She trying to friend zone me ?

Maybe they should be. You do realize the rate of depression for women is twice that of men, right?

Open image

are you suggesting you "don't roll by" just going out with someone and seeing what happens? this is like a massive percentage of how people meet someone. requiring a commitment for a date is cart before horse. you want the dates to decide if you're having fun. and that's making it all formal. a lot of college type "dating" is you see someone at a party, and then maybe at a game, and you hang out, and like maybe it evolves into something more like dating, but you just socialize and see at first.

i might respect more if it's, not going to date someone who says they have a significant other, this is a solid principle, i have told someone before if you break up with x come find me.

Maybe she has a girlfriend?

Anyway, I agree very much with the person who said go and just see what it's like in person. You've been very clear that you don't want friendship, you don't want to date her if she has a boyfriend or girlfriend (which is by far the right decision) so you've been upfront. Just see what she's like. I don't really understand the bit where she says she's confused but I suppose you can find out in person which is better than speaking via messenger.

I hope that you have fun.

this is like HS mentality. most college and adult relationships, my experience, you like hang out in some way socially, often in a group, you like them, you see them a few more times, ok, i'd like this person around more, and then maybe one of you gets attracted and goes in for a kiss. it's like 15 year old stuff to be worried about the definitions, unless she's married or living with or in something serious. you want to be around this person and it naturally goes where it wants to.

friends first is better anyway because you figure out if you like their company, or at least get a decent idea. you already have a decent idea if you vibe.

i worry we're wandering into one of these arrogant incel things where she's just supposed to by osmosis know what a great catch you are, commit immediately. to be fair at some point you may only want to be spending repeat visits on someone who radiates a level of affection and interest, but that's not a first date decision if you want to have many first dates.

Or men are way less likely to admit they are depressed and seek help. I doubt this chart is accurate. What is an actual statistic is that men die by suicide 4x more than women. I would bet more men are depressed than women.

I dunno about your friend, but I only suggest meeting someone for coffee if I don't really want to spend time with them. It's over quick and in a neutral setting. And if it's in the morning or around lunchtime, I don't have to dread it all day. I'd keep your expectations low.

If she said she's already seeing someone - is this the kind of woman you want? someone who will cheat on their bf?

Plus, do you wanna get in trouble w another guy? If she dumps him for you, he's gonna be pissed!

it’s impossible to be friend zoned by someone else, you can only do it to yourself.

make a move and see what happens.

Meet up and see how it goes. The people who are suggesting it's a big leap for her to decide if she wants to date you or not just off of some DMs are absolutely correct. A reminder that this goes both ways, how can you be confident that you want to date her? Meet up, see if you can even tolerate each other for the time it takes to drink a coffee, and go from there.

I honestly hope it works out and you find true love and happiness with each other, but if you even want a shot for that to happen you gotta chill out and let things just unfold naturally.

Women like jerks. Stand her up. Message later and say you got busy or forgot. Let that sit for two days then ask her out.

Men want a physical harem of women. Women want an emotional harem of men. It's her prerogative to not date you. It's your prerogative to not get strung along as the frustrated friend getting nothing in return.