me and one of my teammates were finishing up a 10 miler when these guys were walking through their grass to their house and we pass by them and about 2 secs after we pass them and one starts yelling \"why dont you put some longer shorts on...thats like indecent exposure or something?\" and my teammate yells back \"this is your mom\'s underwear bitch!\", they weren\'t very happy about this comment.
In my 25-30years of running I have had a fair few insults,so here are things I have done to insults.
Group or gang of youths --- just ignore and wave in opposite direction at some imaginery person,whilst making a phone symbal with your hand. Usual response they look for ages after you have passed to see if anyone is looking.
Group gang of ugly females----As above
Group gang of hot females---- immediatly get down and do 20 push ups then carry on, may lead to a date at a later time(on more than one occasion has happened to me)
Driver honking horn---- Either wave with both hands,or if car is going slow or stops up ahead, always have a slip of paper in short pocket with your autograph on just hand it to them and say thanks for honking, please dont put this on ebay though.
Driver cutting you up---- either dive to floor as though contact has been made quite often drivers slow down or reverse say are you ok then just get up carry on no eye contact or words. Makes them feel stupid.
Or just wave both hands plus a thumb in air. Again just makes them look small.
Dog owner with loose dog--- If a big dog who looks like might bite just walk ignore owner not worth risking a bite but ignoring owner always riles them without you looking bad guy.
If dog is clearly not a threat encourage dog to follow you and head for nearest main road the owner soon gets message to keep do on leash. a friend of mine always goes running with dog treats in shorts and gives to dog to lure away from owner. On one got a dog across a road, owner panicing hysterically. That owner always now has dog on leash.
People blocking you path ----- Usually old folk do this just run round its extra mileage! and say thanks alot have a nice day in a friendly voice.
Idiots really looking for a punch up ---- cross road to avoid. Or if you know you can outrun them and know the neighbourhood just say come on then with a hand beckoning motion if they chase it pumps you up to go faster fo last few miles and if you are lucky they have heart attack.
Best not to try unless you KNOW you can outrun them.
The main point is runners are more intelligent than your average asshole so use that intelligence, don't stoop to their level.Going for the violent approach just gives you bad Karma.
What you should focus is to make them feel insignificant as though what they have done has not bothered you in the slightest. If you give a negative reaction that is what they are looking for.
You have to be the master not the puppet.
Got to agree with post. What you have to remember is there are 2 types of people that insult you whilst running.
Either type 1 who is dong it to show off to someone else.
or Type 2 who is trying to make his herself feel better by insulting you.
type 2 is easy as really they are jealous of what you do but rather than call themselves they call you. So deep down you have won already as they would love to be running but can't be bothered.
They will probably not live past 60 at most. Have bad health cant play with their kids on the park cant get it up the wife etc etc. So you should pity them and not wate your running energy on them. He who laughs last etc.
type 1 is the same as type 2 but perhaps even wose need to put others down in front of his peirs just to fell more of a man. probably a small penis low self esteem and butt ugly.
So again not worth wasting energy. As a runner you are a god the insulter is a insect. when you hit an insect whilst running you wipe your brow where it hits and do the next stride no big deal no issue. This is how to treat type 1s and 2s.
And when you are retired and 70years old still getting erections and can still run a mean quarter mile you will have a slight grin on your face when you pass the church on the way to a date with someone 30 years younger and see all the grave stones of the types 1s and 2s on the way .....
I was out for an 11 mile stroll the other day and came up on two guys walking together. As soon as I passed them, one rushed up and started running next to me, trying to make fun of my form while his buddy laughed. I then said, "Nice! I've been looking for a training partner. 7 more miles to go." As he started to slow down, I slowed down with him and and kept mocking him for not being able to keep a pace until he was too tired to keep going. Then I picked it up again and continued with my run.
The other day I got bumped by a truck. Just an old redneck who had no idea that he's supposed to yield to runners. To make it worse, it was on a coned-off section of road because there was a race going on. He didn't hurt me and barely touched me. Best advice I could give to anyone reading this: Get a plate #!! I did, went to the cops a few days later. I was polite and visited the police face to face and explained what had happened. The Cop was in disbelief. He looked the guy up and went to his house to "Find out what his damn problem is." It got me fired up. I think the difference is that cops are more receptive if they see you face to face, instead of some ticked off voice over the phone.
My favorite was when I was jogging to work (at a local restaraunt) at like 11pm in a college town, this black guy was running at about a 6 min pace, and this rich looking sorority girl yells, \"why are you running? dont you have a life?\"
he turns around and yells
\"suck my dick, bitch\"
I laughed for days, and still do when I think about it.
when i get harrassed by cars in australia, i just stick my pinky finger up and wiggle it. its from an advertisement, everyone has seen the add and know its ment to say the driver has a small dick. cuts the jerks real deep because they know its true.
Near the end of a training run my soph year of college we were in a group of about 15 guys and passed a small neighborhood basketball court where a couple of elemantary school students were shooting hoops. Needless to say, they yelled something about how short our shorts were, which didnt strike a nerve, but as we got further away they started yelling "keep running fags, f*ckin pussies!"
The whole group turns around and starts chasing after them, and the kids bolt for their house. One of my teammates sprints ahead yelling "get back here you little sh*ts!!"
the kids get to the safety of their home and we run back to campus and finish our run. We are all laughing about it. The next day, our coach addresses the issue because I guess the mom of one of the kids called the university.
Coach says "now I know that chasing those kids was a good way to get in a stride, but you need to conduct yourself in a manner fitting for the university."
I stick to the usual "Suck my Dick!"
then they might come back with "fag" or "What are you gay"
then i'll normally reply with "No but you look enough like a little bitch to do it!"
I've actualy broken a mirror of of a truck while i ran by and he was stopped at a traffic light, they threw an empty beer bottle at me while i was running and didnt realize there was a red light...they chased me for a good 30 mins until i hid behind a dumpster at publix...
There is a group of skateboard kids I see on a route I run, I can sometimes see the wheels turning in the their heads, cogitating what they want to say to me about my running.
In the end they always stay quiet and respectful, they probably give me the finger and call me a fag as I run by, but I maintain a strange sense of pride that I hold sway over them in this little mental shell game.
So, this one time, at badass camp...
I was running down the highline trail in phoenix when three guys made a human wall in the path so I couldn't pass. They beat me so bad I was in the hospital for three days. I never had even seen them before. They called me fag and all that crap and I said, " excuse me," and then they just beat me for no reason. The last thing I remember saying was "why?"
There are really bad people out there who will hurt you for whatever reason. I'm only 120 pounds and 16 years old. I had no chance and they knew it. I guess I should have just turned around before I came upon them. I can run fast enough to qualify for state and no way they would have caught me.
Little Bee wrote:
I was running down the highline trail in phoenix when three guys made a human wall in the path so I couldn't pass. They beat me so bad I was in the hospital for three days. I never had even seen them before. They called me fag and all that crap and I said, " excuse me," and then they just beat me for no reason. The last thing I remember saying was "why?"
There are really bad people out there who will hurt you for whatever reason. I'm only 120 pounds and 16 years old. I had no chance and they knew it. I guess I should have just turned around before I came upon them. I can run fast enough to qualify for state and no way they would have caught me.
Well, that took all the fun out of this thread.
jv football team blocked the track once as we were doing 400's on full sprint i knocked into 1 of the pathetic littlle freshmen who think there tough, as he got knocked back onto the ground i yelled get outta the f***ing way. They never blocked agin
when my high school coach was in college, he was running alongside a road. a car passed and someone threw a glass bottle and him and it shattered at his feet. when he caught back up to them at a the red light he bashed a dent in their hood.
and another time he was running on a narrow trail on a mountain and someone was coming from the other direction on a bike. and i guess when they crossed the other person lost control of their bike and fell off. the guy ended up cussing out my coach. so then my coach got mad and he threw the guys bike down the moutain. talk about owned
bloob wrote:
when my high school coach was in college, he was running alongside a road. a car passed and someone threw a glass bottle and him and it shattered at his feet. when he caught back up to them at a the red light he bashed a dent in their hood.
and another time he was running on a narrow trail on a mountain and someone was coming from the other direction on a bike. and i guess when they crossed the other person lost control of their bike and fell off. the guy ended up cussing out my coach. so then my coach got mad and he threw the guys bike down the moutain. talk about owned
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA I had that same very coach!!! Go Mr Young!
in high school to get back at other teams that said crap to us we put dead stuff in their lockerrooms. The jainitors discovered our dead skunk before the lax team could find it,but dead fish worked really good. it sparked a war between baseball and lacross, and the fish ended up in the vents making portions of the school smell real nice
Also have always been a fan of a good old fashion mooning, it never gets old.
Also anyone who spits on other people are pussies.
mansfieldstag wrote:
Driver cutting you up----
I would try to fashion a tourniquet to stop the bleeding and then maybe beat the guy with one of my severed limbs.
[quote]Little Bee wrote:
I was running down the highline trail in phoenix when three guys made a human wall in the path so I couldn't pass. They beat me so bad I was in the hospital for three days. quote]
Did you have any long term effects?
bump...
keep it going this is great