- Coaches should not have a sexual relationship with athletes. Regardless of age, gender, whether both wanted it, who was hot, etc...
- Coaches should not only not have sexual relationships with minors nor should they ever make sexual comments, flirt, etc... Like never!!! They should also never talk at practice and competition about sexual subjects around their athletes, dirty jokes, what actor / actress is hot, going to strip joints, talk about who's mom is hot, which girl on the team has big boobs, etc... I see and hear this ALL the time with even respected coaches. ALL THE TIME. I am sick of it.
To any coach reading this that engages in any of this behavior...Get your sh!t together or go away! Your athletes deserve better. There should not be blurred lines here. I could not care less what someone looks like or who enjoyed it.
No sex between coaches and athletes!
So Joe Kovacs cannot have sex with his wife?
It's pretty obvious what I am talking about but let's get into the weeds a bit for full understanding on situations like that:
- If you have already established a relationship in a non-power balance basis then it is ok if your significant other of legal age asks you to help coach them. So if your significant other asks you for help coaching them it is ok.
- If you have an athlete that you are not already in a relationship when you start coaching them then it is ALWAYS inappropriate to consummate that relationship unless you break off the coaching aspect of the engagement with each other. Again, I don't care about contrary examples of how it might have worked out for someone. I don't even know about the specific example you gave nor am I going to entertain looking that up. If there is a coach / athlete relationship that they kept and then got involved sexually then I would say that the coach was in the wrong for not breaking off the professional relationship first.
I will add to my other posts in saying that it is NEVER the athlete's fault when this happens. That kind of view from society is what keeps many victims from speaking out to begin with.
It's pretty obvious what I am talking about but let's get into the weeds a bit for full understanding on situations like that:
- If you have already established a relationship in a non-power balance basis then it is ok if your significant other of legal age asks you to help coach them. So if your significant other asks you for help coaching them it is ok.
- If you have an athlete that you are not already in a relationship when you start coaching them then it is ALWAYS inappropriate to consummate that relationship unless you break off the coaching aspect of the engagement with each other. Again, I don't care about contrary examples of how it might have worked out for someone. I don't even know about the specific example you gave nor am I going to entertain looking that up. If there is a coach / athlete relationship that they kept and then got involved sexually then I would say that the coach was in the wrong for not breaking off the professional relationship first.
I will add to my other posts in saying that it is NEVER the athlete's fault when this happens. That kind of view from society is what keeps many victims from speaking out to begin with.
your view of a coach's supposed level of power is massively inflated
if i'm coaching Beyonce in her first marathon, you really think i'm the one in a position of a power?
I’ve known a hs teacher, he thought he and this girl had a connection, so messaged her after she graduated, without response back. Is that the correct situation? I see that as about equal. The thing is I’m too good at reading people, other teachers Ive encountered, had much greater concern for. Aka if he’s thinking that, isn’t everyone? I believe there is a biological constant, in that the sinless are relatively clean in their environment, while sinners habitually are much dirtier, that you maybe able to monitor a constant for any ill behavior. That also their maybe an interpretation of mind radio wave behavior, to monitor once again behavior. That another possible biochemical markers for rape and child molestation, such as certain hormone patterns. To be first and foremost, I have much greater concern for non mutual situations, extreme trauma, near homicidal sexual behavior, that I’ve seen appear fairly common in men, that seems much more grave, as far as danger to others go, then these mutual situations. I’ve read their are 6 others recently, some of these are child molesters, I’d rather them all go to jail for lesser charges, then miss one.
I just want to know what is wrong with the women having sex with 15 year olds. Those guys are idiots. It goes against EVERYTHING we typically think or know about women. They want men that are strong, powerful, high status, and a 15 year old is none of those.
I there is something really wrong with a grown woman that is attracted to a teen male.
- Coaches should not have a sexual relationship with athletes. Regardless of age, gender, whether both wanted it, who was hot, etc...
- Coaches should not only not have sexual relationships with minors nor should they ever make sexual comments, flirt, etc... Like never!!! They should also never talk at practice and competition about sexual subjects around their athletes, dirty jokes, what actor / actress is hot, going to strip joints, talk about who's mom is hot, which girl on the team has big boobs, etc... I see and hear this ALL the time with even respected coaches. ALL THE TIME. I am sick of it.
To any coach reading this that engages in any of this behavior...Get your sh!t together or go away! Your athletes deserve better. There should not be blurred lines here. I could not care less what someone looks like or who enjoyed it.
No sex between coaches and athletes!
My wife totally agrees. It was the main reason she asked me to coach her after we'd been married 5 years.
Why is sex traumatizing for a 17yr old today but 17yr olds in generations previous were all out for sex? There is a reason stereotypical movies like American Pie and Porky’s exist. A 17yr old guy that’s not interested in sex is unhealthy.
She does not deserve jail but should not be able to teach again, nor should she have to register as a sex offender.
He's 17, not a big deal
First off, the truth is that as the coach she was in a power position which means that even if she was coaching a master level athlete older than her, she would still be banned from coaching.
Secondly, the truth is that the boy was a minor. Not much more needs to be said on this truth.
Your view is not unusual and why we still have major issues with healthy coach / athlete interactions. I believe this to be a truth as well but a little blurry maybe to uneducated folks.
Power position: not much, assistant coach-throwers or assistant to the assistant-javelin won't have much control over his meet schedule. No casting couch here.
Minor boy: not statutory rape as he was over consent age.
Will be interesting to see how it plays out. She's charged with:
- institutional sexual assault; usually guard prisoner etc., but also coach/student
- sexual assault by sports official; coach/student
Charges are both felonies, so serious career implications.
She could plead to a lessor misdemeanor and save a lot of hassle, or perhaps be found not guilty at trial.
The key missing info is:
1-who was the whistleblower? The victim, or a third party.
2-will the victim testify?
3-are the parents/victim looking for a payday w/ civil suit v school district, or do they find it as humorous as LRC posters?
Parental consent is required for 17 YOs. Why do you think that is?
Age of consent in PA is 16. Neighbors heard screams "I consent, I consent" moments after young man arrived at the coaches home winded on his mountain bike at 2:13am.
As a young sub teacher and later as a coach I had lots of opportunities to get with young female students. Some would actually say "He is cute, I want to hang out with him," and similar stuff. One female student even came into the boys locker-room (before it was fashionable like it is now) just to show me how sexy she could be! Those things are also wrong. Thankfully I resisted.
Age of consent in PA is 16. Neighbors heard screams "I consent, I consent" moments after young man arrived at the coaches home winded on his mountain bike at 2:13am.
As a young sub teacher and later as a coach I had lots of opportunities to get with young female students. Some would actually say "He is cute, I want to hang out with him," and similar stuff. One female student even came into the boys locker-room (before it was fashionable like it is now) just to show me how sexy she could be! Those things are also wrong. Thankfully I resisted.
I think most young male teachers have some situation where a female student made it pretty obvious she was willing to bang, or at the most innocent you can tell when they have a "crush".
I see at least one story per year of some guy, usually a coach in his 20's that is arrested for having sex with a 17 year old girl. I'm sure prior to that the guy was upstanding in every way, probably lived a very normal life, but one night he gave in and sent that text- made that call. Then his life is over.
Even if you can somehow avoid jail, just the embarrassment of getting arrested, and getting fired for banging some young girl would be humiliating.
"Lol if the genders were reversed you all would be calling for maximum prison time. The double standard is hilarious."
This is the absolutely the TRUTH!!!!! This was going on in my high school years ago with the lunch lady and my best friend. She was in her mid 20's and he was giving her the business all night long, 5 nights a week in the apartment above his house where she rented from his family. His Dad did her too!