no coach should be touching any girl's butt....period. At the very least he should not be head coach
no coach should be touching any girl's butt....period. At the very least he should not be head coach
Kevin Hadsell wrote:
one thing to add here wrote:
I noticed in the article the athletes all call him "Coach Matt". It may seem harmless, but that's a red flag already. Absolutely doesn't mean the guy is going to be a problem for sure, but in my experience coaches that ask or allow themselves to be addressed by "coach first name" instead of "coach" or "coach last name" or "last name" end up trying to be friends or are looked at as friends and the boundaries start getting a lot more fuzzy on one or both sides.
If he wants to do a better job, stop with the "Coach Matt" nonsense.
I completely agree with this comment. If you are a coach, you need to be either "Coach" or "Coach [Last Name]". it is one of the first steps to continuing to create the necessary gap and boundaries from the jump. They are not your friends. You are not their friend. You are not their uncle, their Dad or their buddy. You are their coach.
Good point.
~Kevin
Coach Mark Wetmore goes by Mark. Worked for him.
Wetmore is also like 60 years old. And not to state the obvious but he lives with his former runner. So I guess it does work for him.
Positive Contribution wrote:
Kevin Hadsell wrote:
I completely agree with this comment. If you are a coach, you need to be either "Coach" or "Coach [Last Name]". it is one of the first steps to continuing to create the necessary gap and boundaries from the jump. They are not your friends. You are not their friend. You are not their uncle, their Dad or their buddy. You are their coach.
Good point.
~Kevin
Coach Mark Wetmore goes by Mark. Worked for him.
Mark Wetmore also married one of his athletes so it's maybe not the best example.....
This is how it’s done if you’re a coach
Kevin Hadsell wrote:
one thing to add here wrote:
I noticed in the article the athletes all call him "Coach Matt". It may seem harmless, but that's a red flag already. Absolutely doesn't mean the guy is going to be a problem for sure, but in my experience coaches that ask or allow themselves to be addressed by "coach first name" instead of "coach" or "coach last name" or "last name" end up trying to be friends or are looked at as friends and the boundaries start getting a lot more fuzzy on one or both sides.
If he wants to do a better job, stop with the "Coach Matt" nonsense.
I completely agree with this comment. If you are a coach, you need to be either "Coach" or "Coach [Last Name]". it is one of the first steps to continuing to create the necessary gap and boundaries from the jump. They are not your friends. You are not their friend. You are not their uncle, their Dad or their buddy. You are their coach.
Good point.
~Kevin
This has got to be some of the stupidest things I have read here in a long time. So if a coach allows themselves to be called by their first name then they are going to slap someone's ass. It is completely possible to be called by any name and still maintain an appropriate relationship. One has nothing to do with the other.
Hateraid wrote:
Kevin Hadsell wrote:
I completely agree with this comment. If you are a coach, you need to be either "Coach" or "Coach [Last Name]". it is one of the first steps to continuing to create the necessary gap and boundaries from the jump. They are not your friends. You are not their friend. You are not their uncle, their Dad or their buddy. You are their coach.
Good point.
~Kevin
This has got to be some of the stupidest things I have read here in a long time. So if a coach allows themselves to be called by their first name then they are going to slap someone's ass. It is completely possible to be called by any name and still maintain an appropriate relationship. One has nothing to do with the other.
Yeah I agree. I don't know why Kevin is still allowed to post here. Kevin did stuff that was 200x worse than what the Lehigh coach did.
I think what he’s saying is that there shouldn’t be such a friendly familiarity.
Familoarity wrote:
I think what he’s saying is that there shouldn’t be such a friendly familiarity.
I understand what he was saying but it's still stupid. You can be in a friend-like coaching relationship without hooking up or touching butts. Coaches have their own styles but that doesn't make them pedophiles or ass slappers.
Hateraid wrote:
Familoarity wrote:
I think what he’s saying is that there shouldn’t be such a friendly familiarity.
I understand what he was saying but it's still stupid. You can be in a friend-like coaching relationship without hooking up or touching butts. Coaches have their own styles but that doesn't make them pedophiles or ass slappers.
Fair enough. You don’t have to agree with him. Doesn’t make what he is saying wrong or right. Your opinion is that it doesn’t matter. As a coach i would agree with him. We are both right because it’s only an opinion.
Buddy York wrote:
This is how it’s done if you’re a coach
https://youtu.be/JMDzJl9OdeE
The beatings will continue until morale improves.
Familoarity wrote:
I think what he’s saying is that there shouldn’t be such a friendly familiarity.
I agree with this if we're talking about lecherous men. Normal men can easily maintain friendly familiarity with female athletes and mentees.
Mostly men but some females as well. But mostly men.
Ot just men wrote:
Mostly men but some females as well. But mostly men.
very true.
So the Cornell coach decides to retire from coaching in June. Graduation was in May. Does he honesty want us to believe that there was absolutely zero going on before that graduation date? I’m not saying there was or wasn’t but that’s not a lot of time to suddenly realize.
Positive Contribution wrote:
Jefe in the CO wrote:
Maybe say this out loud and then determine if this has the potential of pouring gasoline on the fire. Maybe a reasonably seasoned female would be a better solution.
For the folks complaining about Bowerman - what a bunch of pussies. I realize that this is a new age but we weren’t like you guys back in the day.
So submitting to a grown man peeing on you was what you tough guys did back in the day? Weird but ok.
Who said anything about "submitting"? Anyway, let he has not peed on someone in the shower cast the first stone.
Jefe in the CO wrote:
Positive Contribution wrote:
So submitting to a grown man peeing on you was what you tough guys did back in the day? Weird but ok.
Who said anything about "submitting"? Anyway, let he has not peed on someone in the shower cast the first stone.
Stones, rocks, bricks, concrete blocks coming your way.
Peeing on someone in the shower or anywhere else has never occurred to me to be something to do.
When I first heard about Bowerman Pis in 1977 it made his creepy stare have meaning.
I've known Matt and Debbie Utesch for years as Patriot League coaching peers/friends and have the utmost respect for their Professionalism, Dedication and Love of Coaching...
I, as well as anyone who has coached for many years, have made mistakes by not realizing something we've said or done with mal-intent was offensive, to an athlete or athletes.
Let the people involved, who have the facts, handle the situation...
Just because someone says something, doesn’t make it true. Just because there is an article doesn’t make it 100% factual. Just because someone says something “strongly” doesn’t make it so. If he’s fired then there is cause. If he isn’t that means there is more to the story that we don’t know.
AreYouPerfect? wrote:
I've known Matt and Debbie Utesch for years as Patriot League coaching peers/friends and have the utmost respect for their Professionalism, Dedication and Love of Coaching...
I, as well as anyone who has coached for many years, have made mistakes by not realizing something we've said or done with mal-intent was offensive, to an athlete or athletes.
Let the people involved, who have the facts, handle the situation...
Even if the administration takes no action, in many ways the damage is done. Lehigh's reputation is hurt, recruiting will suffer, and there will be division on the team between Matt supporters and non-supporters.
What affect do you think this news will have?