Having a baby with a woman who is 40-41? Worried about health of the child...

This reads as so unamerican. You can't use science to improve your chances of a successful birth or lower genetic issues. Gotta wing it and deal with all the issues that comes later.

How else are hospitals going to make money off ya down the road. It's the american way to be broke and in debt.

Join the party.

Brought to you by the department of sarcasm (which doesn't have to worry about being unfunded - we already are!)

Is it possible to know whether you'll "have that unconditional love" before the baby is born?

My wife was 43 when our second son was born. He was and continues to be fine.

This is something you should talk to your girlfriend and her doctor about. Not a message board on a running website.

Yeah don't overthink it. Take the decision without considering age. But use early screening and be ready to take decisions. Kids are great, you will be fine.

My wife was born in 1970 when her mom was 44. Both mom and child are/where fine.

My MIL just passed at 97, healthy physically and mentally till the end

Re Down syndrome: all women in the US pregnant with singletons or twins are now offered and advised to get a NIPT blood test very early in pregnancy to screen for fetal chromosome abnormalities including the one that causes DS.

The NIPT blood test analyzes fetal DNA in a pregnant woman’s serum from a sample of blood drawn from her arm in the standard way. The NIPT can performed as early as the 9th week of pregnancy, though most women usually get it a bit later.

The basic NIPT blood test screens fetuses for Trisomy 21 (Down syndrome), Trisomy 18 (Edwards syndrome) and Trisomy 13 (Palau syndrome). The basic NIPT also analyzes fetal DNA to find out the sex of the fetus and to check for unusual sex chromosome patterns such as 45,X0 (Turner syndrome); 47,XXX (Triple X syndrome); 47;XXY (Klinefelter syndrome); 47,XYY (Jacob’s syndrome); and 48,XXYY.

Developed in the early 2000s and introduced for widespread commercial use in 2011, the NIPT blood test originally was recommended only for women at high risk of birth defects because of their age (35 and up) or family or personal health history. But since 2020, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists has recommended that all pregnant women in the US get the NIPT early in pregnancy regardless of their age and risk profile.

Use of the NIPT is increasing each year, with especially high rates of uptake in the USA and certain countries n Europe like Belgium.

In 2019, 49% of pregnant women in the US had the NIPT blood test. In 2022, 55-60% of pregnant women in the US had the NIPT.

The majority of private and public health insurance plans in the US cover the NIPT blood test and the various other kinds of prenatal diagnostic testing that are in wide use in much of the world nowadays.
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As for autism: the causes of autism are extremely complex and not yet fully understood. 200 to 1,000 different genes have been identified as definitely or potentially involved in autism.

80% of cases of autism are believed to be the result of genetic inheritance, meaning due to genes that are passed down to offspring by the parents.

But the research that’s been done to date indicates that when autism is due to genetic inheritance, fathers contribute more of the genetic material involved in autism than mothers do.

When autism is due to di novo mutations of genes that occur after fertilization, rather than gene mutations inherited from one or both of the parents, the greatest risk appears to come from the father being of advanced age, not the mother.

Please do let us know if he develops a mental disability 🫠

So termination of the less desirable is ok with you? Asking for a German friend.

This is the point I was trying to make. Thanks for expressing it in such clear and concise terms.

If you are so weak that you have to “use early screening and be ready to take decisions” (which I interpret as termination if possible outcome is not to your liking). Than I suggest making the decision to get married and pregnant BEFOREHAND, that way no one is harmed by anyone else selfish decision

This is such a despicable comment. RunRagged just posted some factual information. Let the potential parents make an informed decision, which is tricky enough to take without being called a nazi if you opt for an early abortion.

He's twenty eight and works as a researcher at an Ivy League university, was just admitted to a couple doctoral programs, both of which will give him money, and has run marathons well under 2:40. Now please don't disappoint me by failing to say that these things are evidence of a mental disability.

I am not getting your point. Obviously you need to be pregnant before you make a prenatal screening. With regard to the decision of possible early abortion, the future parents might have a certain opinion before pregnancy, another before the screening and yet another after the screening. Ethical considerations related to these decisions are grossly mischaracterised if you believe this is just about selfishness. We are not judging you if you decide not to have a prenatal NIPT blood test, so don’t judge or try to impose your beliefs system on those who decide otherwise.

My mother had two children after 40. (I was not one of them.) Both of them are very normal. I had an ancestor whose 19th child was born when he was 82 and his (second) wife was 45.

I am concerned about your desire/need/requirement to have a 'perfect' baby. We all have defects to some degree. That doesn't make us any less human.

Lol, I was being sarcastic, poking fun at your wording “continues to be fine”. If there was any risk for a mental disability it would have shown up long ago.

another example why sarcasm never works over the internet.

Never called anyone a nazi. What is despicable is suggesting that opting for an early abortion is the right/best thing. I only offered another view for reflection. Is terminating a pregnancy JUST because the future potential is not what the parent wants/thinks. Test CAN be wrong. When my wife was pregnant with our second child, a routine test made Dr tell us she would have Spina Bifida and made suggestions

guess what, test and drs were wrong. My daughter is completely fine physically and mentally. Currently a double engineering major and mathematics minor at one of the best U.S. colleges. Oh yeah, playing sport at a D1 school

FIFY