How to train for the Beer Mile

Warm up [for a beer mile!] a decent amount by jogging about 20 minutes (between 35 and 15 minutes

prior to the start) so your digestive system will be very settled. Then do some strides as you would for any

regular race, then run 2 laps at about 3,000m race pace (finishing about 10 minutes before the start of the

race). You should aim to have a fairly empty stomach, but take a small amount of some salty bread

product, like 5-10 thin stick pretzels, and one small fast food restaurant salt packet immediately after

recovering from the 2 laps at 3,000m race pace (you might have to go number two due to a gastrocolic

reflex after eating something, so give yourself time and make sure you're near a loo) and get in a few

more short strides about 2-4 minutes before start time to keep your stomach settled and to stay warmed

up. Eating something salty and bready will help absorb some of the carbonation of the beers and will

reduce the chance of vomiting during the race.

The alcohol of the 4 beers will not affect you at all during the race (it will hit you between 5 and 20

minutes after, and it will probably be less of an alcohol effect than if you just chugged the beers without

doing any running); rather, it is the carbonation and sudden addition of lots of fluid to your stomach

(coupled with the suppressed ability to ingest the fluid due to running pretty fast) that will cause you to

feel bloated and might induce you to puke. This is why practice (first with water or diluted beer, then with

more highly carbonated fluids) is important - you can know what to expect and can get accustomed to the

feeling of running fairly fast with a full, carbonated feeling in your belly. By lap 3 or 4, you will probably

feel uncomfortably bloated, but if you've practiced, you will know exactly what speed you can tolerate

without getting a stomach cramp or pulling a Kempainen.

Keep your beers cool but not ice cold. Beer that is too warm is not only illegal for official beer mile

purposes; it's also more likely to make you feel sick when you start filling your stomach with it.

Conversely, ice cold beer is obviously nearly impossible to drink quickly. You won't just get a brain

freeze from it; you might actually pass out from slamming liquid that is too cold, since it will close your

esophagus and indirectly hinder your breathing. So make sure your beer is cool but not chilled.

Take a couple of small swigs of cool water (not ice cold, but about the same temperature as your beer)

about 1-2 minutes prior to the start. You don't need to get a buzz from beer before the race; the effect

you're after is simply taking a very small amount of cool, non-carbonated liquid, which will prepare your

mouth and esophagus for the cool beer that you will be drinking. That way, your esophagus won't tighten

up.

When the race gets started, slam the first beer as fast as possible (gee, did I mention you should practice

this in advance so you can get good at it?) and be right on the starting line when you finish the beer.

Throw the can down right as you begin running (not before). Don't cheat on the drinking; some foam left

in the can is probably unavoidable, but a significant amount of liquid isn't.

Run the first 50-100 meters of each lap a little slower than you would during a workout of 400m reps and

belch out as much of the carbonation as you can during this time, allowing your stomach to settle some.

Then cautiously pick it up until about 100m remains in the lap. This gives you some time to deliberately

slow down a little during the last straightaway without a lot of anaerobic distress. The tendency is to run

hard all the way in on every lap, but don't. This is important, since anaerobic distress will cause you to

hyperventilate and prevent you from getting the next beer down quickly. In this event, it's way more about

getting the beers down quickly than it is about running fast laps (until the last lap, when it's full blast for

the final 300m, after you've belched out the carbonation during the first 100m). Gaining a couple of

seconds while running a lap might cost you 10-20 seconds on the subsequent beer.

If you do it right, you should run laps 1-3 at about 2 seconds slower than your all-out mile race pace, with

the last lap fast enough to make the total running time for the 4 laps fairly equal to (or within 5 seconds

of) your all-out mile time.

Give yourself about 5-8 seconds to start catching up on your breathing before you begin drinking each

beer. You might be tempted to try pouring the beer down immediately, but you will probably lose time if

you try this (this is sort of like trying to "bank time" in the first half of a marathon - it doesn't work very

well). It's better to not panic, but to stay cool and start drinking when you're ready and can get the beer

down quicker. Practice is invaluable to help figure out when you really are ready to start drinking.

When drinking prior to laps 2-4, breathe in through your nose while you are pouring some beer in your

mouth and holding it there briefly, then swallow the beer between nose breaths. It sounds easier than it is;

it actually takes some practice to perfect this. Once you get it, you'll know how to do it right. If you screw

this up and inhale any of the beer, you're done for.

Make sure you use the full "drinking zone" (the exchange zone) while drinking your beers and be right on

the start line when you chuck your can and start the next lap. I've seen people forget to use the full

drinking zone and they ended up a few steps behind the line when they finished drinking. I've done it

myself, too, and while you're concentrating on your drinking, it isn't automatic to remember to get right

up to the start line and run the minimum distance. So try to remember if you can.