If you sincerely don’t want to have kids, then don’t. There are many people who should not (unmarried ones, for example). The vice president isn’t going to come knocking on the door and force you to have sex with your wife (if you have one).
All I’m saying is that for a nation to prosper (and the human race to continue), there needs to be a next generation. I think many of the fearmongering about how life if over once you have them is really overblown.
No kids. I never wanted them. I don’t regret it. I wish more who realized they weren’t meant to have kids wouldn’t.
At the same time, I talk to myself, am highly eccentric and it gets worse with time, realize my life expectancy is probably 10 years less than my friends who now have grandkids ( unimaginable) and on the 31st when I have a doctors appointment where sedation is used, I have to pay 98 bucks to a place called “ Patient Transport “ for the drive to and from the clinic.
If people don't have kids and if we don't import millions of immigrants, we will have less crowds and traffic, more natural resources, lower rates of violent crime and unemployment, lower housing costs, and more motivation to cure diseases and aging so that the elderly can continue working and contributing to society.
That would be a country and future that I'd love to live in and be a part of.
Fine point, as long as you’re not counting on X number of people to pay into social security (and I’m in no way saying that you are: I’m just saying that that is one criterion that makes your point more reasonable.)
My wife is pregnant with our sixth child right now. 2 girls, 3 boys so far. They are an awful lot of work; we're not taking cool vacations very often; piano lessons, private school cost an arm and a leg every month. Being a parent is also the most amazing thing you can do. Yes, I work all day and then come home and help with homework and do dishes and help get kids to bed, but it's all worth it. Kids are great and they make you a better person.
No kids. I never wanted them. I don’t regret it. I wish more who realized they weren’t meant to have kids wouldn’t.
At the same time, I talk to myself, am highly eccentric and it gets worse with time, realize my life expectancy is probably 10 years less than my friends who now have grandkids ( unimaginable) and on the 31st when I have a doctors appointment where sedation is used, I have to pay 98 bucks to a place called “ Patient Transport “ for the drive to and from the clinic.
It’s not that great to be childless.
If you did have kids, there's no guarantee that they would take care of you, and you'd be spending way more than 98 bucks on them. Probably more than 98 thousand bucks as well.
You're now free to be as eccentric as you wish with no one to judge you. And it's highly unlikely that your life expectancy will be 10 years less than your friends who have grandkids. Even if you died today and all your friends reached the pre-pandemic life expectancy of 78 years, that's only an 8 year difference.
My wife is pregnant with our sixth child right now. 2 girls, 3 boys so far. They are an awful lot of work; we're not taking cool vacations very often; piano lessons, private school cost an arm and a leg every month. Being a parent is also the most amazing thing you can do. Yes, I work all day and then come home and help with homework and do dishes and help get kids to bed, but it's all worth it. Kids are great and they make you a better person.
This is great to read. Good for you and your wife.
If you sincerely don’t want to have kids, then don’t. There are many people who should not (unmarried ones, for example). The vice president isn’t going to come knocking on the door and force you to have sex with your wife (if you have one).
All I’m saying is that for a nation to prosper (and the human race to continue), there needs to be a next generation. I think many of the fearmongering about how life if over once you have them is really overblown.
I agree with you for the most part. But I don't think it sets a good example when the VP (or candidate to be VP) starts insulting some among us with phrases like "Childless Cat Ladies".
Realistically you have until age 40 (+/- a little bit) to achieve your running goals in the marathon and half, and maybe a little less for shorter distances. Having kids, means you prob won't reach your potential here, esp if you are a woman, since a man could have kids after 40.
The most stressful years of work - starting a career, your best research, whatever, are likely to occur in your 20s or 30s too. Kids make this more difficult. Having kids means you will go from field leader potential to steady paycheck earner - or you'll be a near absentee parent.
Then there is the statistic that a significant number of marriages end in divorce - which could wreck you financially. Imagine sacrificing your career and athletic potential for a decade only to find your spouse is leaving you, will take the house, half your earnings, and get majority custody of the kids.
Nothing against those who have kids. Its a big responsibility and rewarding in its own way, but with the way our society is set up unless you have a super supportive partner and family network, you're throwing away your chance to be anybody but an npc in somebody else's story.
This is what I have observed from those with kids:
- Runs - they will be done before dawn and at night for several years. Some child having runners I know only spend time running outside on the weekend
-Vacation - these will suck for the better part of 18 years. Instead of going places to have adventure its all where relatives live or family friendly beach towns. Maybe after a decade they can go to national parks
-Travelling to race - you are spending your hotel money going to your kids events not yours lol. Maybe 1x a year you can travel to a marathon (the other one you're doing is hometown marathon)
-Food - you are making foods your kids will eat, not what you want to eat for a decade plus. Same with picking restaurants.
-Movies - I would just take my kids to see Dune or whatever I wanted but a lot of people freak out about family friendly entertainment
-books - if you read at all, it prob takes a month or longer to get through a novel now. You prob read at lunch and while laying in bed
- games - you buy them for the kids. Something like wtcher 3 takes 9 months, playing when you get a chance at night
ETC.
The most successful kid having runners I know run while their kids have practice, from the kids practice facility and get their kids into running.
Realistically you have until age 40 (+/- a little bit) to achieve your running goals in the marathon and half, and maybe a little less for shorter distances. Having kids, means you prob won't reach your potential here, esp if you are a woman, since a man could have kids after 40.
The most stressful years of work - starting a career, your best research, whatever, are likely to occur in your 20s or 30s too. Kids make this more difficult. Having kids means you will go from field leader potential to steady paycheck earner - or you'll be a near absentee parent.
Then there is the statistic that a significant number of marriages end in divorce - which could wreck you financially. Imagine sacrificing your career and athletic potential for a decade only to find your spouse is leaving you, will take the house, half your earnings, and get majority custody of the kids.
Nothing against those who have kids. Its a big responsibility and rewarding in its own way, but with the way our society is set up unless you have a super supportive partner and family network, you're throwing away your chance to be anybody but an npc in somebody else's story.
99.99999% of people will never be remembered by anyone but their children.
If you're 25 and you're not famous yet it's very unlikely it's in the cards for you.
Almost all of society's problems are directly related to this new narcissism where everyone alive thinks their special or would be if some "ism" wasn't keeping them down.
Family is everything for almost everyone.
When you're on your death bed you won't be wishing you got drunk more or stayed late at work more to to get the meaningless promotion.
Realistically you have until age 40 (+/- a little bit) to achieve your running goals in the marathon and half, and maybe a little less for shorter distances. Having kids, means you prob won't reach your potential here, esp if you are a woman, since a man could have kids after 40.
The most stressful years of work - starting a career, your best research, whatever, are likely to occur in your 20s or 30s too. Kids make this more difficult. Having kids means you will go from field leader potential to steady paycheck earner - or you'll be a near absentee parent.
Then there is the statistic that a significant number of marriages end in divorce - which could wreck you financially. Imagine sacrificing your career and athletic potential for a decade only to find your spouse is leaving you, will take the house, half your earnings, and get majority custody of the kids.
Nothing against those who have kids. Its a big responsibility and rewarding in its own way, but with the way our society is set up unless you have a super supportive partner and family network, you're throwing away your chance to be anybody but an npc in somebody else's story.
99.99999% of people will never be remembered by anyone but their children.
If you're 25 and you're not famous yet it's very unlikely it's in the cards for you.
Almost all of society's problems are directly related to this new narcissism where everyone alive thinks their special or would be if some "ism" wasn't keeping them down.
Family is everything for almost everyone.
When you're on your death bed you won't be wishing you got drunk more or stayed late at work more to to get the meaningless promotion.
If family is so important, why not spend more time with them instead of posting so much here?
99.99999% of people will never be remembered by anyone but their children.
If you're 25 and you're not famous yet it's very unlikely it's in the cards for you.
Almost all of society's problems are directly related to this new narcissism where everyone alive thinks their special or would be if some "ism" wasn't keeping them down.
Family is everything for almost everyone.
When you're on your death bed you won't be wishing you got drunk more or stayed late at work more to to get the meaningless promotion.
If family is so important, why not spend more time with them instead of posting so much here?
Smarter people are capable of multitasking. A powerful computer can run multiple programs at once while downloading a bunch of files while streaming a movie on one screen and playing a game on the other.
People like yourself are like the old 100MHz computers. You can only do one thing at a time and you're not even very good at the one thing.
This is what I have observed from those with kids:
- Runs - they will be done before dawn and at night for several years. Some child having runners I know only spend time running outside on the weekend
-Vacation - these will suck for the better part of 18 years. Instead of going places to have adventure its all where relatives live or family friendly beach towns. Maybe after a decade they can go to national parks
-Travelling to race - you are spending your hotel money going to your kids events not yours lol. Maybe 1x a year you can travel to a marathon (the other one you're doing is hometown marathon)
-Food - you are making foods your kids will eat, not what you want to eat for a decade plus. Same with picking restaurants.
-Movies - I would just take my kids to see Dune or whatever I wanted but a lot of people freak out about family friendly entertainment
-books - if you read at all, it prob takes a month or longer to get through a novel now. You prob read at lunch and while laying in bed
- games - you buy them for the kids. Something like wtcher 3 takes 9 months, playing when you get a chance at night
ETC.
The most successful kid having runners I know run while their kids have practice, from the kids practice facility and get their kids into running.
Agree that when you have kids, your running might take a hit (unless you’re a pro and it’s your job). For me it’s just getting a run in most days no matter how short or slow (I don’t care, I have no interest in competing anymore at this moment). But for that and everything else, it’s a matter of getting creative. Here’s how I would approach it:
-Runs: Jogging stroller, run laps while your kid is playing at the park or at soccer practice. Either that early morning or evening (wouldn’t that be the case if you had a regular job anyway)?
-Food: There are plenty of recipes that are kid-friendly and appealing to adults too. And healthy. Just takes some research.
-Movies: family movie night and let the kids pick. Alternate that with letting kids watch their own movie in one room, and a grownup movie in another room.
-Books: Mandated quiet time during the day or evening. Homework, reading, etc. I also read a lot while my baby was sleeping on me.
-Games: see above.
Also easy to include them in chores. Babies love watching laundry get folded, kids love having a little “task” while Dad does yardwork. As long as it’s not framed as a “chore,” they usually see it as fun.
It’s all about just intentionally setting aside the time to do it. Obviously there will be prioritization and sacrifices, but the myth that all you’ll ever be doing from here on out is diapers and packing lunches is overblown.
Also, it’s essential that you and your spouse are always on the same team. There are plenty of marriages that are sadly not like that, so maybe that’s the issue.
Realistically you have until age 40 (+/- a little bit) to achieve your running goals in the marathon and half, and maybe a little less for shorter distances. Having kids, means you prob won't reach your potential here, esp if you are a woman, since a man could have kids after 40.
The most stressful years of work - starting a career, your best research, whatever, are likely to occur in your 20s or 30s too. Kids make this more difficult. Having kids means you will go from field leader potential to steady paycheck earner - or you'll be a near absentee parent.
Then there is the statistic that a significant number of marriages end in divorce - which could wreck you financially. Imagine sacrificing your career and athletic potential for a decade only to find your spouse is leaving you, will take the house, half your earnings, and get majority custody of the kids.
Nothing against those who have kids. Its a big responsibility and rewarding in its own way, but with the way our society is set up unless you have a super supportive partner and family network, you're throwing away your chance to be anybody but an npc in somebody else's story.
99.99999% of people will never be remembered by anyone but their children.
If you're 25 and you're not famous yet it's very unlikely it's in the cards for you.
Almost all of society's problems are directly related to this new narcissism where everyone alive thinks their special or would be if some "ism" wasn't keeping them down.
Family is everything for almost everyone.
When you're on your death bed you won't be wishing you got drunk more or stayed late at work more to to get the meaningless promotion.
Given a choice between an incredibly tiny amount of fame (being remembered by your children and nobody else) and reaching your potential, I'd pick reaching my potential. And this is coming from someone who will never run a sub 15 5K, make over 400K a year, or become world-class in any sport or activity.
If family is so important, why not spend more time with them instead of posting so much here?
Smarter people are capable of multitasking. A powerful computer can run multiple programs at once while downloading a bunch of files while streaming a movie on one screen and playing a game on the other.
People like yourself are like the old 100MHz computers. You can only do one thing at a time and you're not even very good at the one thing.