Prichard should send this video to Nature.
Prichard should send this video to Nature.
Avocado's Number wrote:
The guy behind this video, Bob Prichard, is really something:
http://somaxsports.com/blog/page/2/"Our runners usually cut a minute per mile or more off their running pace after we increase their stride angle."
He's also figured out why Tiger Woods and Phil Mickelson suck at golf, and what he can do to help them:
http://somaxsports.com/blog/tag/golf/
Regarding the horse stride length, I wonder whether Prichard realizes that Secretariat also had the largest heart in race history. Larger aerobic capacity enables longer stride length during non-sprint races, perhaps?
i have to admit those burning brakes were pretty cool
What a wag! I think he must have felt like Holly did here:
he pulled out of edinburgh's cross country race due to injury.
TWH wrote:
What a wag! I think he must have felt like Holly did here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NEu0o62ycmg
So they just made the Somax video as a "red-hot jape" itself? Since they're using it to shill their service, that seems hard to believe. Either way, they're a bunch of smegheads!
malmo wrote:
I missed the burning brakes. The runner limping in pain had me in stitches.
Using that epic footage of John Stephen Akhwari in '68 to "demonstrate" one of his "points" about impact bugged me.
Nice post, though, had me rolling!
"The Somax Professional Training Program consists of 480 hours of instruction in Somax training methods over a period of four months. The applicant who successfully completes our training program will be issued a 20-year license to use our proprietary methods of analysis and improvement. Unlike a franchise, there are no geographic or fee restrictions. The only restrictions are 1. that anyone to whom our methods are disclosed must sign a confidentiality agreement and 2. that our methods will not be taught to others for any reason without prior written permission of Somax. Applicants who wish to use our trade and service marks can do so for a yearly quality review fee."
Curriculum
The curriculum includes instruction in our proprietary analysis of the major participant sports (running, swimming, golf, tennis, baseball, basketball, football, soccer, and martial arts) and daily activities (walking, standing and breathing), Microfiber Reduction, Tension Reduction, Stress Reduction, biomechanics and connective tissue anatomy. Also included is a full dissection for connective tissue.
Examples of our sports analysis can be found under Analyses of Top Athletes. Examples of the results of our program can be found under Clients and Testimonials. Our elite athletes have won 44 Gold Medals and set 11 World Records. Our professional golfers have won open championships, improved their ranking in putting average from #113 to #1, set PGA scoring records, and increased their longest drive from 295 to 400. Our runners usually cut a minute per mile off their running pace, and tennis players add 20+ mph to their serve.
Please browse our web site using the left frame to see the wide range of services we offer.
Fees we charge athletes for our services can be found under Fees/Individual Programs and Aadvanced Swim Camps. The fee for our Professional Training Program can be found at the end of this page.
The Professional Training Program is scheduled on demand throughout the year. We require a minimum of ten applicants to conduct a training program.
Applicants
Applicants are expected to have a basic knowledge of human anatomy, including the insertion, origin and action of the major muscles.
Applicants should be able to show a history of interest in sports or health, an interest in working with their hands, good analytical skills, and enjoy working with people.
Pre-requisites
Pre-requisites for the Professional Training Program are completion of a minimum individual program of Microfiber Reduction and referral of five clients to Somax. An information package and demonstration videotape are available for $20 by calling Somax at 1-800-227-6629.
Fee
Fee for the Professional Training Program is $240,000 per license. The fee is due at the time the training program is scheduled and is non-refundable. While travel and lodging are not included, Somax will help applicants find local accommodations.
Clients and Testimonials
Coral Blanco--age group swimmer
Christopher Cross--golfer/pain
Jim Deveney--golfer/posture
Dan Henrichs--golfer
David Huertas--golfer
David Levinson--masters swimmer
Miriam Nagl--professional golfer
Burt Newmark--tennis player
Nathan Osborne--runner
Preki--professional soccer player
Tony Rigas--golfer
Richard Troxel--golfer
David Verduzco--pitcher
A runner paid the licensing fee, no! He got robbed! I almost feel sorry for the dude.
[quote]somaxsportsscam wrote:
Fee for the Professional Training Program is $240,000 per license...
Clients and Testimonials
Nathan Osborne--runner
Meanwhile, in an equally legitimate technological breakthrough ...
Between microfiber reduction sessions, don't forget to exercise your third eye and take your daily getaway to another place and time in the astral plane using the Hyperdimensional Resonator!
If this schematic doesn't convince you of its authenticity, we don't know what will:
http://www.futurehorizons.net/time2.htm
Just strap on those time coils and let them vibrate your pineal gland until you're whisked away to the adventure of your choosing. You can journey to the early Devonian period and watch the first lungfish crawl onto land. Or you can travel into the future and meet the brilliant and totally aboveboard inventor of the Hyperdimensional Resonator himself! After your exciting odyssey - barring some time-travel-related disaster, such as stepping on the first ancestor of the human species - you can be back in your present-day living room in time for your next stimulating microfiber reduction and subsequent happy ending.
Use the Hyperdimensional Resonator for all your time travel needs!
Next week: Remote viewing the Face on Mars in five easy lessons.
Tanya Skagle wrote:
Isn't that the same video with some text added at the end? I want one that plays Yakety Sax as background music while the narrator is delivering his spiel about altering some physical characteristics without affecting any others and without requiring additional energy output.
For variety, maybe they could dub in some kind of "Wokka Wokka Wow Wow" porn groove to the stretching/groping/probing scenes.
The science is irrefutable, though. It's similar to this line of iron-clad logic: All we have to do is get a runner to increase his stride length to 7 feet and bump stride frequency up to 200 steps per minute for the marathon distance, and we'll have ourselves a sub-1:27 marathoner. Quite simple really!
Yes it is, without the toe-lift counter text, the interest in the video wanes during the Yakety Sax portion. If I had video of Ritzenhein running in a marathon pack, I could have illustrated Rtizenheins sub- 2 hour marathon in highspeed/frontwards/backwards/etc a la 'Benny Hill'.
But I thought the imagery of showing a delirious D.R. being carried by two lackeys, after supposedly doing 26,200 toe-lifts was humorous enough.
Yakety Nut
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zy_6IDRGN6gYakety Soccer Mom
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZQSCsZIumAAfter coming home from a long day at work, there is nothing like yakety sax and sub 2:00:00 talk to laugh the blues away. Funniest thing I've seen in days!
Perhaps before the first London Olympics, where the distance was lengthened from 25 miles so royalty could watch the finish without rubbing elbows with commoners.
malmo wrote:
It's settled. The debate is over.
http://www.flotrack.org/video/403377-Dathan-Ritzenhein-NYC-Marathon-2010-Stride-Analysis
I don't think it's going to be that easy for Ritz to break 2 hours, because he was born about 70 or 80 years too early, and he simply won't be able to find the quality races he needs, to run that fast.
Pritchard is one of those guys who raises the eternal issue: Does he really believe this bullshit, or does he know he's full of shit, and which is worse?
I normally don't get involved with stuff like this, but wow... Some of the terminology fascinates me... Isolateral triangle? Yeah, the term makes sense, but it is an obscure way to say Isosclese or equilateral triangle. Shin splints are a direct result of muscle tearing? This video makes it sound like Ritz should be in a wheelchair by now.
This kind of stuff is dangerous, because somebody throws out a bunch of scientific sounding terms and some videos, and it sounds like he knows what he is talking about, and people will buy into what they are selling. I knew a guy who had taken one of these weekend types of neuromuscular courses and then told a major orthopedics researcher that "frozen shoulder" doesn't exist and proceeded to share his "expertise" on the matter...
I'll keep the term "microfiber" reserved for clothing, furniture coverings, and various dusting / floor cleaning tools... not muscle.
Wow...
I'm going to say the one on the flood of Americans who could break 2:00 is the best of the lot. Nice shots of Ryan Hall running up and down the outside of the World Trade Center.
http://www.flotrack.org/video/403373-Sub-2-Hour-Marathon-An-American-Record
Utter nonsense.
smd wrote:
I'm going to say the one on the flood of Americans who could break 2:00 is the best of the lot. Nice shots of Ryan Hall running up and down the outside of the World Trade Center.
http://www.flotrack.org/video/403373-Sub-2-Hour-Marathon-An-American-Record
I love this shit. Close up closeup shot of Ryan "bouncing" 4 inches and a long distance shot of Feyisa Lilisa purported to bounce only 1 inch!
"It's obvious that Ryan hall is in better shape than Lilisa but he's running up and down the World Trade Center with 6.8 million pounds of weight on his back"
I wonder how many toe-lifts Ryan Hall can do? Can he get out of the chair and walk? bbrrrrrrrrrrrr,whup-whup-da-da-da whup-whup-da-da-da whup-whup-da-da-da DAT - yakety yak!
"It's just like .... running up 6.4 World Trade Centers"
"It's just like .... landing with 6.8 million pounds"
"It's just like .... jabbing the brakes on your car at top speed"
"It's just like .... doing 26,200 toe lifts. You won't be able to get out of the chair and walk"
"It's just like .... twisting the steering wheel while you drive down the street"
Bob Prichards nutty videos are ..
"It's just like .... a toilet, as big as the Great Pyramids of Egypt, covered with 6.8 million tons of Zebra poop. You can see that it really stinks."
OK your turn to try your hand at the Prichard goofy analogies:
"It's just like .... ???"
Dr.S wrote:
I normally don't get involved with stuff like this, but wow... Some of the terminology fascinates me... Isolateral triangle? Yeah, the term makes sense, but it is an obscure way to say Isosclese or equilateral triangle. Shin splints are a direct result of muscle tearing? This video makes it sound like Ritz should be in a wheelchair by now.
This kind of stuff is dangerous, because somebody throws out a bunch of scientific sounding terms and some videos, and it sounds like he knows what he is talking about, and people will buy into what they are selling. I knew a guy who had taken one of these weekend types of neuromuscular courses and then told a major orthopedics researcher that "frozen shoulder" doesn't exist and proceeded to share his "expertise" on the matter...
I'll keep the term "microfiber" reserved for clothing, furniture coverings, and various dusting / floor cleaning tools... not muscle.
Wow...
Yup, I agree.