The best and ridiculous complements/remarks you recieved before and after a race

I passed a guy in a marathon at mile 20 once; he was walking and had blood flowing from both nipples, and what looked like puke down the front of his singlet.

He was getting the ubiquitous "looking good" from the assembled masses.

I was helping out at a local high school xc meet this fall and was almost ready to kill this coach from a small school, our class B division. He actually pulled a kid out of the race, reached out grabbed him, and pulled him to the side. I think that is a first in xc history.

PA Runner wrote:

I passed a guy in a marathon at mile 20 once; he was walking and had blood flowing from both nipples, and what looked like puke down the front of his singlet.

He was getting the ubiquitous "looking good" from the assembled masses.

Ha!

I once got a "Looking Good Billy Ray" during a marathon from some college kid." I fired back "Feeling Good Louis!" He and his buddies liked that.

I was in high school, stretching with my three relay teammates waiting for the 4 x 8 finals. A legendary Illinois track coach walked up to us, and in full earshot of his runners, who were awaiting the same race, said: "you guys are my pick to win this race - go out there and get 'em!"

We did indeed "get 'em," but none of us were sure how to react to this interesting motivational tactic. You should have seen the faces of his runners.

That is hilarious!

Semi-Retired wrote:

I was getting beat pretty bad at the '97 PA State XC meet, the only time I ever made it there. Going into the last half mile, most of the spectators had headed for the finish line. So I had no problem hearing my mom tell me that she couldn't find a meet shirt for me, to which she proudly added that she she got me a hat instead. That was a couple of steps back in her understanding of the sport.

I have two.

#1 This one I heard. There was a 5k at Eastern Illinois a couple of years ago. The gun goes off and at the first turn there was a guy yelling off the splits.....on the first time past! "6, 7, 8, 9,...." Do you need you first 50m split?

#2 This happened to me. I was doing some repeats on an indoor track some hard 800s or something. As I am coming up to 1 lap left in one of the repeats a little kid walks out in front of me and I have to come to a complete stop so that I don't run the kid over. I go on to finish the last lap of the repeat. My coach comes up to me after that one and says "Well, you slowed down quite a bit on that one, need to pick it up." You saw em have to stop you jackass!!!

I ran the "Race for the Cure" which for anyone that doesn't know it is a race for Breast Cancer and celebrates survivors. They give money to top three and a year ago I won, at the awards I was waiting with another guy that won money and the announcer was recognizing some of the cancer survivors. The guy next to me (that also won money) leaned over to me and said "Quit recognizing them and recognize the winners so I can leave..."

Goes to show you runners say some pretty stupid things also!

That's funny

Here is another one

I remember doing some 400m repeats during a hot summer day and these kids about 50-60 of them between ages 7-10 were on a field trip to the college. I guess their camp directors were tired from the long tour and stop the kids in the bleaches on our last 400m which was about a 62 the kids were yelling for us like we were olympians.

My hs coach, who was a math teacher and admitted he took the xc coaching job just for the extra income, was capable of only the following advice during races: "Stay in the hunt, boys, stay in the hunt." Didn't matter if you were up front or just struggling to finish.

The same guy was the starter at our home meets, back when xc teams had duals. Once, he took an incredibly long time to fire the gun, and before he did pretty much everybody had false-started. "Boys, you've got 3.1 miles ahead of you; what's your damn hurry?"

A few years ago at a local 5K/10K sponsored by a college group on campus. After the race started, I ran over a couple of blocks to watch the runners come by. This would have been around 0.6-0.8 of a mile into the race. Standing on the corner was a college student volunteer with the required stopwatch around her neck reading splits as she was directed to do. However, she was actually standing at the 6 mile mark for the 10K. She was probably instructed to read the splits as the runners came through, not realizing that the splits wouldn't make any sense to the runners until the second time they came by her.

So here she is reading her splits: "2:57, 2:58, 2:59, 3 minutes, 3:01, etc." as the runners come by. The runners, thinking that they were coming to the mile mark, started clicking their watches, looking at each with confused looks, and generally figuring the course was wrong.

I kindly leaned over to her and told her that the splits she was reading would be meaningless to the runners because the mile mark was further up the road. (This race did not have kilometer marks.) Rather than stop reading the splits, she continued but added a disclaimer... "3:15, 3:16, but this doesn't mean anything, 3:19, 3:20..." Now the runners reactions switch to wondering why she is reading splits if she is not at any particular marker along the race. Sensing it might involve a long explanation to straighten her out, I walked away laughing.

Flagpole Willy wrote:

I've been propositioned by all kinds of women at all stages of my life - including once by a 38-year-old woman who was house sitting for another woman I did work for while in high school - she came downstairs naked and asked me if I liked what I saw; I'll end that story there.

That story is awesome!!! I mean seriously, I have had a few interesting stories in my life, but that is a classic. Clearly, we need to jump start the Flagpole Willy fan club.

Warming up on a snow-packed street for a 5k put on by a local running club. A local opens up the door and asks if there's a race. Tell him there is. As I move on, he yells out "What's the race for?"

Back a few years...For the first time in a while, my HS team was ranked in the top 10 statewide. They go to a big invite, and get absolutely humbled. My high school coach (an intense guy, once a pretty good runner, pushing 40 at the time) is pretty hot, so without saying a word, he jumps in the open race. He runs faster than every guy on the team (including our #1, a 4:19 miler), walks straight over to the team, and just says "Now THAT'S how I want you to THAT". I don't think we had a bad race the rest of the year.

Last year in track, we had this guy on our team named Andres. In the middle of the season, we had practice on his birthday. After we finished our workout, his mommy brought us all birthday cake. It was that chocalate cake with the raspberry filling (his favorite his mom told us). Man, was it hilarious, but delicious!

Fall of my junior year at the XC regional meet, I was greeted by cheers of "cheaters can't win" from the fans of this one team the entire race. This was due to a disputed 1600m that sent me to states and left their kid out. That was the only time I have ever encountered a negative cheer in our sport and I managed to pull off a fairly solid win over the kid I had defeated the previous spring.

The following spring, once again at a regional 1600m race. The pack went out very slow in 2:18. I had been opening my 3200m's faster than that. So I threw in a big surge and ran away from the pack. I still felt very comfortable and after 100m of surging I heard the coach from the team that hated me yell to his runner "Don't worry Nick, he can't hold it. Just keep your pace." He did, and he finished in 4:36. I finished in a leisurely 4:30. I guess that coach just didn't look at the county lists that season, otherwise he probably would've known that I could hold that pace no problem.

morceli1978 wrote:

Flagpole Willy wrote:

I've been propositioned by all kinds of women at all stages of my life - including once by a 38-year-old woman who was house sitting for another woman I did work for while in high school - she came downstairs naked and asked me if I liked what I saw; I'll end that story there.

That story is awesome!!! I mean seriously, I have had a few interesting stories in my life, but that is a classic. Clearly, we need to jump start the Flagpole Willy fan club.

morceli1978,

I'm sure most here have stories that might rival that. I know that in high school and college, even the most unattractive guys I knew seemed at one point or another to hook up with some hottie - just have to be on the lookout for it. Of course, my life changed for the better the moment I met the lovely one-day-to-be Mrs. Flagpole Willy - all the others before her were to help me realize how awesome she was, and about that there is no kidding.

so back in high school i had this teammmate who was openly gay...i dont want to reveal his name so we will just call him first mate urbi. anyway, at the state race there was a pretty handsome guy who was urbi's main comp. urbi was sooo hot on this guy that he kept grabbin the guys ass during the race. anyway, urbi ended up getting second by a solid amount. when the winner came to shake urbi's hand, he popped a huge boner and then went straight to the porta-potty and threw a 10min beat. i guess actions speak louder sometimes...

So this one time me and the boys went to a meet out of state and one guy named Mitch was a little nervous. So on our way to the race he shat his whittie titties, right. He secretly tried to tell his mom that he needed her to clean his panties for him. So she rushed back to the hotel and did as her son requested. Later she came to the meet puled out his undies and said her you go son i washed up nice and clean for yo, right infront of all the guys, SUCKA!

hey, u forgot the best part of the story. the undies werent totally clean so this other guy on the team named andy offered to lick the excess feces from them. well, just like andy, he accidentally swallowed them!!!!. he too a bunch of laxatives but he couldnt get the undies to shit out. so he went back to the hotel and got a coat hanger to try and fish them outof his ass. he punctured the shell of an egg he had stuck up there the night before ( a prerace ritual of his) and raw egg came flowing out his butthole. luckily mizzy's mom was still there to get a picture. Ive got a copy framed on the wall in my room!! classic.