Maybe you can find an older Japanese man who can teach you to defend yourself.
Maybe you can find an older Japanese man who can teach you to defend yourself.
Don'tforget to grab your crotch while yelling gobble gobble, MF.
Just keep this song playing over and over in your head.
Go do his mother.
If you are going to get bashed you may as well give him a reason.
Smoke some crack and then say this in your most scary/crazy man voice:
"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and a finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee."
Just ignore them, and make a mental note to check up on how their lives are going 5 years from now. They'll be nobodies.
One word, NANCHUKS
Take a boxing class. A boxer who's been training for 3 months will beat someone from most other styles who's been training for 3 years. Almost guaranteed.
Troll Alert
Troll Alert
Troll Alert
Move to Chicago. Wait a couple of years. Learn car repair, specialize in station wagons. Hang out in Blues bars. Eventually she'll come in toting a few kids during a babysitter gig gone wrong. Get her out of the bind and back to the suburbs before her employers find out.
She'll be forever grateful, but don't be surprised if she turns into a suicidal whore in Vegas not too many years later.
Just take peace with the fact that he'll be burning in eternal agony in Hell when he dies, and he'll be begging for "one more chance!" as the flames torture him -- and God will just look down and laugh as the little pervert screams in absolute gutwrenching pain.
Anyone who gave the OP a serious response must be too young to have experienced the true greatness of the '80s.