I got married 19 years ago. I've pretty much lost touch with my best man. I'm closer with one of my groomsmen, but the others, not so much. Once my wife and I got married, we moved out of state and I started a new job far away and things faded. I spend most of my social time with my wife, kids, coworkers and neighbors in the town we moved to.
I'm not married but was a best man for a guy that used to be a friend of mine. We aren't friends anymore because he found out that I was screwing his wife.
adulterous andy wrote:
I'm not married but was a best man for a guy that used to be a friend of mine. We aren't friends anymore because he found out that I was screwing his wife.
You should be hung up by your Buster Browns.
Good Will Running wrote:
How did you know each other? How long had you known each other when you got married? How long have you been married? Do you remain close, like message or call each other somewhat regularly? Just SM friends who give each other likes and send birthday messages? Have you basically grown apart and never hear from each other anymore?
Mine was a college running buddy, we'd known each other about 8 years when I got married 10 years ago. We'd send each other birthday wishes for a while but that sort of fizzled out right before COVID. I see his Insta posts on occasion but don't really know what's going on in his life now and vice versa. He's a good guy and I'm glad we were close at one point, I guess I'm coming to grips that it's inevitable that anyone outside of family will probably fade from your life over time.
Love all the guys in my party. Been married 7 years, have known all the guys in my party for 20 plus years, some 25 now. My best man was a 3 year roommate in college. Have numerous group texts that include some or all of the guys that we use on a weekly basis to talk about things we are doing, personal lives, talk sht, randomly send embarrassing stories we remembered about another, professional running/cycling. We get together for yearly backpacking trips, ski trips. Not everyone can attend but it is always on the calendar. Ran with some, others just developed into friends outside of the team and we meshed well.
He was my best friend in highschool/ after highschool. He was always one of thr biggest true narassists ive ever met. He eventually turned in to a complete raging alcoholic. We all put up with it for a lot of years. Ironically, after he got sober, we were all old enough that we couldn't take his narassasim any longer. His sobriety seemed to make it worse. His attitude before was "its not my fault... I'm an alcoholic, you just dont understand. " It turned in to "nothing is my fault. After all, I'm sober."
Great thread topic. My best man and I have been friends since middle school (over 25 years), played in bands together in high school and college. We lived close to each other until about twenty years ago, when he had a family tragedy. He ended up moving out west (coincidentally to the same city my other groomsman moved to), to be close to other family.
We have visited each other a few times throughout the years. We talk probably three or four times a year, and text every now and then. I build and sell guitars, and recently built him one. It was probably my most rewarding build - to know that one of my best friends will get to enjoy it for the rest of his life. Wish we could spend more time together, but so is life.
Oh and as an aside, he called me a slut in his speech at my wedding.
I didn't have a wedding party at my wedding, but I was a in the wedding parties for six of my friends about 20 years ago. (I think they all had their brothers as best men.) Two I play cards with online across the country every week or two and see every year or so, two I talk to a few times a year and see every year or two (but they still feel like good friends), one I text with fairly often and see every year or two, and one I see a few times a week and is my closest friend.
It depends on how much you value friendship. I have seven long-term(20 years plus) friends. All married and we find time to talk and keep in touch. Generally speaking, the American culture doesn't value friendship after marriage. It's a huge mistake. Many marriages will fail, but a true friend is for life.
We have been best friends since we were in high school ( almost 45 years ago). He is my kid'
s godfather. We usually text once or twice a week. Still very close.
Got married in the Philippines many years ago, best man was my local coworker because no one from the US could make it there. Nice guy, but we lost contact when I returned to US. Have not seen him in over 30 years.
I was the best man for my cousin who is two years younger. He asked me over both his brothers, a major honor. We were in rock bands together in high school, and stayed close even when I moved away for college. We both follow MMA closely (been trying to get him into track forever), and also play in the same D&D campaign every Thursday - that’s been running for about 4 years.
“We didn’t choose to be family, but we did choose to be friends” is our catchphrase.
It was my brother and the other groomsman was her brother. Semi-close to both of them.
Go with family. We didn't have any falling out with friends, but lost connection with all our age 22 friends after a few years.
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