Does anyone else think running may have f*** up their life?

For obsessive/compulsive if it weren't for running it might have been alcohol, drugs, or work that would get in the way. Its not the running - its the personality traits that send it spinning out of control. A lot of great runners are a little off kilter anyway.

muud wrote:

dmal wrote:

I have been a "die-hard" runner since I was 18 years old. I am now 35. Because of my dependence on running I have lost friends, jobs, a wife, physical health, and mental health. Running used to be a friend. Now, I feel depressed and lonely. Anyone else?

You can't be good at something if you don't try hard. Unfortunately running does not put money in the bank except for just a handful of runners, so it is not justifiable to most people. On the other hand, most people are overweight slobs so...

"You can't be good at something if you don't try hard" - that is exactly what he doesn't need to hear. Second of all, it's completely untrue.

Wow someone had wayyyyyyy toooo much time on their hands to make that XC DOS site. Be like me work like a bitch and then sit in a office 10 hours a day doing completey nothing on the office computer makeing money to draw pictures.

moanfreare wrote:

don't run 12-15 miles per day when you're 16 years old...that'll ruin you. Gerry Lindgren is living proof...a hell of a runner in his time, but obviously has issues.

Lindgren is rumored to have run as much as 50 miles/day for weeks at a time, and his usual long run was supposedly 88 miles. That is a lot more than 15/day. The kids in Ethiopia would think nothing of 12-15/day. Think like them.

I have always been a runner and I am now 35. But the last eight years I have wanted to run. But something keeps me in this current spot, my two daughters. I wish I could just go on another adventure, It used to be like getting a new, fresh start in life. I dream of it often. I'm not the kind of person to just stick in one spot. It was almost like a disposable razor, just use it up until it's all messy then split and get a different one. But there is something special about the time I spend with my own kids. That little time I get is worth anything else I might long for.

Don't any of you know that running is really bad for you? Brisk walking is the best exercise you can do. Just ask a compentant doc. Besides, if you walk, you can spend some time with the kids. They can't keep up if your running!!

Running is not the problem, it just happened to be the device which you used to alienate, dissappoint or hurt people. You need some help and a professional to talk to. The fact that have come to this point is a good sign. Just find someone good to talk to, you can get better, it's easier than running PR's at 35.

I've gotten laid because of running. I've also made more friends because of running. So, sorry man, just need to get your social skillz together I guess.

-Soup

on a local running trail. He had just moved here. He said that he used to run & race with Bill Rodgers, Frank Shorter and other faster guys in the 70's (he was the slow one in the group). Marathon PR 2:18:xx. I'm just a slow female runner compared to most on this board, but I do run an awful lot, so talking to him was interesting.

He's completely miserable. He mentioned he was never married, never had kids. I asked why not--he said running took all his time. When he wasn't running he just wanted to sleep or lay around. Now he is 56 or 58 or thereabouts and he really seemed unhappy about the decision to put running before everything else for so many years. He's still talking about winning the age group in local grand prix--but has blood disorder and had cancer before--so not assured to win anything anymore, even locally.

Talking to him made me briefly consider whether I should spend so much time running, especially since I will never have anything to show for it other than pride at running faster PRs. But then I just figured he was way more into running than I am--plus I am already happier with other things in my life--but still something to think about.

Training and running are great--I don't plan to stop. But don't make running 100% of your life unless you are getting paid handsomely for doing so. Finding at least some balance appears to be important.

Running has been nothing but a positive influence in my life but it's people like the original poster that bring me down. Some would quiz me about what might appear to be times of excess in the sport, and certainly there've been times where I pushed the envelope on miles and extra-curricular running activities but I've always recognized them for what they were and fairly quickly struck a workable balance. Stress depresses joy for the sport and I like it too much to allow for a blue mood.

These are two books to read that will change your life:

Purpose Driven Life By Rick Warren (New York Best Seller)

-This will help you think through what your priorities

are in life. (family, friends, hobbies, faith, and more)

Love and Respect By Dr. Emerson Eggerichs (purchase at loveandrespect.org)

-This is based on study done at University of Pennslyvania

examing 2000 couples over 20 years. The 2 factors to

successful relationships were love and respect.

Dr. Eggerichs has Phd in family and child ecology while

having been a pastor. He is a part of Family Life. He

shows the Bible in Esphsians 5:33 supports that study.

Dr. Eggerichs goes around the country teaching how to

live this out in relationships.

I share to help make a difference in lives and give a greater hope! These books changed my life.

yes and no. or, wait: i don't know.

when i started running seriously (age 13), it was great, exciting, gave me confidence. at that point, i wasn't overly serious though; i ran highschool XC and only ran during practice and meets. being able to run 3 miles was something i was proud of. ...until i decided i wanted to work a little harder so i could "get good."

when i started to get good, i got obsessive, developed an eating disorder and went into hysterics when i got injured and couldn't run; that's when eating got out of control.

running has grown into somewhat of an addiction: psychological? physical? i'm not sure which.

senior year of college i was running up to 4 times a day until i got injured (surprise).

i decided i was DONE with running when college ended; i was very out of balance at that point, having thought about suicide when i missed my conference meet b/c of injury, and i saw running as a horribly negative thing.

when i came to grad school (not running at all), a lot of things went wrong, and i wasn't happy with my life at all. it wasn't until i started to run again that my whold mood became more positive, i got control of my bulimic habits and started to "deal" with life. when school was stressing everyone else out, i was able to keep my cool b/c i had running to focus on when i got overwhelmed by school. in a sense, running and good nutrition helped me to take care of myself and keep perspective during finals.

but now, i'm starting to get back into shape, and i'm starting to verge on obsessinon again.

What i have learned:

i've come to realize the importance of days off and not running yourself into the ground b/c too much running can lead to the "addiction."

(in fact, i've read some research on the "running addiction" and there is a biological basis; some scientist compared the neurological activity caused by withdrawal from running to that of withdrawal from cocaine (on a much lesser scale, of course).

in short, running is good, but it needs to be balanced by other things...easier said than done. aside from being a physical "addiction" it can become a problem for those who define themselves solely based upon running (i see this as especially a problem for talented young runners). i was a confused adolescent when i started running, and i had low self-esteem (which is not uncommon for 13 or 14 year old girls).

As for relationships, the best i ever had was (about a year ago) with another "obsessive" runner; we could relate to each other very well b/c we shared the passion for running and shared the experience of being criticized by others for the high priority we placed on getting our runs in.

i have a theory that some runners are socially awkward and uncomfortable in social gatherings, and that is why they are drawn to running. i was painfully shy when i started running.

However, i would not put myself into the "introverted" category at all now that i am 22; i'm quite social, so it becomes challenging to maintain social ties with others when it means missing training.

....for instance, it is Saturday night, and i'm trading the chance to go out for a speedworkout.

Maybe he was trying to get you to feel sorry for him. Beware of the ODB.

yeah ive become less social becuz of running and it really has taken over my life also........i took 3 weeks off after xc to hang out with my friends a lot and it was the best 3 weeks ever....but at the end i was excited to get back into running, but now I kinda feel like I cant balance this out anymore.

Like everyones been saying the key is balance and if you are not happy running then I think you shouldnt be running.

Purpose Drive Life definitely a good book. The first question asked is how do you spend most of your time, energy, and focus. It goes on ask to what other people

would think are your priorities and identity. The book goes through introspective questions that challenge your priorities and perspective on what is important.

Since I know that is a wise recommendation, definitely going to check on the other book.

-We all know the beer does go old and warm,

the woman afterwhile gets old and cold, (leaves sometimes)

the car becomes old and loses that charm,

and you better figure out quickly what to hold.

I agree whole heartly with this post. A lot of runner's can't put in perspective. Lets face it you run to achieve Life Time PRs then move on with your life. That means for most of us that your prime years of racing our over by late 20s. The runners who I think are pathetic are masters runners. I still run to stay in shape ,but why compete. Your never going to run what you could when you were in your prime. All that wasted energy and time when you could be putting into things that mean something like making money and living life. These people can't grow up and live in the past. I think its a joke and pathetic and in a lot of cases whether they admit it or not. Running did ruin their life. The idea is to compete in HS/College and a few years after. Get your times and move on with life. This was a good post who put it up and I ve seen many runners live self destructive lives due to their compulsive behavior. I hope any take note. One thing we should do is get rid of age group running. Joke it helps ruin a lot of people. Get a life runners.

The feeling of being able to outrun most anyone is a feeling I never want to lose. It has saved me on many occasions from getting fined, jail time, beat, etc. I'll always run b/c nobody suspects I'm that fast. They're so out of shape I can just jog a 6:00 min mile and be out.

What you need to realize is what I realized when I first started running. Running is a super power. Don't give up your super power. It's amazing. It can save your life.

Dude, Vet Runner did not say stop running. It said running and keeping it in perspective were the key. I agree masters running for competition is really stupid if your not still running Life Time PRS. Good luck to you.

Life is all about running, I don't really give a shit about much else so I say it's worth it.