Why do middle aged married men often give up on staying fit?

What does that have to do? Someone has no time for an hour a day? Do push ups in front of the tv for christs sake

Some of us have fulfilling marriages which aren't based on looks, and we maintain attraction even as we age and change and go through phases. If I'm responding to the shallow tone of the OP, that's the answer.

Work...kids...metabolism...increased responsibilities...periods of dealing with illnesses and eventual death of your parents and prior generation close family members. Wait until you have the stress of carrying your job, your kids, your marriage, while watching a parent whither away while you're advocating for them in our medical system for 3-4 months and see what that does to your personal time to work out.

In my late 20s I averaged 100-120mpw. My super power was I never got injured. Starting in my late 30s that changed and I began having a series of near-constant hip issues that have not continued for a decade. I'm doing better now than most of this period, but still can't remember the last time I hit 35 mpw, not from laziness but just because I only get so much in before some injury kicks in and I need a couple days off. Currently nursing a hip flexor after completing a progression run with my son.

I raced at 145-150lbs, topped out at 198lbs before I decided it was ridiculous and things needed to change, and currently running about 170lbs. Not exactly out of shape considering I'm still capable of 18 flat at 47 years on such minimal mileage.

Ironically I've been held back by giving back to the sport. I started coaching XC this year and while I run with the team it's rarely what is best for me to be doing -- like parenting, I'm putting others first and doing what's best for them. So I typically get some running in but I wouldn't really call it training.

Okay..

Sounds like someone has a superiority complex and is unnecessarily fixated on others.

Like others have said. The reasons involve getting busy with kids and jobs, perhaps older parents who must be cared for, injuries, or a metabolism that overrides better intentions.

I'm 67 and running is still fun. I'll run a hilly 8-miler tomorrow morning and think about you as I chew down a bowl of yogurt, blueberries, and nails for breakfast.

if you're married you're not going to be chasing women...not as much of a point

westerners are head cases.

you want to stay in shape and eat good foods, end of story, else you life will be miserable sooner than later.

and getting fat, that is when you have lost your mind.

what about the sex with the wife?

You left off the biggest factor: injuries. Once they start, the things you mention make one's fitness get squeezed out more and more.

See thread on post-nuptial shutoff

Good question, as evidenced by the 7 pages of replies. I'm in the midst of intense weight-loss efforts right now.

Starting in my 50's, I began seeing a direct link between my weight and the frequency and severity of plantar fasciitis and other injuries. At best I was 20 pounds heavier than my teenage racing days, but at anything more than that, I couldn't stay healthy and couldn't race fast. I agree with the people who point to kids and work stress -- but I also like your mindset of choosing a career that suits your very sensible health priorities. For me, having kids was a wonderful but completely exhausting endeavor. When you don't sleep, you can't stay fit.

I also have had a bad habit of binge eating unhealthy food for two months every winter from Halloween to Christmas. When I got injured a few years ago, I added weight. Now that I'm healthy again and trying to get back to racing I've had to cut out almost all alcohol and snacking, and it's pretty unpleasant. At the same time, it feels great to have the goal of masters PBs in sight.

I'm 66 and run 5-7 days a week. I'm slower than I used to be and I don't run as far but I love it.

You're not going to find one answer. There are so many factors that, if I can be so bold, add up to "life got in the way" and/or "Aging," and/or supportive family, etc.

A massive advantage is finding something you love to do that also gets you fit. Easier said than done. It is difficult to keep motivation up if the goal is just to look good or "to be healthy." Long after running ended for me I discovered cycling. A ton of people in the groups I train with are former runners. No pounding. Can afford a bike. Nonetheless, I have not been this fit since college and I can't wait to ride! I wish cycling had come to me sooner. Had I not discovered it I would probably be in the category of chunky middle aged men.

Not doubting you or being obtuse, but how are you able to get so fit cycling? Don't you need to be riding for hours every day? I am genuinely curious how you fit in the cycling, how much you do, etc.

Wear and tear. Fatigue as a result of wearvand tear. And family obligations.

I spent hours driving from place to place taking the kids to sport, and advice moved up the ladder, I spent more hours at work.

And of course, as I aged, my sexual prowess became greater, and servicing the Wife's needs ate into my jogging time.

Are you saying I'm obtuse or you? Not sure I understand what you're trying to say.

In short, I can see how you would think that but I'm not talking about bike riding. Cycling. Yes, you can ride hours per day (completely besides the point) which I do in the summer. But, you don't need to. There are good programs with a lot of "sweat spot" and interval training. Personally, I do 5k-8k per year but a good amount of interval and quality work. This year I'm going to lower my mileage a bit and focus more on quality work.

The guys I ride with probably average 200 miles a week or less. This includes a current pro and a couple former professionals. I go 5-days a week both indoor (on a trainer) and outdoor. Outdoor I usually hit a 300 mile week (18-20 hours maybe) and its so much fun I can't begin to explain. Anyway, we race a couple+ 100 centuries per year, do
criteriums, road races, etc. Group rides are frisky and we all complete over segments. We go hard on a regular basis even if not racing.

Yes, you can have a pot belly and be strong because you're training a specific muscle group and system. Almost all the super strong guys are not like that and fit. Some strength work too but that is in service of the bike. Cycling got me fit in my 50s.

Seems like the men here make a lot of excuses. Yeah, life does become more difficult as your responsibilities increase but there is no way that people cannot put forth the bare minimum to live a healthy lifestyle. Kids, jobs, marriages, etc. If you value your health you will make time for it. The best parents do it in a way that involves the kids because they need exercise and health too. It's just a skill issue OP, to answer your question. The same people complaining here are the same ones who never broke 15 in a 5K, or if they were in the hunter-gatherer ages "man that deer was just too fast, or the sabertooth came in and third-partied my loot." Not to mention, being out of shape is just selfish. You would let a hooligan or a gang member be physically superior to you and you could do nothing to prevent them from harming your family? Yeah no thanks. I'll be 60 and going sub 17 probably. sub 19 at 70. At 80, sub 22. 90 i'll be faster than you guys in your 40's.

Based on this post I suggest you get out of your teenage years before you claim how fast you're going to be in your 80's.