What's your most memorable Seinfeld Quote?

Mr. Penske? Of the Penske file?

FRANK: You sayin' you want a piece of me?

ELAINE: I could drop you like a bag of dirt.

FRANK: You wanna piece of me? You got it! (They begin to fight)

"Man, it wasn’t the snooze. Most people think it was the snooze, but no, no snooze."

"Yes, separate knob. Why separate knob?! Why separate knob?! (frustrated)"

Lots of other lines from the hot tub.

Littman: It has come to my attention that you had sex with the cleaning lady on your desk.

George: Who told you that?

Littman: She did.

Jerry's "Summer" George wrote:

From George to Asian lawyer he's trying to date. George tells Jerry to "not be funny" around her or it will hurt his chances with her. She falls for the "melancholy" Jerry anyway:

"Jerry is dark and disturbed? His whole life revolves around Superman and cereal! It was all an act! I put him up to it! You want dark? I'm disturbed, I'm depressed, I'm inadequate. I've got it all! -

From the same episode, while Jerry, Elaine, George and the lawyer are at dinner:

Jerry, being dark and disturbed: “Well, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year’s gone by and how little we’ve grown. No matter how desperate we are that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake we know it’s not to be. That for the rest of our sad, wretched, pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end – inevitably, irrevocably. Happy birthday? No such thing.”

Or...

"I want to be the one person who doesn't die with dignity. I've lived my whole life in shame! Why should I die with dignity?"

Are you master of your domain?

Steinbrenner, telling George a story about eating chili out of a bread bowl for lunch.

"There's nothing more satisfying than looking down after lunch and seeing nothing but a table."

The Ukraine is weak! It's feeble!

So many great lines to choose from, but here's one of my faves that I haven't seen mentioned yet:

"You know Darren, if you would have told me twenty-five years ago that some day I'd be standing here about to solve the world's energy problems, I would've said you're crazy ... Now let's push this giant ball of oil out the window." - Kramer

So many great lines to choose from, but here's one of my faves that I haven't seen mentioned yet:

"You know Darren, if you would have told me twenty-five years ago that some day I'd be standing here about to solve the world's energy problems, I would've said you're crazy ... Now let's push this giant ball of oil out the window." - Kramer

Kramer goes to a fantasy camp. His whole life is a fantasy camp. People should plunk down two-thousand dollars to live like him for a week. Do nothing, fall ass-backwards into money, mooch food off your neighbors, and have sex without dating. That's a fantasy camp!

ESTELLE: "I always talk about your hands, how they're so soft and milky white..."

FRANK: "No, you never said milky white."

ESTELLE: "I SAID MILKY WHITE!"

"Please, please! I cannot have all this constant bickering. Stress is very damaging to the epidermis."

LELAND: Well, I'm sorry. There's just no way that we could keep you on.

KRAMER: I don't even really work here!

LELAND: That's what makes this so difficult.

In this same episode:

George: "Yeah, well I had sex with your wife!"

Everyone silent..."His wife is dead from cancer."

In this same episode:

George: "Yeah, well I had sex with your wife!"

Everyone silent..."His wife is dead from cancer."

moose wrote:

In this same episode:

George: "Yeah, well I had sex with your wife!"

Everyone silent..."His wife is dead from cancer."

Noooo... "His wife's in a coma."

(It's the ep where Kramer watches a movie where a woman is in a coma and decides he needs a living will)

Dolores!

Every time I make a reservation or my wife does for a car, at a restaurant, we say:

"You know how to take a reservation, but you don't know how to keep a reservation."