27 yrs old, dating and living at home

If she freaks out about you living with your parents then she is no good. If you want a gf and she freaks out, dump her. If you want some booty, keep the up the lie.

When you're 27, it's not called "home" anymore. It's called "my parents' house."

On the other hand, you could tell the girls that your parents moved in with you, and say it's because someone had to take care of them, or they were having financial troubles, etc.

You can't expect someone to take you seriously in a relationship if you're still living under your parent's roof at the age of 27. Unless there are extenuating circumstances, I strongly encourage you to begin to create your own life. How can someone expect to see any potential future with you if you can't care for yourself?

And believe me, it's not a "win-win" in your situation. Your parents don't want you there. They love you and want to help you out, but after raising kids, parents want to be free of the burden.

On the other hand... wrote:

You can't expect someone to take you seriously in a relationship if you're still living under your parent's roof at the age of 27. Unless there are extenuating circumstances, I strongly encourage you to begin to create your own life. How can someone expect to see any potential future with you if you can't care for yourself?

And believe me, it's not a "win-win" in your situation. Your parents don't want you there. They love you and want to help you out, but after raising kids, parents want to be free of the burden.

First, I know MANY adults are doing the same thing but because of attitudes like yours we have are made to feel like a decision that makes great sense reflects poorly on us.

This is a win/win. I'm saving a great deal of money, just about got all my student loans aid off, and have more free time. My parents are just the opposite. They don't want to be "free of the burden" but just the opposite. They keep wanting me to do stuff with them. I have to enforce limits on them so I have my own life.

The draw back is the dating thing

ages 25 -35 its about 19%

http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/news/health/wellness/story/2011-11-22/Extended-families-are-making-a-comeback/51354706/1

Its not your fault that you are a spineless sycophant. Your parents have raised you that way. I do agree that you are not alone. Its rampant in your generation. You have all been coddled so much and are sucking on your mama's teat well into your adult life.

Of course dating is difficult now. Women want to marry men not children. Although I'm sure you'll find a number of adult girls who have been pampered just like you.

In my day, this would have been very rare. We would have stood on our own two feet.

19% of "adults" still live at home you say?? We are doomed.

I was fortunate enough to get into a medical school close to my parents' house. I am 25 and live at home. It would be idiotic to take out additional student loans due to pride of living with my parents. Living with your parents when you're starting your career is really beneficial because you can invest more time in your work because you lack the stresses of living on your own and can save money or pay off student loans.

I suggest avoiding the issue on the first date and instead identify chemistry and similar interests with your date. Without sounding egotistical hint at what you see yourself doing in 2-5 years time during the date. Women love men who have a long-term plan and are looking to advance themselves in the world.

If you get a second or third date it's necessary to deliver the news in a gentle fashion. By this time this girl may feel some sort of connection with you and finding you live with your parents shouldn't be a deal breaker at this point. The rule of thumb is if at any time your date point blanks ask you about your living situation you tell them the truth. If it bothers them, then they are shallow and aren't worth your time. Playing into the long-term plan you need to give your date a strong reason why living at home is important to you. Being specific is necessary, e.g., you're saving money to buy some real estate to become a homeowner, you are paying off your student loans because you don't want to burden your future family with debt, you are pursuing higher education to improve your career prospects and have a career you're passionate about, your parents' have a medical condition which requires someone to care for them, etc.

I have been living at home for 2.5 years. In this time I had a girlfriend for a year, casually dated a few girls, and currently been dating another student who lives with her parents. In this time I have found that living at home has been an excellent screen for woman that would eventually become bad girlfriends. Additionally, since I have a little extra money to spare I can spoil my girlfriends a little more than the typical student can!

Good luck!

Living a home while you're in college is not a problem. That makes sense.

I moved out at 18, and like people of my generation, going back home would have represented failure. I guess today it's just "smart finances". Good luck finding a woman who wants to date someone who can't even support himself..

To the older posters hating on OP. You are bad people.

I am sorry my generation has to deal with all the problems created by the baby boomers who have run the country into the ground. The job market sucks and the cost of education is too high.

Someday you'll be thankful that young people like us are willing to sacrifice in our early 20s so that we can be productive citizens who'll be able to contribute to Medicare and Social Security while you continue to bleed us dry.

Continue being negative about our living situation, but we are the one's dating cute, fun women in their 20s.

I am blessed to have amazing parents. My parents love me and love having me around the house. They are supportive because they know I'm going to do great things. OP is looking to do great things and his time will come.

On the other hand... wrote:

You can't expect someone to take you seriously in a relationship if you're still living under your parent's roof at the age of 27. Unless there are extenuating circumstances, I strongly encourage you to begin to create your own life. How can someone expect to see any potential future with you if you can't care for yourself?

And believe me, it's not a "win-win" in your situation. Your parents don't want you there. They love you and want to help you out, but after raising kids, parents want to be free of the burden.

As the parent of a son who lived at home until the age of 24, I agree with this. We love our son and wanted to help him out, However, we definitely were not expecting, nor did we want, an adult child living at home. Our other children had graduated from college and moved out. After spending almost three decades devoting our lives to raising children, having an "empty nest" is fantastic.

OP, what is your career?

Yes...I lived in some real dumps, and always with a roomate (or 2...or 3). We ate plenty of ramen. But we were out on our own, and that was exciting. I wouldn't have had it any other way.

I can't imagine leaching off my parents into my late 20s like this. But this is a different generation. We didn't expect to graduate college and be handed a $60k year job. We wanted to buy a house maybe when we turned 30, not when we were graduating college. And we were ok with efficiency apartments with no frills or a cheap starter home. We didn't need a luxury apartment or a 3000sq foot "first home" with granite counter tops and stainless appliances.

Medical Student Answer wrote:

Continue being negative about our living situation, but we are the one's dating cute, fun women in their 20s.

Myself and many of my cohorts have had no difficulties dating cute, fun women in their 20s while not living with our parents, so don't high-five yourself too hard.

I'm always amazed people would want to live with their parents (college students aside). I love my family and love visiting the house but being around my parents for more than 2 days straight can be a f'n nightmare. I'll gladly pay rent somewhere and visit at my leisure than put myself through that kind of frustration to save a few bucks.

I am a medical student. I am not in the job market. Medical school is one of the most time demanding things imaginable. If you think a medical student and future doctor equals "low motivation" and not financial stretched, then you are living under a rock. I don't have a sense of entitlement - I worked my ass off as a student-athlete and now as a medical student. If you don't think my parents love having a future doctor around the house who can give them medical advice and tell them exciting hospital stories you must be a bore. I don't have casual sex with girls I meet at bars (duh I live with my parents). I date classy women who mostly view me as marriage material. My parents don't treat me as dead weight because I am not. They are proud I have the work-ethic and determination to become a physician. My parents have a happy marriage and have been together for 40 years.

Parents who cast their children aside at age 18 with no career ambitions or direction are lazy parents. I totally understand the rationale of getting your kids out of the house but that's because it's the easy route. The fact is my parents are stronger than most parents and don't do what is easy - my success is largely attributed to their love and support of me.

OP, living at your parents is a small time period in your adulthood. Any reasonable person understands that. As long as you have a long-term plan and are optimistic women will be attracted to you and want to date you. Don't listen to the typical LRC Negative Nancy.

Try my line:

My name is George. I'm unemployed and I live with my parents.

OP: Living with your parents is not ideal at your age. However, it's far more ideal than cohabiting with a woman you aren't married to.

Medical Student Answer wrote:

Parents who cast their children aside at age 18 with no career ambitions or direction are lazy parents. I totally understand the rationale of getting your kids out of the house but that's because it's the easy route. The fact is my parents are stronger than most parents and don't do what is easy - my success is largely attributed to their love and support of me..

This is just point-blank wrong, and you probably know it. Parents who raise a child who can leave home and survive on their own at 18, financially and otherwise, have raised a solid, self-sufficient, and well-adjusted child. That speaks to GOOD parenting, not lazy parenting.

Lazy parenting is enabling children to leach off their parents way into their 20s because they haven't taught the child how to survive on their own.

BTW, as I said in an earlier post, I'm ok with students living with parents (as you do). So don't take this as an attack against your situation.

Ole Timer wrote:

Yes...I lived in some real dumps, and always with a roomate (or 2...or 3). We ate plenty of ramen. But we were out on our own, and that was exciting. I wouldn't have had it any other way.

I can't imagine leaching off my parents into my late 20s like this. But this is a different generation. We didn't expect to graduate college and be handed a $60k year job. We wanted to buy a house maybe when we turned 30, not when we were graduating college. And we were ok with efficiency apartments with no frills or a cheap starter home. We didn't need a luxury apartment or a 3000sq foot "first home" with granite counter tops and stainless appliances.

I'll start by saying I don't live at home, nor do I want to.

But the notion that our generation needs to have luxuries to move out is amazing, you have put so many words into so many mouths.

Obviously the med student guy is in med school, so of course he can't provide for himself yet.

And two posts ago the guy saying "I bet you aren't really saving for a house, you go to bars with that money." Again you're just making things up.

Your arguments are totally made up. You made them up.

The real issue here is that there are more people than jobs. The labor force is larger than the need for labor. I had to start my own business to become independent, and I'm glad I did. But I wouldn't have made it to this point if I hadn't lived with my parents for almost a year right out of college.