Child support and you have your kids 50/50 is not right in most cases

A lot of the laws are antiquated. No politician would dare make a move to change them.

What did your lawyer tell you?

yeah sucks, and isn't fair; maybe have a discussion wither your ex if you really think she doesn't need the child support. Also 10 years is a perfect time to start training, sounds like you won't be affording college, so they better get to work.

50/50 doesn't count from what I remember. The primary (usually mom) custodial parent has most of the power. That being said, the court will recognize if mom is a nut job (my case) and help the dad. Good luck and fight for the right to raise your kid(s).

Titan wrote:

50/50 doesn't count from what I remember. The primary (usually mom) custodial parent has most of the power. That being said, the court will recognize if mom is a nut job (my case) and help the dad. Good luck and fight for the right to raise your kid(s).

Not true; in 50/50 physical custody cases, there is usually no domiciliary aka primary parent, since they are sharing physical custody equally. Back in the 80's it was thought that the man would get every other weekend and the woman would have primary custody, an example of that would be Kramer versus Kramer the movie. That has vastly changed in the last 10 years. In fact lots of men get primary custody, but 50/50 is very common, unless you have a job that won't allow that, which a lot of people do have nowadays. An example would be someone who works offshore and isn't home very much, or if you have a job that doesn't fit into a 50/50 custody schedule. Now in terms of nut job, your referring to supervised visitation, or no visitation at all because not jobs or people prone to domestic violence, or substance abuse, do not get over nights at all until the problem has been corrected and satisfied with the courts.

markarian wrote:

yeah sucks, and isn't fair; maybe have a discussion wither your ex if you really think she doesn't need the child support. Also 10 years is a perfect time to start training, sounds like you won't be affording college, so they better get to work.

Let's see how that conversation goes; " hi ex l am not doing well and can't afford child support and you seem to be having to much fun. Can we just forget the child support, since we share the kids and they live with both of us"? Most ex wives respond, " ha ha, better luck next time, l am dirt poor and need that money". Ever thought about working at McDonald's for a while, then make her pay you?

Get an attorney and see if you can file a motion for review (reconsideration) of the child support based on your current financial situation. You do know you will have to go to court for that, right? And you do know the attorney will ask for $$$.

Just food for your thought. Good luck!

Child support and 50/50 ? wrote:

My daughter asked me why we don't do fun stuff, like at her Mom's. It's because l can't afford it.

Would have loved to see you answer that.

“Fun stuff” doesn’t have to cost a lot of money, but it’s hard to compete with going to Hawai’i I get that.

Ultimately, if your kids are actively suffering because of your financial agreement with the courts then they would probably be open to changing it. If your kids are doing just fine and it’s just you suffering they aren’t going to care.

The wife can go on vacation every year because if you didn't give her money neither of you could take the kids on vacation.

So, propose to the court that one year you pay the ex and one year she pays you, so you can both afford to take the kids on vacation in alternate years.

In my state either parent can petition the court for reconsideration of child support. When that happens, the respondent has to provide proof of income and child expenses they pay (health care, day care, buying clothes, sports fees, etc). Then the judge reviews everything and can amend the child support order. You'd have to pay for a lawyer and possibly court fees but that might be what it takes.

You should have thought about that before you decided to split up. Plus you know she is choking on someone else right now. Marriage should be forever.

Child support and 50/50 ? wrote:

you shouldn't be penalized just because you make a tad more.

What is this tad equal to?

If her income has increased since the split and yours has gone down, you could contest it and have the ratio modified. The law is typically reasonable in most cases. What you are battling is that at the time of the split, it is likely you were the primary financial supporter of the children, so the percentage of money each parent was expected to contribute (70/30) to the children's well being was set relative to that with consideration of the shared custody. Divorce sucks, and it sucks for the kids more than it does for you. Stop complaining about having to support the kids you brought in to this world.

doctorj wrote:

Get an attorney and see if you can file a motion for review (reconsideration) of the child support based on your current financial situation. You do know you will have to go to court for that, right? And you do know the attorney will ask for $$$.

Just food for your thought. Good luck!

The attorney will probably want about $2000 to $3000 up front before they start working on your case and also quote you their hourly fee which could easily be $200-$350 an hour depending upon where you live.

its an absolute crime that our system necessitates having a lawyer for something that should be 100% objective based on financial statements. .

Each state in U.S. has their own family court laws. The big differences: Some states start with a joint custody/joint parenting time assumption; some states start with assumption of one parent as primary custodian (mother). Obviously, the facts of each case may or may not move the needle. You are wrong to make assumptions of O.P.'s family law case without knowing which state and without knowing the details of O.P.'s family law case.

It depends on the judge.

Family court is going to rule in favor of what is best for the children. If the op can demonstrate that the children are better off if his payments are reduced because he is supporting them then he will have a chance of getting it changed.

Most states have some methodology for calculating child support. My state uses the "income shares" model. So do 40 other states (

http://www.ncsl.org/research/human-services/guideline-models-by-state.aspx

).

In my state, if your income went down and her's went up, then your support would be adjusted (and you might even end up receiving support).

In my state, there is a worksheet that you fill out with your and your ex's incomes, child expenses, number of days each of you has with the child, and a few other things. When you fill it out it tells you who owes who how much child support. To get a modification, you do have to file a motion but since the judge has to go by what the worksheet says, you don't really need a lawyer.

I would suggest telling you ex that you plan on modifying child support because of income changes and (nicely, via some email or text) ask her for the information you would need to complete the worksheet. That way if she is a jerk about it you have evidence incase you need to hire a lawyer to compel her to participate.