Is it by any chance this snail from adventure time?
Is it by any chance this snail from adventure time?
Bad Wigins wrote:
The best way to deal with this would be to hire a bodyguard to watch out for the snail, taking care to check your immediate vicinity every time you move, especially while you're sleeping. That would cost a lot of money, no doubt, but there's people who would do it for about 20 grand a year. So $1 mil for security. It's workable.
1) $20,000 a year will buy you a security guard, but not a very good one. He’ll probably take a lot of naps and text his girlfriend when he should be watching for snails.
2) $20,000 a year will not buy 24/7 coverage. Your snail guard will need breaks, ideally you’d have two guards at a time...even if you cover breaks and lunches yourself, you’re going to need 5 full time guards. That’s $100,000 a year, $200,000 for double coverage. This doesn’t include any health benefits or other perks you’ll be expected to provide.
OP: I’m sure I’ve seen this thread before, probably on this forum. It’s pretty much the plot of “It Follows” except instead of $5 million dollars, you get to have sex with a hot chick. And then I think a demon that moves considerably faster than a snail comes for you.
Need more info. Based on your premise I would only live as long as it takes a snail to cover 500 miles. So how long is that?
Pidaho wrote:
The top speed of a snail is 0.029 mph. 500 miles would be covered in 718 days, or around two years. So, you have to move every 1-2 years.
You're assuming that the snail knows where you are and is smart enough to track you down. This was not stated in the premise. The snail "can't be stopped," but this is of little relevance if it is not traveling in the correct direction.
Assuming a snail of normal intelligence, you could take the money and reasonable assume that the snail would never find you.
First off, I'd rather than $5M than have a snail chase me for life.
Second, is this a magical 'heat seeking' snail that can't be stopped and will always hut me down and knows where I am at all times?
Third, this is silly, but you already knew that.
Snails wrote:
it's within 500 square mile radius of you upon taking the money
Every time you move it's still starts within a 500 square mile radius of you. It could be closer than you think.
Discus.
Snails wrote:can't be killed
More importantly magical snail is flung around the world at my current moving speed and can't be killed? Lol. If I fly around the snail HAS to travel at flight speed. That landing is gonna be killer.
At least think this through a bit futher. Even just walking/running at a few mph - take a snail and throw it through trees/buildings and see how well it survives.
It might live forever but it ain't "walking" forever.
You get what you pay for wrote:
Bad Wigins wrote:
The best way to deal with this would be to hire a bodyguard to watch out for the snail, taking care to check your immediate vicinity every time you move, especially while you're sleeping. That would cost a lot of money, no doubt, but there's people who would do it for about 20 grand a year. So $1 mil for security. It's workable.
1) $20,000 a year will buy you a security guard, but not a very good one. He’ll probably take a lot of naps and text his girlfriend when he should be watching for snails.
2) $20,000 a year will not buy 24/7 coverage. Your snail guard will need breaks, ideally you’d have two guards at a time...even if you cover breaks and lunches yourself, you’re going to need 5 full time guards. That’s $100,000 a year, $200,000 for double coverage. This doesn’t include any health benefits or other perks you’ll be expected to provide.
OP: I’m sure I’ve seen this thread before, probably on this forum. It’s pretty much the plot of “It Follows” except instead of $5 million dollars, you get to have sex with a hot chick. And then I think a demon that moves considerably faster than a snail comes for you.
It Follows was awesome!
I would take the the money and get an arranged marriage and live somewhere exotic and spend my last monies on a reality film crew to document the saga. I wouldn't try to move out of the way of the snail but allow it to do it's thing. My sons and daughters through the marriage would be able to live well off the inheritance they get from the movie rights and the reality series, merchandise sales and tickets sold once we saw the snail within a couple days away. We'd setup cubicles with multi day essentials and sale tickets to viewers who want to watch the horrible act the snail does.
zzzz wrote:
David S wrote:
A garden snail can travel 0.029mph according to google.
Looks like that is a decimal point error that has been perpetuated. Typical is snail speed is 1 mm/s, or 0.002 mph, and a record that is often cited for a snail racing champion is 13 inches in 2 minutes 20 seconds, which works out to 2.3 mm/s or 0.0053 mph, or about twice as fast as the typical speed. The OP said usual snail speed, so go with the 0.002 mph.
Oh... That changes things. Maybe I'd take the money... 1 foot in 2 minutes means it could definitely creep into my house while I'm asleep though... and you'd still have to forget flying on planes...
You get what you pay for wrote:
Your snail guard will need breaks, ideally you’d have two guards at a time...even if you cover breaks and lunches yourself, you’re going to need 5 full time guards. That’s $100,000 a year, $200,000 for double coverage.
Use dogs instead. You can get 5 dachshunds cheap and train them to bark their asses off at anything resembling a snail.
Put it in a hamster ball and enjoy not having to worry about money for the rest of your life.