OK, maybe I should have offered this sooner to stop this madness, but I do have a solution for everyone here.
There is a way to resolve this whole God issue to everyone's satisfaction.
For those of you who believe in God, I'm sure you would agree that God supports democracy (because we all know he protects & favors the USA). Of course, in order to have democracy you have to have choice & elections.
So my offer is simple - vote for me for God! I promise to wipe out cancer, poverty, war, crime & every form of hatred. No one will ever get sick or starve again (except for Dick Cheney who is going to instantly get every disease known to man).
For the atheists, I will make an appearance on prime-time TV to prove God exists (and honestly, I'll be as surprised by this development as anyone).
But this solution works for everyone. Believers not only get to meet God firsthand, but all the crap in the world immediately ends. And atheists, well, no more uncertainty and no more need to argue about religion.
Best of all, no one has to worry about going to Hell. Except bin Laden. And Cheney.
VOTE FOR PP FOR GOD IN '06!