P.S. Hiding this from your parents sets a bad precedent.
I didn't discuss my relationships with my parents, but in this case he's a loser, so I would.
P.S. Hiding this from your parents sets a bad precedent.
I didn't discuss my relationships with my parents, but in this case he's a loser, so I would.
dunes runner wrote:
college grad wrote:
No. If he stayed out until 6 and is still hammered drunk, he made the right call to skip the 11 am brunch. You don't want him there sweating and smelling like booze.
No respectable person would date someone like this.
not accurate^
annoyed girlfriend wrote:
Yes I'm not planning to contact him. I suspect after he wakes up he'll try to contact me via phone/text, but I need to think about this and have this discussion in person.
I made up an excuse to my parents that he's not feeling well/sick. My brother and his girlfriend will also be there so I'll just be chatting with them. I hate lying to them, but what can you do...
This sounds MATURE and SMART. I haven't finished reading the thread yet -- but if you love this guy and you two are really close -- and it's more likely a case of "poker with the boys," then drunk and poked another woman, then you're taking the right approach. Giving him time to recover his sleep etc., and since he's already offered to make it up to you, he probably feels bad and realizes this is not something he should count on repeating.
Why not tell your parents the truth and be done with it? Enjoy your time with them and deal with him later.
First of all I said a few days not several. If she is angry this will give her time to gather her thoughts and discuss with him when she is less likely to have a heated argument with him. I’m sure he knows she is disappointed. Gives him time to think about it too. Not really the silent treatment. I’m sure if he wants to he can pick up the phone and call.
Been married for a long time. When my husband and I have had a disagreement we give each other space then talk about.
I’m a lot older than you think. :)
Silent treatment is when one person wants to talk and the other does not respond. I’m just saying she should cool down for a day or two then have an adult conversation expressing her feelings.
honestadvice wrote:
1. Get over yourself. At least you are Alive and presumably physically healthy.
Emotional stress is something you can learn to deal with. Be thankful you are alive.
It boggles my mind how so many people prioritize relationships (yes, I know it's not always fun being alone)
when they have so many things to be thankful for. So many people in this world struggle
and have health problems, have never had a relationship, etc. Be thankful and enjoy life.
2. Based on what you've written, it sounds like you value this relationship a lot. So many
women (not all, I can't speak for all women) value relationships and it seems are afraid
or insecure of being confident and single on their own.
3. You can't blame your boyfriend for living his life the way he wants to. If he broke off an engagement
you had with him, he just didn't care enough to do the engagement. The problem is
women are so emotional and tend to value relationships so much, they will look past many things to keep
the relationship going.
Be happy, figure it out, your happiness is not dependent on him or anyone else.
Excellent advice.
If it's me, I'm not pissed that he went out late. I'm pissed that he can't suck it up and make it to lunch. If this was a possibility, say that you aren't sure that you'd be able to go. If a firm response is necessary in advance, make a choice. If the party goes late, you're in for a rough day. Oh well.
The other question that I'd have is this. 7 AM is pretty late to come in, but the OP doesn't seem too concerned about the time. When the two of them go out together are they regularly out this late or close to it? Is that time on the late end of normal, or is a late night usually like 1 in the morning. For everyone saying that "No respectable guy would..." and "no self-respecting girl would date a guy who...", I think those arguments go out the window if these are nights that the two sometimes have together. If dude works a late shift doesn't get off of work until midnight, his time to relax legitimately may not start until 2. If that's the lifestyle, than it is what it is.
OP, read this and report back:
And if he’s late 20’s and hasn’t proposed yet he’s not that into you? You going to date a few more years, be engaged a few and break up. Your shelf life is expiring.
Not A Therapist... wrote:
Seriously, the dude got back from a party at like 6 am and can't make it to lunch with your parents? LUNCH? That's probably scheduled for what..12 or 1?
Your boyfriend sucks. Get some sleep for 3 or 4 hours, wake up, get ready and show up for lunch? You can always go back to bed after lunch.
Yeah sounds like he’s a light weight. If lunch was of any importance, he would have gotten a quick nap then go make GF happy. Then he could have gone back to bed.
OP should kick him in the balls and go out all night with her friends and see how he feels
annoyed girlfriend wrote:
I could give him a call about it... except I feel like him coming to my parents for dinner or lunch tomorrow doesn't give us a chance to talk about how disappointed I am. And it means I will have to appear cheery in front of my parents, while still being upset.
He usually does call for things like this, except he sent the texts in the early hours of the morning when I was still asleep.
I don’t see why you need to ‘appear’ anyway in front of your parents with or without you boyfriend. So if he’s there you’re supposed to act more pissed off than if he’s not.
How long do you have to keep being pissed of at him?
Tell him your disappointed but after that I don’t think you need to keep acting any certain way. I feel like you could be disappointed and still be civil in front of your parents.
Trollometer wrote:
AllPostersRTrolls wrote:
8/10.
You got to page 3, well done.
My Trollometer is registering 7/10, it would have been 6/10 but he managed to get one of the site owners to respond.
Now both owners have posted. Does the meter go to 8?
Yet another thread and post which point out the benefits of not being in a relationship. (Though
I am not excusing his behavior)
wejo wrote:
Trollometer wrote:
My Trollometer is registering 7/10, it would have been 6/10 but he managed to get one of the site owners to respond.
Now both owners have posted. Does the meter go to 8?
Yep, a solid 8 nudging 9, a classis Malmo post would push it to 10.
He just called me. I told him I was disappointed & he said he is done with me for putting this on letsrun. I didn’t raise my voice, it just I really wanted him to go to lunch with my parents to meet my brother’s girlfriend. He’s not returning my calls. Should I text him?
Editor's note: This post is coming from a different IP than all the others from 'annoyed girlfiend.' but both IPS are in CA and only an hour apart so it could be the same person.
annoyed girlfriend wrote:
He just called me. I told him I was disappointed & he said he is done with me for putting this on letsrun. I didn’t raise my voice, it just I really wanted him to go to lunch with my parents to meet my brother’s girlfriend. He’s not returning my calls. Should I text him?
Yes. Then you should show up at his door and beg for his understanding. In fact, just lie down in front of the door because
you're morphing into a perfect doormat.
junk BF wrote:
Be honest and tell your parents your BF prioritizes drinking and partying over his commitments to you. If it's difficult hearing yourself saying that, listen even more intently. Because it's the unfortunate truth.
annoyed girlfriend wrote:
it just I really wanted him to go to lunch with my parents to meet my brother’s girlfriend. He’s not returning my calls. Should I text him?
FMD, he's just texted me and told me he's met her already and has been banging her, this is getting worse by the minute.
[B]HELP{/b]
What to do now?
The "annoyed girlfriend" who posted above is not me.... major trolling going on.
I had lunch with my parents. Still haven't heard back from him but I assume he's still sleeping.
I will post the update when we eventually talk though.
I can tell you about people who went on to marry people who disappointed them early on. The result: Their lives were very difficult.
People who are irresponsible for important matters are usually prone to this kind of behavior. Changing them is not possible. I personally do not continue a relationship with such a person. I have no malice towards these people; they just must go their way without me.