XC Coach Comment- Inappropriate?

Don't listen to the trolls!

Just try to keep speaking out for healthy living and healthy activities

Just keep trying to spread the word about good nutrition

Don't overreact. The coach wasn't that crazy to send a text. But it's probably not the best way to encourage runners. Just keep trying to leave by example and try to buy healthy food. Group dynamics and team interactions are complicated. Getting all emotional wound really help.

Not too many parents of real athletes on this site. Try football or basketball or soccer and see if the coaches are as sweet to little suzie and jonny snowflake. Are some of you going to call your kid's boss when they are 22 and get yelled at?

XCMomma wrote:

After my daughter's most recent XC Meet, her coach sent out a mass text to all runners and their parents (he was very upset with our team's performance). His text read, "Times 30 seconds slower, moreso for those less-fit". I was livid.

I ended up replying to his text with, "Less-fit? Insensitive, to say the least".

He responded by sending out an article on how to be better cross-country parents.

Am I overreacting? I would greatly appreciate your thoughts, comments, and how you would have replied to the coach. Thank you, in advance!

That text is harmless. He does not call out anyone specific. It is almost as if he is doing it let everyone know that times were slower across the board. As if to say, it wasn't just you.

I absolutely love his response of sending out that article. I really hope it was sent in the group text.

Yes, you are overreacting. There was no reason to respond to the coach. Did you respond via the group text or just to the coach? I am just curious if the other parent's were able to get confirmation as to how much of a nut job they already thought you were, because they already thought that.

XCMomma wrote:

Wow, I never expected to be bashed and insulted. My daughter trains extremely hard, throughout the summer and the winter. I just expressed to you that instead of leaving the race, with her ankle in such bad shape, she continued on so that she could finish. .

Well then obviously he wasn't talking about your daughter?

Times 30 seconds or more slower than usual? In cross country? A sport where every course is different and on a planet where we have various weather events and temperature and pressure variables?

Coach doesn’t sound the smartest.

XCMomma wrote:

Am I overreacting?

Yes. Parents like this are why I'd never coach high school or younger. And if I ever received a message like that from a college athlete's parent, I would cut their kid.

This just in: a lot of people posting on Lets Run are jerks. This is most certainly not the best site for asking parenting questions about high school runners.

give me a break wrote:

ncrecuvuer wrote:

Understand that most of the replies you're going to get from this site are middle aged males who have never gone through female body transformations and are going to deny any chance there is at undertones regarding the subject.

You shouldn't respond to the coach about eating disorders at all. You should just tell him to do his job better. That's what he's getting paid to do.

Neither of you would know doing a good job from your asses. So please don't tell people how to do their jobs, especially if you don't know what you're talking about.

I never said she should tell him HOW to do his job. I said to tell him to do his job better and his job is to make sure his athletes perform. It seems like she's placing the blame on all the athletes so her telling him that isn't that unreasonable. Which leads me to another point. I don't even know why he included the parents in the group message in the first place. I have NEVER heard of a XC coach doing that. What are the parents going to do, force their kids to run doubles?

Hateraid wrote:

ncrecuvuer wrote:

Understand that most of the replies you're going to get from this site are middle aged males who have never gone through female body transformations and are going to deny any chance there is at undertones regarding the subject.

You shouldn't respond to the coach about eating disorders at all. You should just tell him to do his job better. That's what he's getting paid to do.

"Times 30 seconds slower, moreso for those less-fit" This has something to do with female body transformations? This has something to do with eating disorders? Did he say anything about weight? I think there are a lot of assumptions being made here. Maybe he's a great coach and he's disappointed they didn't better and is referring to their lack of summer running? Could be so many things.

I never said it did. I said males are going to deny any chance that it might be about female body transformations without having any direct knowledge of it. What's wrong with that?

Viking21 wrote:

Do you see any credible evidence of child abuse here? No responsible human being would be so quick to make unwarranted accusations without some semblance of justification. I can understand why that would bother some internet social justice warriors.

There are none so blind, as those who won't see.

XCMomma wrote:

Wow, I never expected to be bashed and insulted.

And, rice krispie treats? The top state contenders, on both the boys and girls team, refused them because they know they're garbage for their bodies, in the recovery stage after a race.

You are obviously not a distance runner.

Seriously, you expected a legitamite discussion on a letsrun thread? You are clearly new here.

Second, I'm friends with the guy who got 3rd at NCAA nationals in 2017 and I know for a fact he ate more pop tarts and white pasta than most obese people, so clearly what you eat isn't a huge impact on running, unless you aren't eating enough.

XCMomma wrote:

Snow plow parent? My lazy a** kid? She works her tail off, 12 months out of the year. I was mostly concerned with the other team members, who already have body image issues, because they compare themselves to the top runners, who look anorexic.

I don't know what a snowplow parent is but I can tell you that I am one of the only parents who does not yell at their child, before or after a race. Never. I've witnessed some terrible things being said to (and yelled at) athletes by their parents. I always tell her to just go out and do her personal best.

I have considered suicide as of late. I suppose I have been more sensitive. Your insults will stay with me. I never expected to be genuinely hurt by the responses of heartless people like you.

Wejo, please get this person's location and either ban them or call the police. The poster, of course, threw in the suicide comment, most likely for affect. Because of that, please contact the poster's local authorities for a welfare check. When you make comments like that you should have to answer to them. The poster claims her daughter was treated in such a way that she, the mom, has considered suicide. Ridiculous, but you have a responsibility when someone posts something like that to follow thru. Thank you.

None so blind wrote:

Viking21 wrote:

Do you see any credible evidence of child abuse here? No responsible human being would be so quick to make unwarranted accusations without some semblance of justification. I can understand why that would bother some internet social justice warriors.

There are none so blind, as those who won't see.

Those who see only what they want and expect to see are truly the handicapped in our midst, although it is simply an affliction of their own indignant manufacture. Is it at all tiresome going through life looking for only the basest motives, and then swooping in like a masked avenger to right the imagined wrongs? Get up five minutes early tomorrow, savor an extra cup of coffee, and spend a day looking for the positive. You might find that you like it.

XCMomma wrote:

After my daughter's most recent XC Meet, her coach sent out a mass text to all runners and their parents (he was very upset with our team's performance). His text read, "Times 30 seconds slower, moreso for those less-fit".

Yes, you are overreacting. He's specifically calling out the people that didn't put in the work over the summer or half-a$$ it at practice. Calm down. He's not fat-shaming anybody.

OP is a moran. leave both your kid and their coach alone. less fit means bad at running not fat. if you knew anything at all about running you would know that. you are being THAT parent. your kid probably doesn't work hard enough, and the way you reacted shows you think your kid is fat. you are going to shame your own child into an eating disorder the way you are acting.

ncrecuvuer wrote:

give me a break wrote:

Neither of you would know doing a good job from your asses. So please don't tell people how to do their jobs, especially if you don't know what you're talking about.

I never said she should tell him HOW to do his job. I said to tell him to do his job better and his job is to make sure his athletes perform. It seems like she's placing the blame on all the athletes so her telling him that isn't that unreasonable. Which leads me to another point. I don't even know why he included the parents in the group message in the first place. I have NEVER heard of a XC coach doing that. What are the parents going to do, force their kids to run doubles?

Maybe some of the kids on the team did not train during the summer which he most likely had no control over. You can't make someone fit in less then one month.

He should have just told some of them that they were slow. Mom wouldn't have liked that any better. But it has to be either genetics (slow) or unfit (training).

There are no good foods, there are no bad foods. There is balance in healthy and happy eating across the board. Hyperfocus on food groups and good/bad foods is precursive disordered thinking.

Yes but not the way you think. It's the coaches job to get the girls "more fit". Your job as a parent, while pointing out the high percentage of eating disorder with girls in xc, you then try and get your daughter to eat the right "fuel"? Lol. Come on. Your daughter is not going to get a scholarship for xc, not going to win a gold medal. So let her enjoy what she's doing, be happy she's staying active, and let her eat what she wants.

If she wants to get serious I'm sure she'd take some of your advice. Until then just be happy she's running, and exercising, and not just sitting in the AC all day.