I started dating a girl not too long ago, and past relationships came up in conversation. I told her I'd dated a lot but only been in three significant relationships, each of which lasted about 9 months (I'm the one who ended the relationship in each of the three cases). She acted like this was very strange, and it got me thinking about it and how I'm perceived to other people.
Nah, I'd say the fact you're seeking advice from seething misogynist basement trolls is a bigger red flag.
No. It is well within the realm of possible random chance. A bigger red flag in my opinion would be if you went from one 3 or 4 relationship to the next. 9 months shows you realized it wouldn't work at about the expected time.
I'm older than you and I've never been in a relationship.
Not a red flag.
Having a relationship for the sake of having a relationship is not a virtue. If it's not right....it's not right and there;s no need to force the issue.
Not at all g mack. It's good you have experience.
If she's been in a few serious long term relationships I could see how it would be a red flag to her. But to others it wouldn't be.
Only if each relationship featured a child at the end.
Nope, not at all. If you had not been in a relationship more than 2-3 months at that age it would be a red flag. However, you have been in three relationships that lasted a fair amount of time.
Also, it's good that you don't feel the need to just be around someone for the sake of being around someone.
dirty frank wrote:
Nope, not at all. If you had not been in a relationship more than 2-3 months at that age it would be a red flag. However, you have been in three relationships that lasted a fair amount of time.
Also, it's good that you don't feel the need to just be around someone for the sake of being around someone.
All true and good advice. However, one has to ask what OP's relationship with his parentified person, AKA "the mother" was like.
We need some times to complete the discussion. How many miles per week? You know, the usual important information.
A lot of good/nice guys have been in your same situation. The girls who passed on these men earlier in life are starting to see the attraction in them since they have their shit together in life. The girls will start flocking towards you (a lot of women are trash, watch out) if they realize this.
These women are just sizing you up. They do this if you give off a shy or loser vibe. Three each lasting nine months is a good amount. What was her history? Take whatever she says and times it by two.
Is this something people should even talk about? To me, as long as there wasn't marriage, it's nobody's business how many relationships a person has been in. Because if you talk about that then you may as well talk about how many people you've slept with. Maybe if a woman asks me this question I should say that I was interested, but the girls that I was interested in just wanted to sleep around.
I'm 24 and have never been in a relationship. Is that a red flag?
I'm 32 and have never dated. You're doing just fine.
The women act like it\'s strange because they\'re surprised you\'ve had enough options to date around. They assume, by the fact that you\'re unattractive like me, that you\'re the type of guy who get roped in to being a beta male provider. Not that being a provider necessarily makes you a beta male, but women have a 6th sense for sensing men who they\'d be able to use for money, nagging, etcetera.
jamin wrote:
The women act like it's strange because they're surprised you've had enough options to date around. They assume, by the fact that you're unattractive like me, that you're the type of guy who get roped in to being a beta male provider. Not that being a provider necessarily makes you a beta male, but women have a 6th sense for sensing men who they'd be able to use for money, nagging, etcetera.
Lol Jamin, well said. keep us updated on your dating success.
when I come to Seattle (if) I give you a call and wing you for a night.
G Mack wrote:
I started dating a girl not too long ago, and past relationships came up in conversation. I told her I'd dated a lot but only been in three significant relationships, each of which lasted about 9 months (I'm the one who ended the relationship in each of the three cases). She acted like this was very strange, and it got me thinking about it and how I'm perceived to other people.
I don't find that odd. Personally, I had never dated anyone for more than 7 months until I met my fiance at 28.
Are you sure the girl you're dating wasn't concerned that it was you who ended all three 9 month relationships rather than being concerned you've never been in a long-term relationship?
Do we think this is G Mack of Flotrack.ORG?
Or you could tell her that you're trying nine month relationships and in a couple of years you will decide which one you want to keep, if any.