't even have that much gumption.

Flounder wrote:

One other thing. You'll need to get a turkey baster to use for the insertion if you ever find willing surrogates.

If you don't want to buy a Turkey baster, you could insert the frozen cubes and have her hang upside down while they melt.

One time in Minnesota on a really cold winter run I thought I did.

useless expense wrote:

Flounder wrote:

One other thing. You'll need to get a turkey baster to use for the insertion if you ever find willing surrogates.

If you don't want to buy a Turkey baster, you could insert the frozen cubes and have her hang upside down while they melt.

Picture a torture chamber with a line of olympic volley ball athletes, still in uniform and hung up side down in chains while Rojo walks down the line holding an ice bucket and tongs.

1) CDC website. Check it out. You are right that the information is evolving, but while nothing in life can be known for certain, the CDC errs on the side of being conservative, so we can probably put some faith into their suggestion of 8 weeks.

2) Fair enough. Although you are using a computer to "talk" to people in this case...

3) Ok, I will elaborate. Read your two posts in this thread for examples of your tenuous grasp of the English language. If you're not seeing it, copy and paste into word so that the squiggly red lines appear. Then go and read your own articles. My high school newspaper had better reporting, at least in terms of proper word choice, clarity of writing, and grammar.

Of course, I'm actually thankful to have any coverage of this sport, I just wish you had better writing skills, but that is easy enough to overlook.

The bigger issue is that you feel the need to inconsistently throw in your own agenda against specific runners for doping/internal testes/you not liking their personality, etc, but not against others.

4) Fair enough, that was rude and unhelpful. I take that back. Please limit it to two kids though. Not because of my or anybody's opinion of you, but I think everybody should limit themselves to two children or we are setting our children up to inherit a world even more over populated than it already is. I plan to only have two. I don't judge people for having unexpected twins though and ending up with 3 as a result.

Don't worry, I gotchu.

rojo wrote:

So I've got a press credential for Rio and am looking into going down there.

I've also contemplated just staying home as we get things done better if we have one person covering the event remotely (someone needs to recap and analayze why the others interview). When you add in the fact that that it costs a ton to go down there and terrorism and Zika are both concerns of mine, then you can see why I might stay.

If I do go, I was thinknig of freezing my sperm as I'd like to start a family soon. Does anyone know where the hell you'd go to do that, how much would it cost and could I write it off as a business expense?

Terrorism? Get a grip man.

Use an eyedropper not a turkey baster, otherwise she may PNSO.