Keep up, man wrote:
Dude, the guy is listed as an assistant Cross Country coach at San Diego State. Just google him, include PhD in the search terms. Not that hard.
How can America's foremost running expert be an ASSISTANT???
Keep up, man wrote:
Dude, the guy is listed as an assistant Cross Country coach at San Diego State. Just google him, include PhD in the search terms. Not that hard.
How can America's foremost running expert be an ASSISTANT???
rule 34.
My favorite site just before running a marathon to get me pumped. I enjoy all those furries.
Stay Tuned For More!! There's more to come!
Stay Tuned! More info coming soon
Does anyone know if more tips will be coming anytime soon???
rcjason wrote:
My Pr's are:
400- 42.6
800- 1:42
1,000- 1:18
1600- 3:43
3200- 8:24
5k- 12:36
10k 27:34
Half- 57:21
Marathon- 2:03
Respectable range
51. Protect Yourself From the Sun
You are going to be out there for a long time, 4 hours or more, meaning you could get severe sunburn. I recommend applying the highest SPF sunblock available, SPF 110. While most scientists agree the benefits don't accrue after SPF 30, WHY RISK IT?!! Apply multiple handfuls to your exposed body areas, and actually just squirt it directly on your face without rubbing it in, and also down your throat. As a matter of fact, you should just buy a sun-repellant suit and avoid all sunlight or other rays. This one should do the trick. You and your pristine skin will FLY through the marathon probably in LESS THAN FIVE HOURS! You can thank me later.
More great running tips are on the way!
666. Weight matters.
If you haven't considered that carrying an extra 12 lbs over 26.2 miles is going to affect your time, guess again. Fortunately a deep colon-cleansing enema can alleviate you of this burden safely and effectively. Plus you can pass the porta-johns with confidence and pride knowing that you were pro-active in achieving your sub-4:30 dream!
more tips to come.
52. Employ Homing Pigeons
Since you are going to be carrying 9 GUs (remember, one before the race, and then every 45 minutes as per instructions on the package), a 4-bottle fuel belt, your cell phone, and probably extra batteries for your cell phone, you are going to need an assistant to bring you supplies in case any of these items run out (or if there is a change in weather that will necessitate a rain coat/umbrella or galoshes). What better than a homing pigeon to call upon to replentish you in your time of need. Homing pigeons can fly for as long as (1,100 miles) and can reach 90 mph, and because of this skill were used to carry messages as far back as Roman times. Yes I simply copied and pasted that sentence out of Wikipedia but I'm "the most widely published person in the fitness and coaching industries" so I probably wrote it in the first place!
More great marathon tips are coming soon!
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-9JvzEAwToPY/TfJZAmtWD_I/AAAAAAAADkY/rv6DP3uKDZI/s400/Homing+Pigeon+043.jpg
69. Operation Bee
Annoyed about getting boxed in during your marathon? Hate Hobby Joggers? Well my friend as an elite like myself you should try my new Operation Bee Method! Try finding a bee hive at your local park! Smash open the bee hive and find the queen bee and spread her pheramones all over you. Soon the bee's will come to you and gather around your body! They will then act as a shield for you and attack anyone you hate!! Don't worry since I'm rich we don't need bees. Who cares if they are endangered! Money calls.
53. Use Compression Gear
The benefits of compression gear cannot be overstated. Have you ever seen those ultra runners with brightly colored compression socks and arm warmers? They can run even FARTHER than a marathon, so they must know what they are doing (plus notice they all carry lots of GUs, and fuel belts and their cell phones too!). Anyway I suggest using as much compression gear as possible so you can CUT THROUGH THE WIND LIKE A KNIFE! As a matter of fact, you should buy several rolls of cellophane and just wrap your entire body. Imagine the advantage you will have over all those other runners with all their skin exposed, while you are wrapped in cellophane which is much more aerodynamic. Just make sure you put your sun-repellant hazmat suit first.
More great tips are coming your way soon!
54. Run as Many Yasso 800s as Possible
Famous runner and writer (not as widely published as me but probably close I guess) Bart Yasso came up with the Yasso 800s as an easy way to train for marathons. It works like this, you run 800 meters, then take a break for the same amount of time. Want to run a 4 hour marathon? Then do a bunch of 800s in four minutes, with four minutes of rest between each. Congratulations, you're a four hour marathoner! Training doesn't get any simpler than this, not on this planet or anywhere else in the solar system. As a matter of fact, that exact sentence was published in this Runner's World article about Yasso 800's!
More great (possibly stolen) training tips coming soon!
http://www.runnersworld.com/race-training/the-real-history-of-the-yasso-800s
Eleven wrote:
rcjason wrote:n+1) Wear the race tee shirt and pin your bib on the back.
All those suckas behind you will know who schooled them.
n+1
+1
n + 1 = 2
rcjason wrote:
666. Weight matters.
If you haven't considered that carrying an extra 12 lbs over 26.2 miles is going to affect your time, guess again. Fortunately a deep colon-cleansing enema can alleviate you of this burden safely and effectively. Plus you can pass the porta-johns with confidence and pride knowing that you were pro-active in achieving your sub-4:30 dream!
more tips to come.
OR...????
rcjason wrote:
10. Pre-Race Dump
Take a dump before the race or you're in for a world of hurt.
Dear rcjackson, I am confused because rule 666 would make it difficult to follow rule 10, which I have been practicing regularly.
55. The Marathonfoto Scam.
By signing up for the race you have unknowingly provided your email to one of the most prolific spammers on the Internets: Marathonfoto. You may have noticed this in the days leading up to the race when they offered you a picture of yourself that hasn't even been taken yet for a mere $29.95. After the race you will receive weekly if not daily "last chance" offers to buy your exorbitantly priced photos at a "special discount." Do yourself a favor and report these emails as spam immediately. Do everyone else a favor and take a massive dump in Marathonfoto's booth at the expo.
69. Remember fellas, if it's just the tip it doesn't count.
Stay tuned for more grate tips like this!
170. Give em the ole 1 and 2
If someone pushes you in the marathon, they are challenging you for dominance. Make sure to shout out "UCLA" and elbow them and make an "S" with your hands showing that you are from Standford and that they just got "Standford Style".
More tips are on their way! Stay Tuned!
LM wrote:
rcjason wrote:My Pr's are:
400- 42.6
800- 1:42
1,000- 1:18
1600- 3:43
3200- 8:24
5k- 12:36
10k 27:34
Half- 57:21
Marathon- 2:03
Respectable range
I like how the 3200 is a slower pace than the 5k. Same with the 10k and half.
the real deal wrote:
LM wrote:Respectable range
I like how the 3200 is a slower pace than the 5k. Same with the 10k and half.
You have to decide which miles you want to take seriously. I just go how I feel because I am very strong and very thin/needle like.
130. Always change your pace. If you just run the same pace then you aren't running right. You have to run up the mountain to get down the mountain. This is what I did for my 3200-5k to 10k- half.
rcjason wrote:
rcjason wrote:Everybody, I DID NOT post this tip #6. Somebody is illegally posting under my username. Be very wary of following this advice....
OMG, I totally did not post this. 5x18 is the only training method to use, period. Why is this guy using my name? How do I fix this?
What is 5x18?
Keep them coming! Too Good!!
