Considering Divorce

What the hell is wrong with you. I went in to take a shower, wrote a steaming post to you about being naked, and then you got all upset. WTF.

What the hell is wrong. I went in to take a shower, wrote a steaming post to you about being naked, and then you got all upset. WTF. Dude.

really, brah? you have ONLY had sex 10 times in the past 2 years with your WIFE!?!

i'm not buying that, brah. troll or you marriage is REALLY messed up.

you need to express yourself sexually. your wife doesn't think you'll eventually cheat on her?

I have reach my tabloid-talk limit for the night. If you are insecure or worried ask me, don't name call before when you don't know anything. I was gone, by the way, for like 10 minutes. Can I go pee by myself without you thinking I'm screwing another guy? Do you realize how crazy you sound?

I saw that someone wanted an update to this thread back in October, but that thread got deleted. Anyways, I'll update everyone.

Ex-wife eventually married her co-worker she got with after me. Rumor was they had something going on in the office while we were separated but I'll never truly know and frankly, don't care. I heard through a friend that still works with her that they had baby together last year. I have had no communication with her and I don't have Facebook anymore so I don't know anything other than that.

In September of 2013, I met someone new. In a weird twist of fate/karma, my ex-wife saw us together at a gift shop holding hands. In November of 2013 I moved 3 hours away to a new city for a new job and my girlfriend moved in with me a year or so later. We got married this past October. We are now expecting our first child which is due this August.

My new life/new wife is much better than what I had in the past. My new wife is respectful, loves life, grounded, well educated, and has her own hobbies and interests (and even runs with me - we've done numerous half marathons and 5Ks together).

Thanks.

Epic Thread.

Glad to see you rebounded quite nicely. Congrats on the baby!

I know about 3 other guys who have a similar story to Normans. Get out if your story resembles this one at all!

Exeter Brah wrote:

I know about 3 other guys who have a similar story to Normans. Get out if your story resembles this one at all!

Yea, but how many have the guts to actually get out? Usually the wife becomes a different person after the baby arrives. The dude in this thread was lucky enough run away before that happened. Not surprised that his ex wife got married and knocked up so quickly. There is always some desperate schmuck waiting for his share of abuse.

Tons of people are in lousy, sexless, passive agresssive marriages but are afraid to leave because the crushing amount of alimony and child support.

If you aren't seeing any improvement, change therapists.

DO NOT GET HER PREGNANT.

Some of this is on her. She's got to think "out of the box" on her career if the "box" she is in isn't working and change isn't happening.

For you: if you introduce a child into the relationship, that bitter, angry person may just end up being bitter and angry AT YOU while raising the child. You are left asking yourself, "I gave you what you wanted and we're right back in the same dynamic. Only now there's a child... WTF?"

What was your parent's home dynamic like? What was her parent's home environment like?

Switch therapists and use contraception religiously. If nothing is changing meaningfully over the next 12 months, end it.

I agree with your advice. There are many psychics also available who can help. Search it online and you will get one.

The OP outlines a scenario that most likely applies to the vast majority of *married* runners on this board. Mutual contempt for each other's appearances, hostility, lack of common interests and goals. Fascinating.

Sorry to ask the obvious if its been covered already, but why did you marry your first wife when you barely knew her, didn't like her (much) and shared no common interests, goals and love for being active?

I see this with guys in my running club all the time, and invariably, 10 years later, they're the ones who have given up running, put on 20 pounds and are pushing a child in a pram with a fat, plain wife beside them. Or, they keep running and are the ones that keep family life and their hobby separate, because they're trying to pretend that twentysomething racewinner is actually interested in them. Its almost like some guys purposely seek out the worst wife/girlfriend they can find. If she's overweight and already has a child, its almost like its bonus points or something.

Didn't you see your first wife for what she was when you first got married?

DO NOT have a child with this woman. At your age, with only 2 years of marriage, divorce is your best option. Long term monogamy does not work for the vast majority of the population (note: I have been married for over 20 years)

http://www.blackdragonsystem.com/uploads/3/9/7/2/3972480/why_long_term_monogamy_doesnt_work.pdf

Norman B. wrote:

My new life/new wife is much better than what I had in the past. My new wife is respectful, loves life, grounded, well educated, and has her own hobbies and interests (and even runs with me - we've done numerous half marathons and 5Ks together).

Thanks.

Excellent ending. Glad it worked out.. first time reading this thread and your posts from 2013 sounded like you were in a pretty nasty place, so happy for you now.

How is the sex life now? Not being a dick here either. Genuinely curious, since at times I wonder wtf is up with my marriage!

wow great to hear OP, glad to hear that things worked out for you

I just got divorced and i'm not good with it, but i don't have a choice at the moment, I'm too busy with building up my business and my partner don't understand that for their future. I recently just resorted to get myself satisfied through paid sex like when I traveled to Dusseldorf I hired a girl that looks like my wife and just had sex with no strings attached. Got it from diana-escort.com. Though I still miss my wife and kids.

Lol, fun read.

Update us, Norman B!

Great read! Hope all is well Norman. Would love an update.