i support high mileage wrote:
Runner Girls POV:
Guys w/ speed goggles (who think girls have speed goggles as well) tell me they are all American all the time, or tell me their PR or something.
I ask them how many miles a week they run. If they respond with anything less than 130miles/week...I say: "No, thanks I don't date guys who run less miles than me."
I would tell you you're running far too many junk miles.
Neliah2507 wrote:
Girls POV #2:
I'm an All-American in both XC and T&F and personally, I don't even like to bring up the fact that I AM a runner. For some reason, people feel the need to tell you the biggest BS story about their mile time or how far they ran the day before to try to impress you. Even if I met a guy out who looked like David Beckham AND I had on Beer Goggles, I still wouldn't bring him home once he decided to brag to me about his "3:30 mile time" he ran one day at the track.
True story, I sh*t you not, I decided to bring a guy home once which is not a regular occassion for me but I was excited to finally be drunk enough to allow myself a good time. As I'm in the next room looking for a DVD to watch, he's busy snooping through a small chest on my dresser and pulls out an All-American trophy for the 10k. He then proceeds to ask me what time I ran, and I told him. He then has the nerve to tell me he ran "about 25:00 mins" in a road 10k. I told him "No, no you didn't." He argued yes and asked why I would argue. At this point I was too drunk to care, and proceeded to tell him it was a world record by well over a minute and that he probably couldn't beat Bekele even with a 5k lead in the 10k. To end my rant, I made him leave and ended up ruining my own good time haha...
And this is why I will never tell anyone I'm All-American, esp if it involves getting laid.
that is by far FUNNIER than any speed goggles story I have!
Some nerd wrote:
i support high mileage wrote:Runner Girls POV:
Guys w/ speed goggles (who think girls have speed goggles as well) tell me they are all American all the time, or tell me their PR or something.
I ask them how many miles a week they run. If they respond with anything less than 130miles/week...I say: "No, thanks I don't date guys who run less miles than me."
I would tell you you're running far too many junk miles.
to which i would respond to you: "I do it all in singles p*ssy."
Is your last name Porter?
Once a cocky Division I All-American (almost) asked me to kiss his NCAA ring.
I responded: "Sure! Right after you take my USA World Championship singlet to the cleaners and don't forget to wash both of them".
....That usually got me whatever girl was on his shoulder.
I have, but it only seems to work on chicks at the T. I guess they're just too classy at other bars.
I can't my accent would give me away.
Now that's funny. For a 40-44 year old the 5000 standard on the track is 16:15. A little more respectable.
NYCMaster wrote:
If you're 40 or over, you may not even have to lie. The USATF "All-American Road Running Standard of Excellence" for Masters men is a sub-21:00 5K.
Attain this standard, and for $12 you can even get a certificate from the USATF affirming your All-American status.
I support high mileage/ wrote:
Some nerd wrote:I would tell you you're running far too many junk miles.
to which i would respond to you: "I do it all in singles p*ssy."
I would then respond with "Cool story but that doesn't change the fact you're doing too many junk miles."
Neliah2507 wrote:
True story, I sh*t you not, I decided to bring a guy home once which is not a regular occassion for me but I was excited to finally be drunk enough to allow myself a good time. As I'm in the next room looking for a DVD to watch, he's busy snooping through a small chest on my dresser and pulls out an All-American trophy for the 10k. He then proceeds to ask me what time I ran, and I told him. He then has the nerve to tell me he ran "about 25:00 mins" in a road 10k. I told him "No, no you didn't." He argued yes and asked why I would argue. At this point I was too drunk to care, and proceeded to tell him it was a world record by well over a minute and that he probably couldn't beat Bekele even with a 5k lead in the 10k. To end my rant, I made him leave and ended up ruining my own good time haha...
And this is why I will never tell anyone I'm All-American, esp if it involves getting laid.
This makes me horny for some reason.
elcjfrdylc wrote:
Clammy wrote:Maybe for another sport. My wife doesn't even care that I was an all american.
Ditto, my live-in gf could care less about mine.
Couldn't care less. Jesus
ryan foreman wrote:
Once at a restaurant I went up to a table with some gorgeous women. I started looking around and underneath the table and asked "excuse me, I'm looking for an Olympic gold medal that I left here. I would hate to lose it, its part of a set."
Reminds me of the comedian Jackie Vernon trying to impress girls at the beach (kicking around in the sand): "Excuse me, I seem to have lost my Congressional Medal of Honor. That's alright. I have another one at home."
I ran in NAIA Division 2, which is like NCAA Division 4 Light and didn't even come close to making All American Status. But if I did, you sure as hell would bet I would have tattoo that on my forehead...
to which i would respond to you: "I do it all in singles p*ssy."[/quote]
I would then respond with "Cool story but that doesn't change the fact you're doing too many junk miles."[/quote]
I'd have to just give up and say:
ha ha. "okay coach."
I don't think we could go into a training debate on the first date. [quote]Some nerd wrote:
Regretable wrote:
I ran in NAIA Division 2, which is like NCAA Division 4 Light and didn't even come close to making All American Status. But if I did, you sure as hell would bet I would have tattoo that on my forehead...
Thus proving that NAIA Division 2 is also far intellectually inferior to NCAA institutions.
facebookisawesome wrote:
I have, but it only seems to work on chicks at the T. I guess they're just too classy at other bars.
Yeah those townies will believe any bullshit you tell them.
emyouer wrote:
Ghost of Ashenfelter wrote:2) I once had a girl try to impress me by telling me she was national champ in the 10,000 for Marquette. I asked her if she knew Keith Hanson, and she said she didn't. Then I told her that was odd, because Keith Hanson had been national champ in the 10,000 for Marquette in the same year she had claimed to be. In retrospect, perhaps I should have let her go with it; since I was the only other serious runner at this particular social function, maybe it might have led somewhere.
This actually may be true. Katie Webb was national champ for Marquette in 1986 I believe, back when the women were still in the NAIA. The men's and women's team were completely separate and she was the type that probably wouldn't know the men's team that well. You would at least think she would know another national champion at the same school, but you never know.
That's exactly in keeping with how I might screw up a social situation. I have a litany of stories of that ilk.
On a side note, Warren Moon once asked me if I was going to compete in the Goodwill Games.
Nope, I usually just undress if I want to impress a woman.
If you don't put on your AA medal while butt naked and put your P in some V, then you aren't doing your AA status true justice.
Phil Latio wrote:
If you don't put on your AA medal while butt naked and put your P in some V, then you aren't doing your AA status true justice.
You are obviously not an All-American, it is awarded with a certificate.