I go to restaurants occasionally, and it can be kind of uncomfortable... for example, when I finish eating, I get uncomfortable when the waiter/waitress takes away my food (and I move back to let them do it while not looking in that direction). Also, if I am somewhere and there is a janitor or maid cleaning up the area, I start to get uncomfortable too. I feel like some of it is because I just stand/sit there while these people do the work or wait on me... anyone else ever feel this way?
what phobia is this wrote:
I go to restaurants occasionally, and it can be kind of uncomfortable... for example, when I finish eating, I get uncomfortable when the waiter/waitress takes away my food (and I move back to let them do it while not looking in that direction). Also, if I am somewhere and there is a janitor or maid cleaning up the area, I start to get uncomfortable too. I feel like some of it is because I just stand/sit there while these people do the work or wait on me... anyone else ever feel this way?
Probably not. It goes with going to a restaurant.
They are there of their own free choice (except maybe family owned places). They are trying to make money, pay bills, etc.
I have the same problem when I go to one of my wife's relatives' homes and they have live-in "help".
It is very awkward but as the previous poster said they are making a living.
The name of the phobia is pusskadickaphobia.
what phobia is this wrote:
I go to restaurants occasionally, and it can be kind of uncomfortable... for example, when I finish eating, I get uncomfortable when the waiter/waitress takes away my food (and I move back to let them do it while not looking in that direction). Also, if I am somewhere and there is a janitor or maid cleaning up the area, I start to get uncomfortable too. I feel like some of it is because I just stand/sit there while these people do the work or wait on me... anyone else ever feel this way?
Have you ever engaged on of that class in a conversation?
Sometime breaking caste is as simple as an hello.
I once befriended one from the waitress class, at my urging she became a model and with-in a few years she had a cover of the SISwim issue all to herself. Good things come from little gestures.
afraid to view faces?
Why Oh Why? wrote:
The name of the phobia is pusskadickaphobia.
I would never consider engaging in conversation with a waiter/waitress. They are beneath me.
It's not a phobia, it's guilt. The fact that you're attempting to give it a medical name as a phobia and that you can't look the people in the face makes you even more of a classist. Are you well-off? Inherited a good chunk of money? You have trouble thinking of these working class folk as equal human beings to yourself, whether or not you believe it to be true. Smile at them, say hello, engage them in brief conversation and you'll start to see they're not necessarily unhappy with their lot in life.
I think you are just human. I feel that way when someone offers to carry my bags up to my room at a hotel.
It goes to my belief that those of us doing better are somewhat frauds, in some way.
I have this feeling that someday someone is going to tap me on the shoulder and say "your gig is up, here's your mop"
more bread on three wrote:
I once befriended one from the waitress class, at my urging she became a model and with-in a few years she had a cover of the SISwim issue all to herself. Good things come from little gestures.
Figures, guy takes credit for someone else's success because he said hello to her a couple times and creeped on her.
"You're soooo prettyyyy you should be a model, darling."
"Do you have a boyfriend? I hope not, honey."
"I only want to sit in your section, sugar."
If you have a job, you are doing something for other people just like the server at a restaurant is doing something for you. You shouldn't feel uncomfortable about paying someone for a service any more than you would expect those who pay your salary to feel weird about letting you do your job.
Everybody is telling you that you look down on, "lower class" people. I got the drift that you're just uncomfortable around strangers. Which one is it?
^^^this, and that they are invading your private space or your comfort zone.
breaking caste?
Their class?
WTF are you pinhead Gen-Y mammas boys talking about?
a lot of people have waited tables (including me) who end up doing other things. At one restaurant I worked at, there were 2-3 lawyers, an AA on the Hill (DC), an engineer, and 1-2 others.
My advice to the OP - do the job for a while. Its not bad, you do learn things, especially about other people.
This is way off. The OP just lacks confidence and is not used to being served.
Binaca Obama wrote:
Smile at them, say hello, engage them in brief conversation and you'll start to see they're not necessarily unhappy with their lot in life.
I'm a server and bartender at a very busy restaurant and I would appreciate it if you, the OP, and every one else in the entire world would never speak to me again. I bring you food, you give money. Don't insult me with your feigned compassion.