Homer trying to teach Bart about women, and ends up relating them to beers... (several beers later)
"So, I says to the guy, I says, 'Oh yeah, I'll show you, ya baloney.'" (falls out of his chair)
Homer trying to teach Bart about women, and ends up relating them to beers... (several beers later)
"So, I says to the guy, I says, 'Oh yeah, I'll show you, ya baloney.'" (falls out of his chair)
Marge (to Bart): Your father got denied from being a police office because they said he was too fat.
Homer: No the army said I was too fat, the police said I was too dumb
Sausage wrote:
Gun Shop Owner: Well, you'll probably want the accessory kit. Holster...
Homer: Oh, yeah.
Gun Shop Owner: Bandoleer.
Homer: Baby.
Gun Shop Owner: Silencer.
Homer: Mmm-hmm.
Gun Shop Owner: Loudener.
Homer: [Makes a drooling noise]
Gun Shop Owner: Speed-cocker.
Homer: Ooh, I like the sound of that.
Gun Shop Owner: And this is for shooting down police helicopters.
Homer: Oh, I don't need anything like that... yet. Just give me my gun!
Gun Shop Owner: [wrestles gun away from Homer] Sorry pal. The law requires a five day waiting period. We've got to do a background check.
Homer: Five days?! But I'm mad now! I'd kill you if I had my gun!
Gun Shop Owner: [dismissively] Yeah, well, ya don't.
The best part? The name of the store is "Bloodbath & Beyond"