I ran competitively until 19. I started lifting in the wake of a break up around the same age because I was insecure and thought it would help me with women. To some extent it might have, I remember having visited a friend at his college in the Fall and returning in the Spring all bulked up and there had been girls there during my last visit who were clearly interested in the Spring that hadn't been in the Fall which served as positive reinforcement in a sense, at least based on the my experience of it.
But, and this is a big but, they were sorority party girl types ranging from 18-21 years old. Women like this and at that age are really the only ones who respond to a muscular physique in that way, where it's either "not interested" to "interested". I probably don't need to point out that these women aren't ideal partners, especially if their interest in you is predominantly based on something as superficial as how much muscle you carry on your frame.
I think a better approach is to find a strength training regimen you actually enjoy doing for its own sake. You'd probably land on something closer to an athletic physique (think rugby players or football players circa 1950). If you focus on the vanity side of it for maximum gains, I predict a life of insecurity, strife, and discontentedness. There's a reason fitness "influencers" all reel of psychological dysfunction.
Real relationships with real, quality women are built on much more than physical attraction. I don't think any of the women I've dated in my 30s and on have cared at all about muscle or anything like that beyond just a reasonable regard for health and physical fitness.
Thank God you saved me. I'd hate to hook up with a bunch of 18-21 year old party girls!
That genuinely isn't what I want to do. I want to find someone to marry and raise a family with.
with all else being equal, women prefer a more muscular man compared to the average man. Interesting graphics in this article, which compare the average body type to the preferred:
By actively choosing to move away from average in the opposite direction from the preferred body, you are actively choosing for fewer women to find you physically attractive. You may have a very good reason for this choice (it was my choice for years in school in order to maximize my running success), but iff your priority is to be as physically attractive as possible, to the greatest amount of women, and to have the best sex, lifting heavy weights should be an important component of your weekly activities.
One point that hasn't been said - when you meet your spouse, there is probably a lot of value to be engaging in lifestyle habits that you would want to continue later in life. If you want to be running 80 miles a week when you are 38, might make sense to be doing so when you are with your spouse before being married, as running that much, and all that comes with it, would have a big life impact on your family, particularly if your spouse doesn't understand that lifestyle.
The only thing I learned is that Stan Hayes needs an editor.
Jesus Christ dude I bet you are hell to encounter at a cocktail party.
I appreciate your feedback and I understand that my responses can sometimes be lengthy. While I strive to be concise and clear, the complexity of some topics may require more detailed explanations, and running is my passion.
Your assumption that I would be difficult to encounter at a cocktail party seems unrelated to my posts or my ability to provide insights on running. Socializing skills should not be used to judge one's intellectual capabilities or professional achievements. While I am enthusiastic about running and may have a propensity for discussions in my field, it does not define my entire personality or make me incompatible with social environments. Like anyone else, I am capable of engaging in diverse conversations and sharing viewpoints outside of my expertise.
Constructive criticism is invaluable, and I genuinely appreciate your observation regarding the editor. Nevertheless, it is important to consider one's expertise, knowledge, and overall personal growth holistically, rather than reducing judgment to a single aspect. By embracing a more comprehensive viewpoint, we can foster an enriching environment where individuals can learn, grow, and eventually overcome their limitations.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Wishing you an inspiring journey of continuous learning and growth.
Vain air-heads and modest deep thinkers are both more physically attracted to a more athletic/muscular physique. If you like modest deep thinkers, it is still better to lift if you want to increase their sexual desire in you.
Vain air-heads and modest deep thinkers are both more physically attracted to a more athletic/muscular physique. If you like modest deep thinkers, it is still better to lift if you want to increase their sexual desire in you.
Modest deep thinker types will certainly be more attracted to an athletic physique than a skinny, boney look, but only as part of who that person is holistically and if the lifestyle is reasonable to facilitate that appearance. Hitting the weights 2-3 times a week, mostly normal diet with maybe a protein shake here and there to look like muscular Chris Solinsky and versus 5-7 days a week, tightly programmed high protein diet with supplements to look like Nick Bare... Eh, not so much probably.
Vain air-heads and modest deep thinkers are both more physically attracted to a more athletic/muscular physique. If you like modest deep thinkers, it is still better to lift if you want to increase their sexual desire in you.
Modest deep thinker types will certainly be more attracted to an athletic physique than a skinny, boney look, but only as part of who that person is holistically and if the lifestyle is reasonable to facilitate that appearance. Hitting the weights 2-3 times a week, mostly normal diet with maybe a protein shake here and there to look like muscular Chris Solinsky and versus 5-7 days a week, tightly programmed high protein diet with supplements to look like Nick Bare... Eh, not so much probably.
If you read the article previously posted, you will see the average most attractive body dimensions are somewhere between solinsky and nick bare.
Modest deep thinker types will certainly be more attracted to an athletic physique than a skinny, boney look, but only as part of who that person is holistically and if the lifestyle is reasonable to facilitate that appearance. Hitting the weights 2-3 times a week, mostly normal diet with maybe a protein shake here and there to look like muscular Chris Solinsky and versus 5-7 days a week, tightly programmed high protein diet with supplements to look like Nick Bare... Eh, not so much probably.
If you read the article previously posted, you will see the average most attractive body dimensions are somewhere between solinsky and nick bare.
* Solinksy would be actually less muscular than the average person, while the ideal male is more muscular than the average person. Most women would see Solinsky's body as being below average for being too thin while Nick Bare probably just a bit too lean (but probably close to around the ideal amount of mass). Also, lifting 5-7 times a week seems a whole lot more sensible for most women than running 10 times a week haha.
If you don't do what you love, then you won't love yourself as much and that will not help you. There's no guarantee that switch will land you more women and you could just be unhappy doing something you don't like.
Plus it's a lot easier picking up women on running trails or in running groups than lifting weights, I'm guessing
Went for a long run the summer prior to my sophmore year in high school. Dripping sweat, I turned sideways in front of a full length mirror and disappeared. At 6'4" and 143lbs. , I was a coach Wetmore "condom over a skeleton" prototype. Hit the weights hard and graduated at 220lbs. with muscles that were like rivers of steel. The ladies liked the new me.
If you don't do what you love, then you won't love yourself as much and that will not help you. There's no guarantee that switch will land you more women and you could just be unhappy doing something you don't like.
Plus it's a lot easier picking up women on running trails or in running groups than lifting weights, I'm guessing
Definitely a lot easier meeting women in running groups than at the gym. However, as noted previously, lifting and having a more muscular physique does not preclude you from joining running groups and other running centric social activities. Rather, in most cases it would enhance the chance of meeting or picking up women in those settings.
The original poster is clearly not having as much success as he'd like, by just running. Suggesting him to not change anything obviously won't help him in that regard.
There is just a good of a chance the poster will find happiness in lifting vs. unhappiness.
Went for a long run the summer prior to my sophmore year in high school. Dripping sweat, I turned sideways in front of a full length mirror and disappeared. At 6'4" and 143lbs. , I was a coach Wetmore "condom over a skeleton" prototype. Hit the weights hard and graduated at 220lbs. with muscles that were like rivers of steel. The ladies liked the new me.
This ^.
What scenario is more likely?
A. I started lifting weights, added some decent lean muscle. Most women found me a lot more attractive.
B. I just kept running lots of miles, not adding any weight training. My body stayed the same. All of a sudden most women found my physical attractiveness to change significantly.
C. I started lifting weights, added some decent lean muscle. Most women found me a lot less attractive than when I was scrawny and only running a lot.
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Bodybuilders on the shiny beach from "Muscle Beach Party" movie of 1964. See beautiful vintage bodybuilding photos on http://www.vintagebodybuilding.com/
