I am having a hard time. I hate my marriage and I hate my life as a result. I have been married 3 years. We got married BECAUSE we fooled around, were stupid about it, and she was pregnant.
We have almost nothing in common. What she thinks if a good movie, I think is stupid. What she thinks is sexy, I think is awkward. This makes life suck on a day to day basis. What is really shit, though, is that she has some terrible emotional problems. She has anger management issues that can lead any disagreement into a volley of insults and threats to kill herself, to kill me, or to kill our child. These outburst really worry me because I feel like one of these days she is going to come at me, I WILL defend myself, and then I will be the asshole in prison.
BUT, we have a 3 year old and now we have one on the way. I think it is terrible for children to grow up without a strong male presence in their house on a DAILY basis. I do really feel strongly about this.
So originally my goal was to bear it out until our first kid was 18. With another on the way and my life getting worse by the minute, I do not think I can make it another 18.5 years, but I don't know if I can live with myself if I abandon my children. I know I could try for custody, but we have a traditional household where I work, she watches the kids, and I know I pretty much have no shot in a courtroom under the current system.
So when would it be ethical for me to leave this woman? 18 years? Right now? 5 years? 10 years? I seek your collective wisdom letsrun.