I'm not being elitist, but I HAVE slow runners.

I truly enjoy this thread. Every time I have looked in I give a little giggle. It is much more than I could have dreamed this thread could ever amount to. Thank you to all those who have provided to its subtle amazing-ness.

"I'm not being elitist...."

Yes you are.

This is a good troll thread in that it includes two of letsruns favorite topics, blatant spelling errors and trying to define what is slow. Good job sir.

This made my day...I hope the guy who originally posted this realizes how silly he looks...nothing worse than making a mistake when you are trying to make a bold statement, even worse when you capitalize that mistake...this site is too full of people like this...you most certainly are being elitist and there are only about 20 people in the world who are the very best...I also like the point about ending obesity, the more people the better!

BTW some very clever posts by people who are much more clever than me

OMG, thanks for that. LOL. I haven't cracked a smile all day and that just cracked me up. :)

JEH wrote:

MUCH better than I expected.

I thought he was going to talk about a very unique case of irritable bowel syndrome that he had on his long run and then proceed to brag about it.

Oh man. I LOL'd.

As funny as the other responses were, this takes the cake.

Harry Kooter wrote:

Or maybe he left out an "S" and meant to say "I shave slow runners." Might be a fetish of his.

Just like that classic song by Elton John, "Someone Shaved My Wife Tonight."

This thread is so funny it hurts.

I have you to deavh.

props to mr conundrum...funniest post ever.

can we get back to the funny now?

If you have slow runners then you need to sleep with a faster boyfriend.

You guys have it all wrong. His error is simply one of tense. He HAD slow runners, but they all got away and now he's annoyed.

take off the pantyhose you weirdo

ok, I made a mistake... And none of you smart asses are clever enough to figure out why. Anyway, apart from being so damned funny, you lot obviously think it's ok that standards have dropped so far. Being 'able' to run 3 miles very slowly is not an achievement unless you are 112 or have one leg. The standards at the bottom end of our sport are worse than any other sport I can think of. And clearly nobody cares.

Ok choir boys. Answer me this:

Would you:

1. Turn up completely unprepared at a local golf tournament and hit 270?

2. Go to the local swimming gala and do the doggy paddle in the 100m freestyle?

3. Play in a tennis match having never used a racquet before and get dumped 6 - 0, 6 - 0?

NO. And I'll tell you something else - you wouldn't get a round of applause, like you do coming in last in a race.

I expect you'd get taken to one side and told to do a bit of practice / preparation before ever coming back.

What's wrong with minimum standards? Why does running open it's doors to the ill prepared and generally useless? It's supposed to be SPORT! We used to have a proper sport a few years ago, but the fatties have turned it into a joke.

You really are being a bit daft...

Nobody turns up to a good XC race, elite road race or track comp without training or having any experience in the sport.

Casual 'fun runners' turn up to FUN RUNS. These are usually staged as a side line to the main race.

I actually find it a complement when fun runners see even the completion of a 5k to be a big achievement. How good must they consider somebody of your stature be ( by your post I can only assume your a sub 14 5k runner. Or am I mistaken and are you just as mediocre?)

Oh and I suppose you've failed to notice the decline in the overall quality of our sport. Open your eyes. What's your solution pillock?

The OP should perhaps distinguish between a marathon and shorter distances. I think that anyone who completes a marathon in under, say, 4:30 has indeed accomplished something. However, completing a 5k in 50 minutes is nonsense, my granny can do that.

If the OP is referring to marathons, then he is on to something to some extent, his vitriol aside. The average American has absolutely no idea of what a decent, solid, or amazingly good marathon time (let alone that they have no idea what the distance is, and that they confuse HM and 10K with FM). People get impressed these days by those that COMPLETE marathons, they are not impressed by the distinction between 2:35, 2:45, 2:59, 3:15, 3:30, 4:00, 5:00, 5:30. A heavy woman in my office has been bragging around that she is "training" for Chicago. Boy, are people impressed with her. If you had her in lineup, she would be the last one you would guess would be a "runner".