I have so much respect for anyone who endeavours to run the 26.2 miles required for a marathon and endures the unrelenting training that builds mind and body to the point where both are able to cross the finishing line. However, I have even more respect for said runner’s support network, the silent majority who must undergo an entirely different feat of endurance. One where domestic bliss is suddenly interrupted by the appearance of a piece of A4 paper on the fridge door. All hail the training schedule! “Where’s Mum?” the kids ask. Consult the Oracle,” I reply, pointing towards the sheet, head bowed.
My wife’s life is now owned by said schedule and by default so are ours..... There are, thankfully, rest days, but she seems to spend a good portion of these on various running forums, talking about the stack height of trainers – sorry, running shoes – and on Google, researching the best ways to stop thighs from chafing.
1. find a @%#@#$%@#ing passion for yourself. anything. please. my god please. life shouldn't begin and end with your daily responsibilities like the author seems to suggest.
2. don't base all of your happiness and "life" on another person's daily schedule, even a loved one/child/parent/spouse. you need things that are good for you, yourself, too, outside of that person.
3. in the case of a spouse, you knew who they were when you married them. now you are asking them to not be who they are, to be someone else who doesn't love running. that's not the person you chose - that's a fantasy person you're trying to create to fit your conveniences.
4. MOST IMPORTANTLY: stop vampirically leeching joy and triumph from the lives of people who commit themselves to great things.
There is some truth in the article. We don't realize how time consuming running is. Driving to a place to run, driving to races - getting there early to get a bib, warm up, etc. Hanging out after for awards. Supplemental exercises at home. Doubles.
Its constant too. Its not like barre, golf, or going to the gym where you can skip a day, go for a hike instead, go 4 days a week, just skip a meal instead, etc.
The only thing that compares is other endurance sports - and the only one I can think of at that level are cycling and triathlon. Running is actually less time consuming day to day than these, but maybe it makes up for it with more events. Cyclists and triathletes only compete a few times a year. Runners can compete almost every weekend.
Its for these reasons, that its hard to manage a relationship unless both individuals are in endurance sports.
Totally agree!
I'm currently single. (forevermore! )
But my last dating exploit was with a lady heavily into cycling. Member of a club, went on cycling holidays etc etc.
I genuinely think that the "understanding" of what each of our hobbies meant in terms of time commitment helped a lot! Plus it meant I always got at least 1 like on every Strava entry!
I have so much respect for anyone who endeavours to run the 26.2 miles required for a marathon and endures the unrelenting training that builds mind and body to the point where both are able to cross the finishing line. However, I have even more respect for said runner’s support network, the silent majority who must undergo an entirely different feat of endurance. One where domestic bliss is suddenly interrupted by the appearance of a piece of A4 paper on the fridge door. All hail the training schedule! “Where’s Mum?” the kids ask. Consult the Oracle,” I reply, pointing towards the sheet, head bowed.
My wife’s life is now owned by said schedule and by default so are ours..... There are, thankfully, rest days, but she seems to spend a good portion of these on various running forums, talking about the stack height of trainers – sorry, running shoes – and on Google, researching the best ways to stop thighs from chafing.
1. find a @%#@#$%@#ing passion for yourself. anything. please. my god please. life shouldn't begin and end with your daily responsibilities like the author seems to suggest.
2. don't base all of your happiness and "life" on another person's daily schedule, even a loved one/child/parent/spouse. you need things that are good for you, yourself, too, outside of that person.
3. in the case of a spouse, you knew who they were when you married them. now you are asking them to not be who they are, to be someone else who doesn't love running. that's not the person you chose - that's a fantasy person you're trying to create to fit your conveniences.
4. MOST IMPORTANTLY: stop vampirically leeching joy and triumph from the lives of people who commit themselves to great things.
Have other people found this? I was doing ironman when I met my now-wife and she seemed so good with the training etc then. This changed though after we got married. I haven't done an ironman since 2018, but there has always been a tension between me being 'present' at home and me training. I have only been just running for the last 3 years or so, but often my wife resents me going on training runs. She doesn't like me getting up too early to go run before work because it wakes her up, and when I finish work, the time is all about being with my daughter, cooking dinner etc. I sometimes train on my lunch break because this is the least likely to impact upon my family time.
do other people find that their spouse/partner resents them for their training and if so, does the other spouse/partner have a major passion of their own? i sometimes think that if my wife was extremely passionate about her own hobby and I gave her the space to do this, she wouldn't be so resentful.
The only thing that compares is other endurance sports - and the only one I can think of at that level are cycling and triathlon. Running is actually less time consuming day to day than these, but maybe it makes up for it with more events. Cyclists and triathletes only compete a few times a year. Runners can compete almost every weekend.
Clearly, you don't know much about cycling. Cyclists race more often than runners, sometimes more than once on the same weekend.
There is some truth in the article. We don't realize how time consuming running is. Driving to a place to run, driving to races - getting there early to get a bib, warm up, etc. Hanging out after for awards. Supplemental exercises at home. Doubles.
Its constant too. Its not like barre, golf, or going to the gym where you can skip a day, go for a hike instead, go 4 days a week, just skip a meal instead, etc.
The only thing that compares is other endurance sports - and the only one I can think of at that level are cycling and triathlon. Running is actually less time consuming day to day than these, but maybe it makes up for it with more events. Cyclists and triathletes only compete a few times a year. Runners can compete almost every weekend.
Its for these reasons, that its hard to manage a relationship unless both individuals are in endurance sports.
1. You don't have to drive to a place to run, unless extreme/dangerous conditions. I only do that when there are way too many stray dogs around.
2. Driving to races, yeah, OK, but you could turn that into a city break or run races close to home. And let's get real, unless you're Yuki Kawauchi, you don't race every weekend.
3. People are scrolling reels on social media more than they run, so gimme a break with this "wife's training has taken over our lives" nonsense. In the article it even says wife runs at 5am to minimize the impact on family. And what's the husband's complaint? Wife doesn't watch the latest Netflix drama? What a drama queen ... err ... drama king?!
Can someone briefly explain the reputation's of The Telegraph, The Guardian, The Times and The Daily Mail?
Guardian has a reputation for factual accuracy in news reporting, but is left-leaning in editorials/opinion columns, sometimes what many Americans would consider woke. It isn't owned/directed by billionaire vested interests - I think it is generally honest, even if I disagree with some of the opinion pieces.
Times is generally well respected on factual reporting, but right leaning in commentary/opinion and is owned by Rupert Murdoch.
Telegraph is more conservative than the Times, and more likely to crowbar identity politics into news articles.
Daily Mail is a batsh1t right-wing rag masquerading as a serious newspaper. Hypocrisies abound. Fewer aspirations to be high-brow and lots of click-bait articles. Home of the perpetually indignant.
I get it. Whether it be an obsessed runner, cyclist or triathlete who makes each move or conversation in their lives associated to the bleak goal they are chasing, they might as well be meth addicts. Especially when one has children, this behavior is simply selfish.
Personally, I have had, what would be considered, a successful stint in the 3 above sports. I understand none of it matters, therefore not worth of making it as an identity…..or even to talk about. These 3 sports take many hours to be good. It is part of standard issue to adapt to self importance. the bad thing is: When you are done, it is a long fall from the fairy tail.
My advice is to never abandon your good surroundings, especially kids, family etc. This is only exercise!
My wife wishes that I still ran marathons. I gave up marathons when I hit 47 and switched to playing golf. My son is a really good golfer now and we spend a ton of time on the course or the practice range. Most weekends are consumed with golf as we will play a practice round on Saturday and my son will have a tournament on Sunday.
When I was running marathons, I would do my training early in the morning and be home in time for breakfast. Same schedule for 5k to 1/2 races. I did 2-3 marathons a year and one was always my home race. That one had a 7 am gun and I was done in time to get brunch.
Taking a guess, based on how most families function, that woman has probably taken on the lion's share of the housework and childcare for years. Now, she's taking a few months to do something for herself. Any husband who loves his wife would just suck it up, be supportive l, and then they can talk about divisions of labour after the marathon is done. If she was doing a marathon every three months, then I can see some cause for complaint, but one marathon in a single year? Nah, just live with it.
When I was running marathons, I would do my training early in the morning and be home in time for breakfast. Same schedule for 5k to 1/2 races. I did 2-3 marathons a year and one was always my home race. That one had a 7 am gun and I was done in time to get brunch.
Exactly. Marathon training never interfered with raising my four kids or a busy work life. I got most of it done while everyone was still in bed!
Well, you can tell they don't have their kids in any sports because then this article would be about the kids sports taking over their lives lol. My kids sports schedules are much crazier than my 6-7 hours of weekly running.
If you cant give your wife an hour or 2 to workout/run a few times a week than go on somewhere. You men sit on the toilet longer. I can see if she's getting up at 9am and going running at 10:30 and gone for 3 hours everyday but we know most marathon moms are up at 4am starting their runs and home before the kids are even up half the time.
Can someone briefly explain the reputation's of The Telegraph, The Guardian, The Times and The Daily Mail?
Guardian has a reputation for factual accuracy in news reporting, but is left-leaning in editorials/opinion columns, sometimes what many Americans would consider woke. It isn't owned/directed by billionaire vested interests - I think it is generally honest, even if I disagree with some of the opinion pieces.
Times is generally well respected on factual reporting, but right leaning in commentary/opinion and is owned by Rupert Murdoch.
Telegraph is more conservative than the Times, and more likely to crowbar identity politics into news articles.
Daily Mail is a batsh1t right-wing rag masquerading as a serious newspaper. Hypocrisies abound. Fewer aspirations to be high-brow and lots of click-bait articles. Home of the perpetually indignant.
This is mostly true, but over the last five years, the Telegraph has gone over the edge. It's descended into truly mental territory. Some of the columnists would be ranting on street corners if they weren't from wealthy backgrounds. The Telegraph used be right-wing but respected, now, it's a joke. Not helped by losing some of its best sports reporters as well.
The Mail is an even bigger joke. Full of trash aimed at driving clicks from the US far-right because that's where the money is. That said, there's still a few good sports reporters there. It's just a shame that they're tied to that absolute rag of a publication.
1. find a @%#@#$%@#ing passion for yourself. anything. please. my god please. life shouldn't begin and end with your daily responsibilities like the author seems to suggest.
2. don't base all of your happiness and "life" on another person's daily schedule, even a loved one/child/parent/spouse. you need things that are good for you, yourself, too, outside of that person.
3. in the case of a spouse, you knew who they were when you married them. now you are asking them to not be who they are, to be someone else who doesn't love running. that's not the person you chose - that's a fantasy person you're trying to create to fit your conveniences.
4. MOST IMPORTANTLY: stop vampirically leeching joy and triumph from the lives of people who commit themselves to great things.
Have other people found this? I was doing ironman when I met my now-wife and she seemed so good with the training etc then. This changed though after we got married. I haven't done an ironman since 2018, but there has always been a tension between me being 'present' at home and me training. I have only been just running for the last 3 years or so, but often my wife resents me going on training runs. She doesn't like me getting up too early to go run before work because it wakes her up, and when I finish work, the time is all about being with my daughter, cooking dinner etc. I sometimes train on my lunch break because this is the least likely to impact upon my family time.
do other people find that their spouse/partner resents them for their training and if so, does the other spouse/partner have a major passion of their own? i sometimes think that if my wife was extremely passionate about her own hobby and I gave her the space to do this, she wouldn't be so resentful.
TBF, triathletes deserve it. how many times a day do you tell someone that you ran Ironmans?
OP-- just support her, it will be over before your know it