I GET IT! You're conjoined twins and Carol is a mute, so you must speak for her! No wonder things are awkward for you.
I GET IT! You're conjoined twins and Carol is a mute, so you must speak for her! No wonder things are awkward for you.
I agree you should talk to your sister.
As for the husband, are there other things he does that make you think he's abusive? Sometimes when one behavior raises red flags it's been preceded by other types of behavior that you may have noticed in a less conscious way.
Here's a link with some warning signs that someone is being abusive:
http://www.saferchild.org/warning1.htm
While you may not be able to witness these on a day to day basis, if you see any of the signs in his behavior, there's reason for concern.
thats was just a great post!! Legit help on LetsRun!! Yeah!
I have a friend who will say, "I had my muffin, my coffee, and my paper this morning before taking my drive in to my school."
That's the way he relates to things.
Is he nuts or abusive? No, but he is insecure and needy.
It sounds to me like he may be trying to talk to you "man to man" about "my wife" as opposed to talking to you about "your sister" Carol. As in man, my wife is such a pain in the ass, I never get laid anymore. As opposed to, your twin sister Carol is a f***ing prude. Which of these would go over better?
campana wrote:
A friend of mine had a crush on a girl, but that girl had a boyfriend. My buddy said he knew she loved her boyfriend because she always referred to him as Robert, not as "my boyfriend". I always took notice of that after the conversation, and made an effort to refer to my SO by name rather than refer to her as a title. Your b-in-law sounds a little odd, but if he's really good to your sister and truly loves her, just let it slide.
One of my best friends has been dating a girl for the last month. All I know her as is "the redhead". I've never heard him say her name. I don't think the relationship is going to last.
I disagree with this idea.
When I'm talking about my girlfriend to people who know her, I use her name. When I'm talking about her to someone who might not know or forgotten because they've only met once (or not at all) I will refer to her as "my girlfriend".
So it's really a common courtesy for the other person, it doesn't say anything about our relationship.
On the other hand, I know someone who NEVER bothers to refer to anyone by their "title". They just throw out names, left and right. It's impossible to follow the story because you don't know who the F they're talking about. You can't tell a story like that, you have to introduce the characters.
It is not about using my sister over my wife at all. I question if this behavior is a portent of abuse. Carol is her name it identifies a person while my sister or my wife identify a relationship.
asdfsadfasd wrote:
It sounds to me like he may be trying to talk to you "man to man" about "my wife" as opposed to talking to you about "your sister" Carol. As in man, my wife is such a pain in the ass, I never get laid anymore. As opposed to, your twin sister Carol is a f***ing prude. Which of these would go over better?
asdfsadfasd wrote:
It sounds to me like he may be trying to talk to you "man to man" about "my wife" as opposed to talking to you about "your sister" Carol. As in man, my wife is such a pain in the ass, I never get laid anymore. As opposed to, your twin sister Carol is a f***ing prude. Which of these would go over better?
I agree with the OP's repsponse to your post. The OP obviously knows Carol here. This is not two coworkers talking about their wives when neither of them have met the other's wife. Sure, I say "my wife" to coworkers who dont know her, but to those who do, and especially to friends and FAMILY, I refer to her by her name.
Sounds like you should keep your nose out of his and his wife's business.
you guys are all lanced. stop doing that doo doo.
surprised me wrote:
I disagree with this idea.
When I'm talking about my girlfriend to people who know her, I use her name. When I'm talking about her to someone who might not know or forgotten because they've only met once (or not at all) I will refer to her as "my girlfriend".
So it's really a common courtesy for the other person, it doesn't say anything about our relationship.
On the other hand, I know someone who NEVER bothers to refer to anyone by their "title". They just throw out names, left and right. It's impossible to follow the story because you don't know who the F they're talking about. You can't tell a story like that, you have to introduce the characters.
I see what you're saying, but in my case, we all knew who Robert was, but we didn't know him very well. It wouldn't have been odd for her to say either "Robert" or "my boyfriend", but the fact that she called him by name made him seem more important to her. As I mentioned, it definitely made an impression on my friend that had the hots for her.
campana wrote:
As I mentioned, it definitely made an impression on my friend that had the hots for her.
"my friend that had the hots for her" = "me"
my wifes husband wrote:
It is not about using my sister over my wife at all. I question if this behavior is a portent of abuse. Carol is her name it identifies a person while my sister or my wife identify a relationship.
I think you're f***ing crazy and making a big deal over nothing.
Don't jump to conclusions. Maybe he has multiple wives and it's just easier to refer to each of them as "my wife" rather than try to remember all their names.
It could be something as innocent as that.
i know i am a dick wrote:
"my friend that had the hots for her" = "me"
Yep... I totally made that up to protect my image on this anonymous message board.
hey campana, i think i know the girl you are talking about...i had a crush on her too. alot of guys!
give me a clue to be sure we're talking about the same girl.
was she a petite runner?
OP: yeah, that's creepy. i would had for my brother in law to do that. spend some time with your sis to see what's going on.
ponytayne wrote:
Don't imply from what your brother in law says or doesn't say.
infer
4runner wrote:
Cookie is about to be sold to a sheik for three cows and a goat.
Three cows is a ripoff, hold out for three goats even if it means giving back a cow or two!
Oh, and I'd rather be called "my wife" anytime over being called "Cookie".
north east runner wrote:
hey campana, i think i know the girl you are talking about...i had a crush on her too. alot of guys!
give me a clue to be sure we're talking about the same girl.
was she a petite runner?
She was a petite southern gal, but not a runner. I knew her in 1995.
Sounds to me like he is just really happy about the fact that Carol is indeed "his wife". Maybe he just likes to say it because he is happy about the fact.