Being single in your mid to late 20s is a red flag across the board

800 dude wrote:

If you live in a major city, you're an outlier if you're married before 30.

I think you will find 2 big humps. The people that married before 23 (i.e. right after high school and college) and the then late 20-early 30s crowd. Depending on who you hang with you might have a vastly different idea of what is normal.

adam. wrote:

And this goes both ways.

For guys, unless they've been super busy with life in their 20s - there's something wrong with them that they're single in their late 20s. And for girls, given the vast number of options there is pretty much always a critical relationship-personality flaw that prevented them from being able to stay with someone.

I'll give you guys and gals the very best advice about this. It's never too late to find the most

important thing in life, ....true love! If you just once in your life can find that you are very lucky!

- Mahatma Guru -

ElRunner wrote:

Swaglord_the_real_one wrote:

For girls, yeah. No girls wants to be 32 and single. You're not as hot as before, have possible relationship baggage, and you're in a rush because of the biology of having a kid.

Except for all the 21st century women that have careers and wait to have children until 30s/40s. I’m not even going to comment on the hot part.

There is nothing wrong with a women dedicating herself to pursuing a strong career, but biology often doesn't care about 21st century social conventions. A women waiting until 35+ to bear kids is a huge risk. The rate of genetic mental disorders and flat out still birth of child skyrockets to essentially being a roll of a six sided dice once the women is well into her 30s. Women also have to consider menopause whereby they lose an incredible amount of physical and metabolic functionality once they reach 40-50yrs old. Women have 15yr optimal window for having kids and that window can be much smaller depending on the women's genetics for how they age. There is a definite rush to settle down before that window closes, especially if a women wants multiple kids. A women should not be treated like a failed person for not having kids by 25, but a women wanting children is wasting her limited biological clock by waiting into her 30s to become pregnant.

You are 50% correct.

Guys: With respect to guys, you are wrong. Being single in your late 20s - early 30s is amazing. You are no longer broke, you know yourself and how much $hit you will put up with, you know what you like, girls are no longer intimidating, etc. In other words, unless you are a disaster, and there are many, you "get it" and know how to play the game.

Girls: Correct. Red flag across the board. Women have the biological clock issue and in every culture I've lived in (I've live on 3 continents) women have a societal pressure to be settled down by the time they are 30. The dating / mating market is the most efficient and competitive market on earth. Therefore, if there is a single woman in her late 20s, she is almost certainly a disaster, unless she falls into one of the following categories: (a) recently single - and she wont be for long if she's actually cool, (b) recently hot - used to be overweight or something, or (c) excessively career driven. That's it.

Dude thank you for sharing. I’m a 34 yo surgery resident and hearing that means a lot.

I completely understand what you are saying about a women’s fertility and how it is not bottomless. That being said, I have many friends that have had healthy children in their late 30s and into their 40s. I’ve also have friends that had multiple miscarriages in their mid-20s as well as children with birth defects and special needs while also being in their 20s. I understand that the risks increase as a women gets older, and that any pregnancy 35 and up is considered geriatric. The point I was trying to make is that in modern America many women choose to have a career, and then are able to have children later and they make it work. And yes some of those women have to try multiple times to have a baby and it’s a hard process. But I can’t tell you how many oops babies I know of from women in their late 30s and 40s, that weren’t even trying for a baby. The point is a woman can have a baby what’s considered “later in life” and feel good about it.

Only boring people get married before 30. Everyone else is either busy with their career and/or busy having fun. Get out there and hike the Appalachian and Pacific Crest trails, backpack around Europe and Asia, write that next great novel, start your own business or band, and so on. Committing to a serious relationship in your 20s means you either can't resist peer pressure/societal expectations, or you've just run out of ideas.

Never met a divorced man who was not writing a big check every month.

Never met a divorced woman who was.

You know what, that is so true! First valid point I’ve seen that women are favored more with marriage/divorce. That’s definitely unfair.

Really that's the first inkling? Custody arrangements in divorce cases fit the pattern of female privilige that is universal... granted, the LetsRun redpillers love to hate on this but that doesn't make it untrue.

In this case, rightly so....

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/are-custody-decisions-bia_b_870709

There is simply no way that mothers are truly the better parents 66-88% of the time.

Grad school kid. I was finishing up my doctorate mid-late 20s and a golden rule is you don't marry during graduate studies!...either before or after but never during.

Lol more redpill losers.

Having the extra IQ points to be discerning is a good thing on the whole, I think.

Canada Girl wrote: Men who are still single in their 30’s (I speak from experience) are usually still single because they fall under one of these categories:

- neurotic

- mama’s boy

- cheap

- boring personality

Biggest red flag of all in a woman is her use of the word "cheap" to describe men.

The women who use this term as a shaming/peer-pressure challenge tool are the ones who are so financially irresponsible they can't manage on their own. Years ago I met some like this, and I ran far. Wasn't long before they ended up either declaring BK or totally mooching off the next dumb "serious bf" to pay her debts - all accumulated before she even met him. The dude would be a doofus to agree to this, and the socially-manipulative power of the term is clear to all guys, but somehow...they do.

Conversely, why do men never use that word "cheap" to describe the large number of women who don't pay their own way? You know, including the usual dating scenario where she implicitly expects him to pick up the tab for dinner/show/fun - from the male pov, one of the most hated features of the typical modern "date" and especially medieval in the days when many young graduate women earn more than their male peers.

Cheap... some women really know how to do that.... and yes, it would be a much more accurate use of the term.

Why can't women also be busy with other things in their 20s? What if someone just wants to focus on med/law school or something? Honestly, I'm in my early 20's and I've been in a long term relationship for a while, but if it didn't work out I wouldn't actively seek another relationship until I get my career rolling. I tend to function pretty well on my own.

I don't see how this is a red flag? There are so many reasons why someone isn't in a relationship.

You must be broke. Or clueless. Or both.

Women flock to wealth. That has been happening since the beginning of time. It will never change.

ARSPEN wrote:

You must be broke. Or clueless. Or both.

Women flock to wealth. That has been happening since the beginning of time. It will never change.

This is why I prefer hookers. Cheaper, often safer, and much more honest for both sides.

This x100. I never want to get divorced. I would rather stay single the rest of my life then raise a family and get divorced. Divorce seems like one of the most disappointing and sad things that occurs in modern life.

Good looking women have trouble holding onto guys.

That's because the kind of guy that can land a hot chick will usually cheat on her, as other hot chicks will be attracted to him.