nope. it's democrats
nope. it's democrats
WhyRegisterHere? wrote:
"Have a conversation about" is academic identitarian-speak for mob-style swarm attack through virtue-signaling. No thank you, I have no interest in SJW 'conversations', thank you very much.
What do non academic-identitarian-virtue-signaling mobs call talking about something?
Not a rhetorical question. I've never seen someone react to the phrase "have a conversation" so I'm curious what you think that means and what you feel like you need to defend yourself from.
I guarantee that of the men who harass and assault women, none of them are adherents of Ayn Rand’s philosophy.
I know a female runner who touristed Saudi Arabia and visited Mecca by herself. She had no problems at all. I think it all depends upon how much of a victim you want to set yourself up to be.
.. wrote:
WhyRegisterHere? wrote:
"Have a conversation about" is academic identitarian-speak for mob-style swarm attack through virtue-signaling. No thank you, I have no interest in SJW 'conversations', thank you very much.
What do non academic-identitarian-virtue-signaling mobs call talking about something?
Not a rhetorical question. I've never seen someone react to the phrase "have a conversation" so I'm curious what you think that means and what you feel like you need to defend yourself from.
What it's starting to mean to me is: you need to listen to me because I'm versed in the academically recognized solutions based on academically defined axioms. It has nothing to do with actual dialogue. The other person isn't curious about your opinions or background.
Runners World wrote:
https://www.runnersworld.com/women/a29196004/toxic-masculinity/?utm_source=twitter&utm_medium=social-media&utm_campaign=socialflowTWRWRunners World article claiming that women can't run at night because of me. this is dumb af.
Toxic femininity at its finest
HA!!! You're right! But it doesn't change the fact that we can't/shouldn't run at night, beautiful country roads, or miles trails or when traffic is low.
Ya'know I wish every guy could live one day in the shoes of a woman..(not Caitlin).
The watching, looking out, being careful where you park, learning how to get into your car. Locking the door immediately .ALWAYS letting somebody you know , know where you are and when you are leaving or arriving. Don't look at guys in the eye, being careful what you say.
Safety is not a given.
Yes, you absolutely right!!
So, you want to bring up the real man thing again? Ok.
Criteria for being a real man:
1) Military service
2) Primary caretaker for elderly or disabled person that's NOT your vocation -- so like a parent or other family member.
3) Worker in some way in a war zone -- construction, journalist, whatever.
4) Married, active father to 2-4 children. You must live in the same house with those children and the mother, and you must take care of them financially and emotionally. You can't be a BAD father and be a man. You also do not have to procreate. You could be a father to them by adoption or marriage (wife had kids from previous marriage for example). Need at least 2 to fully feel what it's like to be a father, and more than 4 just allows the kids to take care of themselves too much, so 2-4 kids is the range. Now, if you had 4 and then one moves out and you had a 5th, then I'd accept that.
Those are the main ways to be a man. I would consider others if you want to provide them.
A single guy though who never has children and works to support himself and his lifestyle and doesn't fall into any of the other criteria I spelled out isn't a real man in my opinion. To be a real man requires serious responsibility, and that isn't fully realized for most people unless they are a GOOD father to 2-4 children.
Guess what? EVERY reasonable person does those things. To live in this world is to live in a dangerous place, beautiful but fraught with peril. You are mistakenly transferring the universal to the tribal. Do you truly believe that only women are attacked in this world? Open your eyes, wake up. Slicing and dicing by 'identity' is the most divisive and corrosive way we can approach life. It's in vogue right now and it is malignant. Stop it. You and I, almost no matter who you are and who I am, are almost entirely the same in that we are human beings, with much more sameness than difference, but only if you open your eyes and run away from the poison spewing from academia and SJW woke culture.
patti wrote:
HA!!! You're right! But it doesn't change the fact that we can't/shouldn't run at night, beautiful country roads, or miles trails or when traffic is low.
Ya'know I wish every guy could live one day in the shoes of a woman..(not Caitlin).
The watching, looking out, being careful where you park, learning how to get into your car. Locking the door immediately .ALWAYS letting somebody you know , know where you are and when you are leaving or arriving. Don't look at guys in the eye, being careful what you say.
Safety is not a given.
patti wrote:
HA!!! You're right! But it doesn't change the fact that we can't/shouldn't run at night, beautiful country roads, or miles trails or when traffic is low.
Ya'know I wish every guy could live one day in the shoes of a woman..(not Caitlin).
The watching, looking out, being careful where you park, learning how to get into your car. Locking the door immediately .ALWAYS letting somebody you know , know where you are and when you are leaving or arriving. Don't look at guys in the eye, being careful what you say.
Safety is not a given.
Finally, a post on this thread I can understand. Really sorry women have to worry about the things you mention, men certainly don't. As a runner I am cognizant of the fact that women have to be on their guard all the time. I never wave or say anything to a single female runner I pass unless they acknowledge me first. I just feel like they don't need the added stress of wondering what my "Howdy" REALLY meant. Nothing a man does out there can be taken at face value. The other day I was running through a highway underpass where homeless hang out (of course, care-free being that I'm a man). There were two guys down there and they seemed fine and paid me no heed as I passed by. As I'm coming out I see a woman runner going in by herself. I thought to myself - DANGER - and thought well, maybe I should turn around and run back until she was through. But can't do that - I'd be a stalker. Instead I stopped and pretended I needed to tie my shoe until she had gone completely through the underpass without any incident. Then I carried on with my run. I certainly don't think a lone female runner should go through there. These situations are tough. Carry on, sister!
I am not trying to argue, just open some more points for thought.
As a man, here are certain things that I deal with on a daily basis that I have seen described as unique to one gender/ethnicity/social economic condition. I worry about running through sketchy areas. I deal with total a$$holes at work, I have people look at me threateningly, I have people try to talk over me or question my experience/expertise. I see those people as jerks. They are jerks and no one should try to be like them.
We all deal with this stuff, and only the - apparently - super tough guy in the post above doesn't worry about running through homeless encampments. I was running at dark the other week in Nashville on that river path and suddenly realized that I was right in the middle of a bunch of homeless tents. It was freaky because they were drinking and I had no idea where I was going. I am a grown man, fit, and I even have a fair amount of martial arts training (albeit from a fitness perspective; I don't really fight people). I was terrified. I am always aware of my surroundings and always thinking about how to protect my family if something were to happen. In church, in restaurants, in the car, in parking lots... It happens to us, too.
Are women more likely to get attacked? Yes. Do men gallivant through life without a care in the world? No.
We're in this together. Let's work on helping each other out instead of blaming the blameless because it makes for good social media fun.
don't like "having a conversation" wrote:
.. wrote:
What do non academic-identitarian-virtue-signaling mobs call talking about something?
Not a rhetorical question. I've never seen someone react to the phrase "have a conversation" so I'm curious what you think that means and what you feel like you need to defend yourself from.
What it's starting to mean to me is: you need to listen to me because I'm versed in the academically recognized solutions based on academically defined axioms. It has nothing to do with actual dialogue. The other person isn't curious about your opinions or background.
And so by saying you didn't want to have a "conversation," aren't you also just saying you're not curious about others' opinions or background? You're throwing out "conversations" with a whole subset of people just because you've built this (honestly) inaccurate idea that they all a hive mind policing each others' thoughts?
I have groups of good liberal friends and good conservative friends, and honestly guys, we all operate about the same. We all put the same amount of pressure on each other to conform. But an honest difference I have seen is that liberals are generally more open to the idea that they might be wrong and that other people's experiences are relevant to their understanding of the world. Conservatives tend to put more (or all) emphasis on their own experiences, and they get more upset/defensive when anyone challenges their personal worldview.
As a liberal in academia, though admittedly in STEM and not on the coast, I've never personally encountered any liberals who have said "oh those people, I don't care what they think." Lots of my peers are frustrated for sure, but I've never seen that wholesale dismissiveness that people seem to think widely exists. And when they say "conversation"... they actually just mean conversation.
Co-Flounder wrote:
I know a female runner who touristed Saudi Arabia and visited Mecca by herself. She had no problems at all. I think it all depends upon how much of a victim you want to set yourself up to be.
I left my car door unlocked and it wasn't stolen. No need to lock my car right? We are talking low probability events. One could be 10x more dangerous than the other and the odd of it showing up in 1 trial are low.
Respektful wrote:
I was running at dark the other week in Nashville on that river path and suddenly realized that I was right in the middle of a bunch of homeless tents. It was freaky because they were drinking and I had no idea where I was going. I am a grown man, fit, and I even have a fair amount of martial arts training (albeit from a fitness perspective; I don't really fight people). I was terrified. I am always aware of my surroundings and always thinking about how to protect my family if something were to happen. In church, in restaurants, in the car, in parking lots... It happens to us, too.
I appreciate your take here.
What were you scared of when running past the homeless tents? I'm a woman, and I imagine that you, as a man, would be scared of getting beaten up or mugged? Even though you knew you are fit and have martial arts training? Understanding that worse things could happen, I imagine that is your baseline concern. (?)
As a small woman, I've never been scared of getting beaten up. My baseline concern is being raped, abducted, and/or killed, because that's the kind of stuff that happens disproportionately to women. I actually can't recall ever hearing of men being raped or abducted while on a run, whereas there are plenty of women's stories.
I run a ton of places on my own, but I would never run along an unknown path, at night, in a city, alone. I would never put myself in the situation you put yourself in. Not trying to shame you or something, just pointing out that while that might have been terrifying for you in the moment, I would never even be so nonchalant to even end up in that situation.
.. wrote:
But an honest difference I have seen is that liberals are generally more open to the idea that they might be wrong and that other people's experiences are relevant to their understanding of the world. Conservatives tend to put more (or all) emphasis on their own experiences, and they get more upset/defensive when anyone challenges their personal worldview.
-999999/10
I guess I would say getting killed. Being fit or trained really does little in today's world. Even if I were an MMA guy, someone could still knock me over the head with a 2x4. If someone is going to do something to you, they are going to stab or shoot you. Or I guess a group could all come up and beat you, but you'd end up dead or TBI if that happened, so the outcome is basically the same. It's not like one person is going to draw box and challenge you to a fist fight.
So getting killed is what I fear.
I totally understand your final point. I would never put myself in that scenario either, but it happened. I had a friend send me a route and about 3/4 of the way through it started getting dark. I am not sure if you're familiar with Nashville, but this was a riverwalk path that is marketed by the city. As you enter downtown, it weaves through a wooded area. I was not expecting this and it scared the crap out of me. I was on a big loop and the path was 100% safe until this 1.4 mile stretch. I wouldn't do it again.
I am not arguing that it is equal. I get that you're likely in more danger than me. I guess my point was that everyone faces fear and it isn't always the fault of men. Sometimes it is just a psycho or a total jerk.
Most women aren't as physically powerful as men and cannot defend themselves.
Men have to be agressive to find their place in society.
Nice guy goes nowhere, generally, in my experience.
You are taking the article personally. You can run at night.
.. wrote:
And so by saying you didn't want to have a "conversation," aren't you also just saying you're not curious about others' opinions or background? You're throwing out "conversations" with a whole subset of people just because you've built this (honestly) inaccurate idea that they all a hive mind policing each others' thoughts?
This is a very cheap "gotcha". That's not what I'm doing. I know what "a conversation" means and I know that I'll be shamed if I don't conform. Having a conversation with someone doesn't have to have a wrapper of "a conversation". I never said I don't talk to people who disagree with me, which for some reason you assumed is what I meant.
You're right, we are all absolutely the same. But we aren't treated the same, or raised the same. The way we raise boys and girls is very different, especially among my generation...(boomers. lol) Women are taught from infancy to protect themselves from men.
we're given rape whistles, pepper sprays, mace, we walk to our cars with keys in our fist. We always need a friend, we can't leave a drink alone, and if we leave our drink unattended, we have to throw it away. We can't smile at men too long or wear a low-cut blouse or drink around strangers, because that's "being unsafe," because ANYONE could be a predator ... because when we're assaulted...harrassed...attacked...it always gets asked. What were you wearing? Did you flirt with him? ... did you drink?
My daughter was eight or nine years old when she started getting wolf-whistled and catcalled by men driving by...she couldn't even take out the garbage. She was a little girl. I saw it happen with my own eyes. we get taught very young to be afraid.
We're taught to treat every strange man we interact with like a threat, which ABSOLUTELY hurts men just as much as it hurts women. men aren't animals and they shouldn't be treated like that...all men aren't out to attack women, and yet... every woman is trained to defend themselves from men.
men and women are not raised the same. We are all the same...all equal...with the potential to do good or bad things. but we aren't treated the same, or taught the same lessons as children. THat's the meaning of "toxic" masculinity...not that masculinity os toxic (masculinity is wonderful!!) but because...they're taught things as children that make them angry...make them lonely. gotta MAN UP, be strong, be tough...and show off for your friends.
those men catcalling my daughter were not trying to "hit on" a little girl...they were showing off for their friends...or making themselves feel strong, feel manly.
your experience is not universal. Other people experience life differently...we get treated differently...we get judged differently.
We are all equal, but we are not treated equally. if we pretend t hat we're all the same...with exactly the same lives and experiences...nothing will change. We won't fix inequality...we'll just keep pretending it doesn't exist.