Fastest Simpson's Character

Disco Stu has been dancing nonstop since 1976; that has to count for some sort of aerobic capacity;

Sheer probability is in favor of one of the octuplets being fast.

Sideshow Mel has a runners build.

Uter has been carb-loading since season 4.

Gil's got hustle...

*Music*

Hens love roosters

Geese love ganders

everyone else loves Ned Flanders *music*

"Not Me" - Homer

*Music*

Everyone who counts loves Ned Flanders *music*

Ned "the man with the chest" would win. How old is he? He is a senior citizen and looks like he is in his 30's. He is in the best shape.

Groundskeeper Willie would win in a sprint, but he has too much muscle mass for any distance race. Smithers has the build but lets face it, hes gay. Disco Stu has plenty of aerobic activity but I would have to think that his long nights of partaaying would have its effect. I think its pretty obvious that Ned would win the masters catagory as he is always going out for his late night "fog walks" and the fact that he is a senior citizen who looks younger then Homer. Theres no way Mr. Burns could handle him he cant even make it up the stairs without being carried (unless he had an aphrodesiac made from the pockets of the rare pocket mouse which only existed for one week in 1947) (or the blood of a young boy) then he might be able to handle flanders. If your counting guest characters some people to consider would be Stan "the boy" taylor the minor league football star from homer loves flanders. Seems to be able to do everything well, or maybe the hippie boy lisa has a crush on in the in the giant tree episode. As far as regular characters Im going to have to go with Karl. He seems pretty athletic. For Dark Horses I would put lenny, Akira (very skinny, small frame), Frink, and Moe(used to be a boxer, had to do some road work.)On a side note, springfield is the "fattest town in the world" according to guiness so there arnt a whole lot of options. Im sure Ill think of some others later

Whoever said "Willie" is right. He's the fastest...naturally.

- Flagpole Willy

It would be a close race, but Dredrick Tatum would take Groundskeeper Willie in a sprint.

fly wrote:

It would be a close race, but Dredrick Tatum would take Groundskeeper Willie in a sprint.

I'm trying to recall a great Scottish sprinter and coming up with blanks...Cross, maybe, but a sprint?

Where ever Smithers finishes will be where Burns finishes because he will be carrying him.

alan wells. 1980 Gold

My vote goes for ned in the 'thon. There's a touch of Shorter about him.

Smithers, because he's a gym dandy(sublimating, you know ;-)

gorgie gecko wrote:

1980 Gold

I stand by my words, opinion unchanged. 1980 is the ironic twin of american sports "world champions".

Moe Sizlack would beat them all.

Remember when hs sprinted across town, knife in hand, to kill Jimbo Jones?

It was surely a world class effort. Nothing fuels the human spirit like a little hate, and Moe is full of hate.

Have you seen Ned Flanders without a sweater?

He's working out somewhere.

how bout on the women's side?

top 6:

1. Marge Simpson 21:00

2. Ms Krabappel 21:22

3. Helen Lovejoy 22:07

4. The stripper from season 2 22:09

5. Sherry 23:15

6. Terry 23:16

how does the town keep populated? there are like no women! the ones i left out: ms hoover and lunch lady doris.

DNR: Lisa Simpson: Too busy protesting something about the race that she doesn't like.

the race will finish at Moes with special performances by the Ramones and the Red Hot Chili Peppers.

how does the town keep populated? there are like no women! the ones i left out: ms hoover and lunch lady doris.

guy,

milhouses mom

skinners mom

that hot yuppie blonde lawyer/buisness exec

dr. hibert's wife

apu's wife

patti & selma

marge's mom

the crazy cat lady

sarah wiggim

that's just off the top of my head

Ashlee

Off topic:

One famous Scottish sprinter is Eric Liddell (ever seen Chariots of Fire?)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/timelines/scotland/eric_liddell.shtml

On Topic:

Smithers, Flanders, Willy in that order for a 5k