Keira gets told she's "big for a marathoner" and this board spends the whole thread attacking her like it's her fault. It's completely believable that someone would say that to her, but this board can't relate to any of that because it is 75% bearded white males.
Women are always fielding comments about their appearance and it's not just from the men. Other women comment on it too. My girlfriend was asked "what does she eat to get so skinny" not too long ago and she told them "beer, chips and Wendy's chicken nuggets."
Keira gets told she's "big for a marathoner" and this board spends the whole thread attacking her like it's her fault. It's completely believable that someone would say that to her, but this board can't relate to any of that because it is 75% bearded white males.
What does being WHITE have to do with it? Why do you find the need to get racist?
Claims a spectator at the WC told her she's too fat to be a marathoner. Really? IF this happened, he probably said "big", meaning tall. No need to go on about fat shaming and poor body imaging. Doubt it happened and sad to see Keira go the way of "poor me, I'm not getting enough attention." Is it a problem in sport? Yes. Is it a problem with Keira? No. Stay in your lane girl.
Here is what she said in the post that you provided the link for:
..."His reaction was, “you’re big for a marathon runner...” So why did you say that she claims a spectator told her she's "too fat"? Why did you even write that?
So I decided to reach out to a bunch of my adult female athletes and ask them if any of them had felt they had been body shamed, ever had comments made regarding body parts, and if so was it more from male or female. We're talking about women who among them have run in the Olympic Trials on the track, in the Marathon, several NCAA D1, hispanic, black, white, both sides of the political aisle. Wide ranges of heights and weights mid 30s to early 40s. All know I'm going to post this.
The replies kinda surprised me.
All had experience comments from men as well a women. The ladies who were smaller or leaner said the women's comments were the meanest and rudest. Almost all said the men's negative comments were derogatory and/or sexual in nature. Some said men that did make comments about their size said it came across as more along the lines of out of respect and they took it as such.
Here are some of the replies.
"I've gotten most comments from women. Usually in the past it was more of a tone of disgust. Like if I said I was hungry "Well, if you'd eat a sandwhich every now and then" or "what would fill you up, birdseed? Also when it came from clothes "where do you shop, the kids section?" I'm always talking about how I'm cold "Well if you'd put some meat on your bones" "You're too skinny". I'm actually at the ideal weight for my height and weight. I've never gotten any negative feedback from men, I feel like I got more respect from men as an athlete. I only get respect from women if they themselves were athletes"
"Last week a guy was trying to compliment my group ride and I think my riding also..but he did it pretty awkardly and brought up my legs in the process. I get stuff like that a lot, comments on my legs. I used to get the off comments about being the tallest/biggest in the elite/sub elite starts when running. From females, most females I was faster than."
"XXunnamed high school coachXX would talk about my boobs to my face. I'd hear my college coaches would say stuff but not to my face. Mainly it was girls on my cross team that would comment ti my face. *Note..this same girl had a well known photographer loudly comment at a long past USATF XC Championships that she wouldn't make the team because "her f'ing tits are too big"..she made the team)
"the most common comment that is made is about my body is that I'm "big for being a marathon runner" but I'd say I've been told that from both men and women"
"I've had my share of unsolicited body comments from both men and women. When it comes from women the comments seem to be more negative. like I'm too small, need to eat more. Men's comments tend to be more derogatory, like making cat calls or referencing my boobs or butt. All of it is unsolilcited and uncomfortable."
"Well now that I'm at a gym with a strong community of women who lift it's mostly women and mostly supportive. But before that it was mostly men commenting both positive and negative"
"most of the comments come from women about me being "too skinny". It makes a difference who it's coming from, you know my "fit" but when others say it, it comes off different."
"sometimes it's females making comment in comparison to me not having to worry about what I eat because I'm skinny vs them - mostly non runners"
"I get comments about my quads being bigger. Have so since college. Mainly it's been from women and it comes across as mean. Men have made comments but it's normally innapropriate in nature"
Personally I used to make comments about myself being overweight for a runner. "Runner Fat" But I did have some of my female athletes tell me that I needed to understand how that could be interpreted by other athletes. Who know, that said, I don't think anyone should be making unsolicited comments. But I'm not going to tell these women, or anyone for that matter, how to take the comments or how to respond.
I call BS. Is she really this thirsty for attention and affirmation? Does she really have to go into Allie Kieffer’s wheel house? I saw her through the concourse, nobody would tell that old lady she is too fat to be a marathoner to her face. She is tiny.
As I said pages ago, totally made up story for attention. Sara and Molly and even Emma are getting more attention. I feel bad for her, but...it's a totally made up story, didn't happen. I know you read these pages Keira, please don't stoop to that level, not necessary. You are a great runner, let your feats do the talking.
Keira gets told she's "big for a marathoner" and this board spends the whole thread attacking her like it's her fault. It's completely believable that someone would say that to her, but this board can't relate to any of that because it is 75% bearded white males.
Women are always fielding comments about their appearance and it's not just from the men. Other women comment on it too. My girlfriend was asked "what does she eat to get so skinny" not too long ago and she told them "beer, chips and Wendy's chicken nuggets."
Another person who makes everything that he can't explain or figure out about race. Lighten up Francis!
Keira gets told she's "big for a marathoner" and this board spends the whole thread attacking her like it's her fault. It's completely believable that someone would say that to her, but this board can't relate to any of that because it is 75% bearded white males.
What does being WHITE have to do with it? Why do you find the need to get racist?
I'm just listing the demographic, stop being so eager to play the victim.
Keira gets told she's "big for a marathoner" and this board spends the whole thread attacking her like it's her fault. It's completely believable that someone would say that to her, but this board can't relate to any of that because it is 75% bearded white males.
Women are always fielding comments about their appearance and it's not just from the men. Other women comment on it too. My girlfriend was asked "what does she eat to get so skinny" not too long ago and she told them "beer, chips and Wendy's chicken nuggets."
75% bearded white males + 25% non-bearded white males.
Why is this a thread about people not believing her? This should be cause for concern for the brojos. They create this culture and then claim they have no influence over what is said on here. Weigh in and raise up what Keira has outlined. You have sway on here and can affect culture.
When men read something like what Keira put out, the instant reaction shouldn't be "well that's not true." The instant reaction shouldn't be to question how she handled the situation and to ask what she could've done differently. She never should have had that comment thrown at her in the first place. & now that she put it out there, just hear her out instead of writing down the first thing that pops into your head. & stop trying to tie it back to male runners. Just listen to what she is saying and notice how droves of female runners are reacting to her post.
Are you saying that the call I received from Microsoft yesterday informing me that my operating system had been compromised, was real? Cautious people typically do much better in the world than those who believe everything they hear.
75% bearded white males + 25% non-bearded white males.
Why is this a thread about people not believing her? This should be cause for concern for the brojos. They create this culture and then claim they have no influence over what is said on here. Weigh in and raise up what Keira has outlined. You have sway on here and can affect culture.
When men read something like what Keira put out, the instant reaction shouldn't be "well that's not true." The instant reaction shouldn't be to question how she handled the situation and to ask what she could've done differently. She never should have had that comment thrown at her in the first place. & now that she put it out there, just hear her out instead of writing down the first thing that pops into your head. & stop trying to tie it back to male runners. Just listen to what she is saying and notice how droves of female runners are reacting to her post.
It seems to me that the only acceptable response, according to you, is for Letsrun to officially endorse Keira's approach to this situation. Anything short of that would be playing into the sometimes toxic culture of the message boards.
A few things are happening. 1. Women have long been dismissed by men when they have legitimate grievances, and 2. We are currently living in a cultural environment in which claims of victimhood are sometimes exaggerated or fabricated for personal psychological or monetary gain (Jussie Smollett, Amber Heard, and other less famous people). People often use standpoint epistemology to crybully others into submission. (Crybully: a person who claims victimhood but is actually the one bullying others). My guess is that the doubters are motivated by either or both of these two factors.
Yes, it's offensive and frustrating for legitimate gripes to be washed over. However, attempts to regulate culture from above inevitably lead to resentment and backlash. We can't simply mandate how others should feel and speak without creating the very fires we claim to be extinguishing.
To the point about women's bodies. Yes, some men are jerks and run their mouths too much. However, I agree with others who observed that Keira's story sounds like she was intracting with somebody with very poor social skills, maybe even somebody on the autism spectrum. There's a chance that she is using her platform to rant about a person who is simply incapable of understanding social etiquette. Likewise, this idea that the average woman dissolves into a puddle of self-hatred and disordered eating due to a few comments from random strangers is infantalizing. I think Keira legitimately thinks she doing something good by calling out the body commentators, but people are sick of social media moral grandstanding, in part because some of it seems contrived. Notably, Kara Goucher commented in support of the post a day before posting a picture of herself lounging on a boat in a bikini with her two dogs. Kara's post was fine. I have no problem with it, but one can't use their body to make money, whether through sports, marketing one's good looks, or a combination of both (Kara falls into this camp) and expect people to NOT make comment about their bodies. It's just part of the territory. If a woman is offended by comments about her body, she should tell the person or just walk away. Just as we expect men to be less aggressive and vulgar to accommodate women in the public sphere, women have to step up and be more assertive if they want to be taken seriously. Some have referred to this sort upper middle-class/upper-class griping about social etiquette as "fainting couch feminism," and with good reason. If you act like a hothouse flower, people will treat you like one.
Eilish McColgan recently (past 6 months) responded to negative comments about her body on facebook. There was an article about one of her road races, and many of the comments were about how she needed to eat, and others claiming to be looking out for her health. She basically said she was healthy, this is what her body looks like, and mind your own business. Done. It was direct and to the point.
Last but not least: I think some people are offended by these morally-loaded posts by elite female athletes because these women are making claims of victimhood about the very physical characteristics that make them gifted athletes. They're trying to bottom from the top, and that's really obnoxious to people who really are closer to the bottom.
I've been made fun of my whole life for being skinny. Once, a guy said to my wife (not knowing she's my wife) he wanted to run to lose weight, but not look like he's "on heroin like the red head guy over there".
Called every derogatory name for being skinny, called fa#$%t for wearing split shorts, called cracker when running through a predominately black neighborhood and all sorts of wacky things like that.
If that happened today, could I complain and cry for attention too? Or am I wrogn to have laughed at it all?
I've been made fun of my whole life for being skinny. Once, a guy said to my wife (not knowing she's my wife) he wanted to run to lose weight, but not look like he's "on heroin like the red head guy over there".
Called every derogatory name for being skinny, called fa#$%t for wearing split shorts, called cracker when running through a predominately black neighborhood and all sorts of wacky things like that.
If that happened today, could I complain and cry for attention too? Or am I wrogn to have laughed at it all?
If I had a dollar for every time a woman in the office said to me "I wish I could be skinny like you"