How to tell your hs “track coach” you are training with a real track coach

Your team doesn’t have a distance coach?

One of my favorite things here is when people ask for advice, get some feedback they don't want to hear, then it's all about "trolls".

I am giving you my honest advice based on my experience: this scenario has conflict written all over it. Just be prepared for it. And honestly, if you think you're being respectful towards the head coach, just go reread your original post and ask yourself if you respect this person or not.

jacks21 wrote:

The hs coach knows very little about how to really train for each distance. Every athlete he “coaches” does the same thing.

You literally put the word "coaches" in quotes. Yes, you clearly think highly of this person.

Nope. With only about 120 kids in the whole school, the school barely can afford one.

Just tell your head coach you are training with coach js and that the head coach will get the glamour from it! He will be pleased and happy.

Who the F cares what your high school coach thinks!? It's not like you're in some kind of obligatory relationship with him. If you're agonizing over this, you're way too emotionally involved with this person and it's not healthy or normal. Tell your parents about your concerns and how fearful your coach makes you feel about approaching him with the truth.

Here’s the truth: no. I don’t respect him as a coach. Lots of coaches can have great personalities, be upstanding individuals, but they can still suck at coaching. So no. I don’t respect an a$$hole who won’t show up to the indoor meets to time his distance athlete. No. I don’t respect an a$$hole who only coaches the football/basketball athletes. No. I don’t respect whistle twirling a$$holes. But, I’m willing to act civil, be tactful, put on a happy face, be an adult, and avoid interfering with his practices, whatever that may entail.

Some input from a high school coach of almost 30 years : stick with the private coach and don’t have your daughter go out for the high school team . It will be better for everyone . I’ve seen this played out too many times before and it never ends well,

1. If the high school coach has had success , which it sounds like he has, he won’t let your daughter on the team and let her do her own workouts . If he does that , everyone on the team will expect to be able to skip practice , Your daughter can’t get special treatment.

2. If your daughter does both the workouts of the team coach and the private coach she will blow up.

3. If your daughter gets on the team eventually the coach will do something you don’t like, maybe run a sprint or pole vault and you will go nuclear . Go to the AD, then the principal and eventually the school board and try to get the coach fired . There will be a lot of commotion. But ( and this is a big point) you will become “those parents “ who the coaches, every other parent and every kid on the team hates . That probably won’t bother you but the child of “ those parents “ becomes immensely disliked by her teammates because she is getting special treatment because her parents act like jerks. Believe me it happens .

When the whole Mary Cain story came out this year , nobody from Bronxville spoke in support of her. Not because she is a bad person but rumor has it her parents did the aforementioned when she went to school there .

4. If she is doing well with the private coach stick with him . It will give you some autonomy you won’t have if she was on the high school team.

Well said:

"But, I’m willing to act civil, be tactful, put on a happy face, be an adult, and avoid interfering with his practices, whatever that may entail."

1. No wonder she improved if she hadn't been involved in the sport before, it's called the novice effect. It's no secret exercise improves mental health.

2. If it's she - no wonder she doesn't play football. Not many girls do. There are few explosive sprint sports for female athletes. Soccer is about the only true sprint one with counter attacks. She'll be fine .

3. Good - make sure she loves the sport and doesnt get burned out. I played a sport at the D1 level and after 4 years, I was beyond over it, I hated training, I hated the sport. It took me three years to pick it up for fun again.

4. Be honest. I own a training facility and work with outside athletes. I have a great relationship with their coaches because they tell me what their goals are and I program around it to work in synergy with their programs and not fight for resources.

It's a bit much to call people out for negativity when you initiated the discussion by disparaging a high school coach whom I gather your daughter has not yet worked with. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that your concern for your daughter temporarily clouded your judgement. Do you have any personal knowledge of the school coach's training program, or are you basing your opinion on past results and/or word of mouth? I have been both a concerned parent and a high school coach, so I can understand both sides of the issue. My suggestion would be for your child to tell her new coach that she has been participating in summer track, and that she is really looking forward to representing the team in distance events. See how it plays out. If worse comes to worse, it's really not hard to tweak a workout to tailor it to your daughter's training needs while being respectful of the need to maintain team dynamics.

[quote]jacks21 wrote:

Here’s the truth: ......::So no. I don’t respect an a$$hole who won’t show up to the indoor meets to time his distance athlete. No. I don’t respect an a$$hole who only coaches the football/basketball athletes. No. I don’t respect whistle twirling a$$holes.

But, I’m willing to act civil, be tactful, put on a happy face, be an adult, and avoid interfering with his practices,

That sounds sincere ????

I worked with 2 athletes the entire season but a 3rd one came on board about halfway through the season, so 2-3.

BackandForth wrote:

I worked with 2 athletes the entire season but a 3rd one came on board about halfway through the season, so 2-3.

It took you 16 months to come up with that reply. You should have said one of the kids was a pork offal burrito.

I agree with not telling the coach, So many HS & MS coaches have a coaching job for a paycheck and convinced the AD they did a 5k once. I know a guy coaching 4 from our local HS team and they are state ranked runners. HS coach gets the accolades and a $6K/10 week contract because he works within the school, does the admin stuff and schedules the bus transportation but could not tell you a thing about splits or tempo runs, just believes he is "coaching"

Steiner Math wrote:

BackandForth wrote:

I worked with 2 athletes the entire season but a 3rd one came on board about halfway through the season, so 2-3.

It took you 16 months to come up with that reply. You should have said one of the kids was a pork offal burrito.

It's because I have a life and often don't waste it spending hours on LetsRun message boards, but did happen to see where you replied. I get the joke. Nice. As a 'private' coach that year, I was approached in early July of the summer before that season by two of the athletes. A 3rd athlete eventually got into shape enough to handle some of their training about early October and asked to finish the season under me. Had a great relationship with the coach of school. The head coach of the school was great at time management, motivation, and willingness to learn, all the logistical stuff. Better than me! But she realized I had the physiology background and since all three athletes were seniors and 90seconds faster than rest of team, she respected them enough to let them get the extra help. One kid won state, another was 10th (all-state), and another just missed all state in 12th if I remember. Years later another kid at the same school came out of nowhere and asked for my help. With all the crazy Covid crap, the coach there now (normally a control freak from most reports I hear about him) allowed some leeway since practices could only be like M-W-F during the past school year. I was able to help the kid for about 6-7months. He knocked 70seconds off his 5K. But I tell coaches running isn't rocket science. Just got to learn how to help an athlete read/feel his or her body and realize you don't have to kill it every single workout/race. Then teach them some basic nutrition and pre/post workout recovery stuff and watch them improve....

jacks21 wrote:

We have a personal track coach that is extremely good. They know their stuff. This is the first year for our kid to do hs track. The hs coach knows very little about how to really train for each distance. Every athlete he “coaches” does the same thing. How does my kid tactfully tell him she has been training with a real coach in the off season?

What makes you think the personal track coach actually knows their stuff? Just because you like them more?