excuse me for posting this again, but my workouts and runs and time trial indicated that I should've performed right near my 5k PR. But instead, I had to walk and was 3 mins slower. Just hit a huge wall. But part of me wonders if I could have pushed through. I didn't think I went out THAT fast but I did feel pretty terrible during warm ups. I haven't felt good on any of my runs for the past week. I've tried eating more and sleeping more so hoping it works. I've also developed terrible anxiety about the next race. What if it goes terrible too? I finished way at the bottom and way worse than my coach or I expected myself too, and I haven't really been able to bounce back mentally and physically. I'm going to go out slower next time.
I just hate seeing my slow time posted everywhere. That isn't even close to how I should have ran!!! But what if the next race is rained out or I get sick or it's cancelled? What if that's my last race? I'm a mess if u can't tell and can't stop feeling so much shame.